Chapter Eleven
Shadow
She was just here.
I’d been watching, pretending I wasn’t, but I was. Every move behind that bar, every fake smile she gave Ragnor. One second, she’s pouring a drink, and the next, she’s gone. Again.
I push off the table where I’d been sitting, scanning the room. My jaw tightens.
“Where’d Remi go?” I bark at the nearest prospect.
He blinks, startled. “Uh, dunno, brother. Thought she was still behind the bar.”
The fact no one clocked her slipping out sets my teeth grinding.
I stalk towards the bar, checking the back room, the bathrooms. Empty. Each door I shove open just winds me tighter.
She’s like smoke—every time I get close, she slips through my fingers. And it pisses me off.
Ragnor’s laugh drifts across the room, sharp as glass. My head snaps his way. He’s leaning against the bar, an easy grin in place. My gut says he knows something.
I shove past a couple brothers, closing the distance. “You seen Remi?”
His grin widens, deliberate. “Not my job to keep tabs on your girl.”
“She’s not my—” I bite the words off, heat crawling up my neck. “I’m just trying to keep her safe, brother. Have you seen her or not?”
He takes a lazy sip of his whiskey. “Maybe she just needed space. You ever think of that?”
Space. The word makes my palms itch. She doesn’t need space. She needs looking after. And if Ragnor’s steering her somewhere, if he’s the reason she’s gone . . .
My hands curl at my sides into tight fists. As if he senses my rage building, he holds a hand up, still grinning, and says, “She went that way,” then he points towards the stairs.
I don’t bother to answer as I take off in that direction, rushing up the stairs two at a time and busting into my room.
I freeze at the sight of Sasha lying naked on my bed. She grins, running her hand over her bare thigh. “Well, it’s about time.”
“What are you doing?” I ask, glancing round the room for any sign that Remi was here.
“Waiting for you, obviously,” she purrs, letting her legs fall apart. “Now, are we fucking or talking?”
“Has Remi been in here?” I demand.
She rolls her eyes, slamming her legs closed. “Remi . . . again. Seriously?”
I close the gap between us, grabbing her by the upper arm and hauling her to her feet. I grab her discarded dress and thrust it against her chest as I march her to the open door. “I told you already, stop fucking hanging off me like a desperate whore. I’m not interested.”
I slam the door in her face as she screams curses at me. There’s no trace of Remi here, and her pyjamas—my shirt and shorts—are still screwed-up on the bed where she left them this morning.
I go back out into the hall, thankful that Sasha has left. “Remi?” I call out, hoping she’s somewhere nearby, but when she doesn’t show, I start opening doors.
A lot of the rooms along this floor are empty, used for guests when we have other charters over. I go up the next flight of stairs, onto the whores’ floor, and begin throwing open doors. Smoke shouts in surprise, tangled in the sheets with a blonde I don’t recognise. “The fuck, brother?”
“Have you seen Remi?”
He blinks, dazed. “No, I––”
I slam the door closed before he can finish.
Next room, same thing. I tear it open, startling Pit, who’s mid-hand of cards with two others. They stare like I’ve lost my mind.
“Remi?”
Blank looks. A shake of the head.
My chest is tight, breaths coming harsh. I check the bathrooms, the spare closets, even the goddamn laundry room. Every second I don’t find her, the panic claws deeper.
By the time I storm back into the main room, every brother in the place is watching me like I’ve finally snapped.
“Shadow!” Axel’s voice cracks across the room like a whip. “What the hell are you doing?”
I ignore him, shoving past to pound on another door at the far end. No answer. I kick it open anyway. Empty.
“She was just here,” I bellow, voice raw. “Where the fuck is she?”
The whole place has gone silent now, every eye on me. My fists clench, nails digging into my palms. She can’t have just vanished. Not again.
Axel steps closer. “Let’s step into the office.”
I bite down on a curse and follow him. The door shuts behind us with a heavy thud.
“Start again,” he says carefully, leaning on the door.
“Remi’s gone. Again.” My voice cracks on the word, and I rub my brow, frantic.
“You’ve checked everywhere?” I nod, my breaths coming out short. “Then relax. She’ll show up. Why are you getting so ate up over this woman?”
“I’m worried about her,” I mutter. “She’s vulnerable, even though she acts like she isn’t.”
“We still don’t know what she’s mixed up in,” he reminds me.
“That too,” I admit.
He sighs. “Alright. We’ll send the men out to look for her.”
My head snaps up. “Really?”
“Brother,” he says simply, “if she means something to you, then of course. We take care of our own.”
Relief crashes through me. “Thanks, Pres.”
The door creaks open, and Kasey pokes her head in before she’s invited. Axel growls. “What?”
“Atlas said Shadow’s losing his mind over Remi,” she says casually. “I just wanted you to know she’s fine.”
I shove past her, scanning the main room, desperate to see her sitting there, safe. But she isn’t, and my chest hollows. I whirl back to Kasey. “Where is she?” I hiss.
“Relax, big guy. She just wanted some space.”
“Not what I asked,” I snarl.
Atlas strolls over, eyebrows up. “Everything okay?”
“She’s covering for Remi,” I snap.
Kasey folds her arms. “I promised I’d keep it quiet. I only said she’s fine because Atlas was about to have a coronary over your little breakdown. Which, by the way, is weird. No wonder she needs space.”
“You don’t get it.”
Atlas sighs. “Just tell him.”
Kasey smirks, flicking her gaze to a door at the end of the hall. Then, she turns on her heel, sauntering off.
I don’t wait. My boots pound down the hall, my hand twisting the handle. It’s locked.
“Remi?” I tap once, then again, harder. “Are you in there?”
Axel frowns. “That’s a cleaning cupboard. Nobody’s used it in years.”
I ignore him, pressing my palm flat to the wood. “Please, Remi. Just open up so I know you’re okay.”
Silence.
The brothers drift off, muttering, but I stay planted. Because I know she’s in there. I can feel it.
I slide down until my backside hits the ground. My voice drops low. “I’ve been fighting it. The way I feel about you. Thought maybe it’d just go away, because you’re not ready. Anyone can see that. But every time I look over, Ragnor’s there, chatting you up, and fuck, I hate it.”
Her voice finally slips through, small and muffled. “He does it to piss you off.”
Relief loosens my chest. I let out a short laugh. “Yeah, I know. Still pisses me off, though.”
I tip my head back against the door, staring at the ceiling. “I’m no good at this, Rem. I always fuck up. I can’t hold a relationship down. I cheat, I hurt people. But you, you make me want to try.”
The lock clicks, and I scramble to my feet as the door swings open. She stands there, eyes wide, hair mussed, staring up at me.
“I don’t trust men,” she says softly. “They only ever use me. I don’t think I’ve ever known one who actually looked out for me.” She pauses, swallowing. “Until you. And I should be furious you went after Dean, but it was kind of sweet.”
A grin pulls at my mouth. “Yeah?”
She nods, stepping closer. “We can’t be anything serious.” My chest squeezes. “I don’t even know if I’m staying.”
But I know she is, because I don’t think I can watch her walk away.
“I like being around you,” she admits.
I hook my finger around hers, tugging her closer. My palm cups her cheek, my voice low. “Then I’ll take that. Just stop disappearing on me, Remi. It drives me crazy.”
Her lips part like she’s about to argue, but I don’t let her. I lean down, closing the space, and press my mouth to hers.
This one isn’t hesitant like the first. It’s fierce, desperate, with all the minutes of panic, all the searching, crashing into one kiss. She stiffens for a heartbeat then melts, her fingers curling into the front of my shirt.
I angle my head, deepening it, tasting her. She tastes like fire and defiance and something I shouldn’t want this badly. My hand slides into her hair, holding her steady, like if I let go, she’ll vanish all over again.
She gasps against my lips, and that sound rips straight through me. I groan into her mouth, pulling her closer until there’s no space left between us, her body pressed tight against mine.
I hook an arm around her waist and lift her clean off the floor. She makes a startled sound, muffled against my lips, her fingers clutching tighter at my shirt.
“Shadow,” she breathes as I pull back just enough to meet her wide eyes.
“Logan,” I correct softly. “Use my name.”
Her chest rises and falls quick, her eyes full of heat. I carry her, her legs curling around me like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
The hallway blurs as I take the stairs two at a time, ignoring the voices, the music, the curious looks from anyone still lingering. Let them stare.
All I see is her.
I kick my bedroom door closed behind us, the sound echoing. I set her gently on the bed then shrug out of my kutte, sliding it off my shoulders and dropping it over the chair.
She sits there, cheeks flushed, lips kiss-swollen, clutching the hem of the shirt she’s wearing like armour. I can see the nervousness in her eyes, the urge to bolt.
I crouch in front of her, hands on either side of her knees, forcing her to look at me. “We can stop at any time,” I promise her. “You have all the control here.”
She gives a slight nod then lifts her shaky hands to my shoulders. She runs them up and through my hair before tugging my mouth to hers again. As we kiss, she lies back, taking me with her.
Her lips are soft, tentative at first, but the second I’m lying over her, the kiss becomes more frantic.