35. Volt
Volt
“He’s eating dinner,” Oliver reported, his warm honey voice projecting from above the door.
“Thank you,” Volt made himself say.
Volt had put his clothes back on just so he wouldn’t feel so exposed while he was already feeling so vulnerable.
He’d noticed that his jeans were torn in one knee. What kind of nightmare had Wallace gone through, getting him to Ben and Oliver’s house when he was all but unresponsive?
Wallace had done so much for him, saving him, bringing him to the home of people who had every reason to hate them and turn them away…
And Volt had brought it all down on himself by being scared. By not trusting Wallace enough.
God, had he fucked up.
“Would you like to try the new circuit board for your arm now?”
Volt jerked at Oliver’s voice, though he’d spoken only seconds ago. He looked down at the useless lump of gears and pistons that hung from his shoulder. He’d turned off the alerts about it because he couldn’t handle them with everything else going on.
Now that he had time to think, the whole situation left him even more shaken.
Little glimpses were coming back to him. Wallace’s frantic screams and distraught commands. His model number, chanted over and over again. Walking blindly in the dark, with no idea where he was going and no will of his own.
It was a harsh reminder that he was a programmed thing. A tool. A robot.
He had free will, but it could so easily be taken away.
And what was he doing with it anyway?
How much of him was programmed—a sex toy built to the specifications of other people’s desires—and how much was really him?
He wanted to be Wallace’s Daddy more than anything, but he was starting to realize that Wallace couldn’t be his whole life.
He needed to be more. To keep Wallace’s respect… and for himself, too.
“Maybe not yet?” he replied to Oliver, knowing that he’d let the question drag out far too long.
He knew that he should get his arm fixed, since Oliver was offering and probably wanted him out of his house. But it seemed like a fitting punishment. How could he be whole when Wallace was upset with him?
Not to mention that there was an actual chance of something going wrong with any spark when new parts were integrated. With something this small, it was unlikely, but if there was even a small backlash, he didn’t think he was up for it.
“No hurry,” Oliver said, easily.
“Would you mind texting my brother, Angel, though?” Volt had to ask.
He felt horrible making the request, but being cut off from the internet was so much worse than the loss of his arm.
Not having the world’s data at his virtual fingertips made him actually think differently, aware suddenly of how limited his own processing was without instant access to information.
And he missed Angel. These past few days must have been hell on him.
“Absolutely,” Oliver agreed. “I already told him that you’re awake and sent several pictures. I’ve been giving him regular status updates about your and Wallace’s well-being. What should I tell him?”
“Uh…” Now that he knew Oliver had taken care of all that, he wasn’t sure. Mostly, he wanted his brother to tell him how to fix things with Wallace. “I guess just tell him that I’m awake and I miss him and I’ll be back at Prism soon.”
“Sent,” Oliver replied, almost immediately.
Then they both waited.
Entire actual seconds.
Long seconds.
It just reminded Volt of how disconnected he was. His communications with Angel had always been automatic. Instantaneous. Like reaching out to a second part of himself.
“He says,” Oliver replied, “Can’t wait to see you.”
Volt’s eyebrows furrowed when he heard the message. He’d expected… Well, something different. More information. A proclamation that Angel was going to drop everything and visit him, maybe? A demand that Volt get a device so they could talk directly?
Bursts of static and memes, honestly. The fuzzy feeling he got when Angel was just a message away, there for whatever he needed.
But of course, it was evening. Prism must be open, and Angel was probably at the door. Magnolia was in the hospital. Angel couldn’t just abandon all of his responsibilities for Volt.
“Can you ask how Magnolia’s doing?” Volt asked.
Oliver’s response was quicker this time. “He says she’s fine. She ate some soup while he was visiting today. They might let her out tonight.”
Volt let out a little sigh. That was good.
But he wanted to hear her voice. He wanted her advice.
He wanted his family.
Or did he not mean enough to them either?
No, he wasn’t going to think that. Angel was undoubtedly busy if Magnolia was about to come home. There was a good chance that he hadn’t even told Magnolia about the takeover mod, not wanting to worry her when she was so fragile.
It was only Wallace who he’d fucked things up with.
Wallace who said he would never leave him… but then walked out of the room.
“He loves you,” Oliver added.
Volt looked up at the ceiling camera. “Maybe.”
“No,” Oliver argued. “He does. He’s complaining to Ben—which is hilarious, by the way, because my brat has the emotional maturity of a wet raccoon and has no idea how to respond—but Wallace is going to come around.”
“You think so?” Volt asked, willing to cling to any hope.
“Yeah. He’s angry, but mostly he’s hurt. You two will be alright, though.”
Volt blew out a breath. He wasn’t convinced, but he would cling to any thread he had right now. “Thank you. I mean, really. Thank you for everything. For fixing me up, for taking care of Wallace, just… thank you. If you ever need anything, please always let me know.”
“Happy to help,” Oliver agreed. “I’m glad our subbies are getting along. They’re both a little prickly at first, and they need more friends.”
Volt gave his first real smile. “You’re trying to push them together?”
“Absolutely,” said Oliver, sounding smug. “I think they have a lot more in common than they realize. They’ve both been abandoned, and they’re both working on trusting that their Doms aren’t going anywhere. There’s a type of healing that they can do together, though, that we can’t do for them.”
Volt nodded slowly. He’d known that, but he hadn’t really thought of it that way. “Even when I’m the one who hurt him?” he asked, the fear pouring out of him.
“Even then. Maybe especially then. You’re going to make mistakes. I am going to make mistakes. But you apologized, and you’ll do better. Wallace and Ben both need to know that a little fight isn’t the end of the world.”
Volt nodded. He hadn’t realized how good it would feel to have someone he could talk with about this stuff. “Thank you for saying that. I’m… I’m pretty new to this Daddying thing, at least outside of a scene. And it’s… It’s harder than I thought. I’ve been fucking it up.”
Oliver hummed thoughtfully. “Not nearly as much as you probably think.”
Volt raised one eyebrow. “Did you see Wallace go storming out of here an hour ago?”
“I saw your Wallace stay by your bedside for two days, telling you stories about your lives together. Just now, I saw him calmly take some time to himself, then attempt to talk it out with a friend, knowing that he feels safe enough to disagree with you and then come back.”
Volt could feel a wobbly smile on his face. “I hope so. I mean, I’m actually really proud of him. He’s stood up to me a couple times now, and he never would have done that a few months ago. I mean, I feel terrible for disappointing him, but he was absolutely right to call me on it.”
“And that’s what makes you an excellent Daddy.”
Volt’s fans sped up as his temperature rose. He really hoped he wasn’t blushing. It meant something, though, coming from this calm, mature knowledge who clearly had so much love for his own boy. “You seem to be a great Dom for Ben,” he finally replied.
“Some days, I like to think so,” Oliver joked. “But we’re a work in progress, too. Hell, maybe Wallace will be a good influence on Ben.”
“You love that he’s a brat,” Volt teased. He’d only seen them together for a few minutes, but he had to assume it was true.
“I do,” Oliver agreed. “I’m a very lucky spark. But I think it’ll be good for Ben to see that someone can be vulnerable with their feelings and still be strong. Your Wallace excels at that.”
“Yeah,” Volt sighed. “He really, really does. If anything, I’m the one who needs to learn from him. I was… I was trying so hard to be a good Daddy Dom to him that I fucked up the boyfriend part. I should have trusted him more.”
It felt good to say it. To get the perspective of another Dom, who he was rapidly growing to trust.
“Maybe so, maybe not,” Oliver replied. “There are a lot of different levels of trust, and you guys are pretty new together, right? Some subs in a Daddy kink relationship don’t want to worry about the adult world.
And some of those secrets weren’t really yours to tell.
There are probably some things you could have done differently, but you need to give yourself some grace, too. ”
“I guess.” Maybe in a few days—if Wallace took him back—Volt could look back on this moment with that sort of perspective, but right now he was still freaking out.
“For what it’s worth, I’d love for you and Wallace to spend more time with us in the future. Come over for dinner, join us on a trip, that type of thing.”
“Yeah?” Volt asked. He hadn’t expected such a generous welcome, especially with Wallace and Ben’s antagonistic past.
“Yeah. We actually even talked with Wallace about manufacturing some nursebots.”
“Really?” Volt’s code glitched and leapt, almost like he was dancing. “My god, he would love that. He’s been trying to launch that project for years.”
“So I heard. Ben and I didn’t even know about the project until this week, but we can see how passionate Wallace is about it. Your baby girl is really sweet, once you get past the surface. And I can see how much growing he’s done with you as his Daddy.”
Now Volt was sure he was blushing… and he didn’t let himself turn off the algorithm. He wanted to feel all of his feelings.