Chapter 41 Intrusion by Force
~ brEN ~
Something happened when I saw him. When he took me. When he held me on the couch, I almost cried. Happy tears.
I’m yours. And you’re mine. Forever.
I knew the words were true. I believed them in a way I’d never believed them from Ruin.
Thoughts of Ruin made my stomach turn, and had no place alongside thoughts of Donavyn and his love, so I pushed them away and focused instead on the warmth of Donavyn’s chest, his breath fluttering over my shoulder, and the slow, delicious thrumming in my body.
At some point the torrent of emotion eased. But neither of us was ready to return to the world. Donavyn curled me up under his arm and we talked about nothing important.
“What did you do today?” he asked.
I traced the line across his pecs and flattened my hand on that place at the center where I felt him most strongly. A thread of nerves crawled up my throat. I had to swallow it back. “The queen summoned me. I met a group of the nobles.”
Donavyn stiffened. “How did that go?”
I wanted to squirm, and I began flipping through things to tell him, ways to soften it, or reduce the sense I’d had of the noble’s attention, but he must have sensed my unease in the bond, because he caught my chin and turned my head and made me meet his eyes.
“I won’t be angry—at least, not at you,” he said softly. “I know I reacted poorly yesterday, Bren. I won’t deny that I’m afraid. But I know that you’re capable, and here for a reason. I’ll help you. Not hinder you. Tell me.”
Relief coursed through me. “I think a woman asked me if I was interested in women.”
His brows rose. “How did that come up?”
I grimaced. “I think the queen wanted to give me practice, the way it would be in Fyrehold. There was a woman there who’s been staying, she’s from Fyrehold.
The queen told her that I was gifted with dragons, and working with you, and that I’d tamed a beast. Except, they spent the rest of the afternoon talking in innuendos. ”
“Of course they did,” he muttered.
I hurried to reassure him. “They weren’t rude. And no one touched me. But they pry. And they’re very arrogant.”
He snorted. “Wait until you hear them when the king and queen aren’t present. You’d think half of them ruled Vosgaarde the way they go on.”
I shrugged. “It did give me more confidence that I understood what I’m here to do. Even though I feel uneasy around them, I understood how I could be useful.”
“That’s good,” he said, his fingers sliding thoughtlessly up and down my arm, but it was clear from his tone that he didn’t like thinking of me among those men. “Was that the whole day?”
“No. This afternoon Akhane and I worked on camouflaging again. The other training was moved to tomorrow because the Queen summoned me.”
He nodded, but his expression only darkened.
“It’s good for you to know those things for this mission, just in case.
” Then he grew thoughtful. “I want you to know, I’ve had reports from both Ronen and Voski.
Everyone agrees that you’re doing a remarkable job, picking up new skills quickly and speaking out when a change is needed.
They see your strength increasing. And your confidence.
And so do I. That’s a good thing,” he said, eyeing me from the side as if he thought I might not believe him.
“Thank you,” I murmured, suddenly more uncomfortable with his compliments than I’d been when I worried he’d be angry.
“You’re welcome. It’s true. I wouldn’t say it if it weren’t.
As I said, I believe our orders to fly will come soon.
Very soon. Tomorrow, or the next day at the latest. The king is getting antsy, and tomorrow I expect to get the message of the assessment team’s verdict.
I’m well aware how crucial you are to this mission, and I want to make sure we’ve found our balance with it.
I’ll do my best not to let my personal feelings influence my orders.
I won’t stand in your way. I’ll use my knowledge and experience to help you be more effective. ”
“How?” I blurted.
“I think it’s good that you’re learning from someone in the royal circles—someone with that perspective.
But when we’re flying, I want to give you the benefit of what I’ve learned as someone moving in those circles who isn’t highborn.
And we’ll discuss how to entice a man without making unspoken promises. ”
That thread of fear knotted in my chest again.
But Donavyn shook his head. “I won’t pretend I like it,” he growled.
“I won’t pretend I can let you go in that meat market without wanting to crush anyone who lays eyes on you.
But I do know we need you. And no one will train you better than me.
I’ve given up trying to stop this. I’ll do everything to make you more effective.
I’ll be here for you now—and later—whenever you need me.
I’ll help. Even if it’s… uncomfortable.”
I stared at him.
After a moment he frowned. “What?”
“I don’t understand how you’re real,” I said with a bemused huff. “Donavyn, you’re so good. Even your flaws are driven by love and honor… it’s not normal.”
He chuckled. “I could say the same for you.”
“What? I’m not a General and honorable and—”
“You rose from abuse and neglect and hell. Look at everything you were put through, and yet, here you are—fighting to do more. Bren, you’re inspiring.”
I was literally embarrassed, and about to argue with him, when a quiet knock sounded on the door and we both froze.
We were naked, entwined, and I wasn’t supposed to be here.
Shit!
‘Did you lock the door?’
‘I don’t remember!’
“Who is it?!” Donavyn barked at the door, pushing to his feet, one hand back to keep me in place.
“Sir? Sir, it’s Benji. I have a message for…”
He trailed off and Donavyn frowned, grabbing his leathers up from the floor and throwing my clothes to me as he yanked his up and buttoned them while he walked to the door. I scrambled to get dressed.
Donavyn stood at the door, opening it only a crack. “Benji, it’s late—”
“Sir, I have a message for her.”
I froze halfway through pulling my shirt on.
Donavyn also stilled. “Who? Speak quietly,” he muttered.
“There’s a man at the stables, Sir. He’s looking for her. He sent a message, I gave it to her yesterday, but he says she never came to his Inn and he has to speak with her—”
What the fuck? I scrambled to tuck my shirt into my leathers and get buttoned. ‘Could it be anything to do with the nobles?’
‘Not if they’re staying in an Inn,’ Donavyn pointed out.
“Benji,” he growled quietly. “Tell me why you’d come here looking for Flameborne Kearney?”
It was a moment before the boy responded, but when he did, my jaw dropped.
“I know, Sir. The stables, and you’re there sometimes and…
I haven’t told anyone. I asked Kgosi, because I wasn’t sure.
He told me that it was of the utmost importance to keep it secret and not speak of it to others. I haven’t, Sir. I swear!”
Donavyn’s head snapped towards me, his eyes wide.
I’d gotten dressed, but still had no boots or jacket on.
Donavyn turned back to Benji, reaching through the gap and pulling him in, closing the door right behind him.
Benji saw me and waved, but Donavyn jerked him back to face him and leaned down to be eye-to-eye with him.
“Benji, you’re telling me, Kgosi spoke with you about me and Bren? ”
“Yes. Well, he answered my question, and… was I not supposed to tell you that? I’m sorry, I’m still learning what’s okay to share from the dragons and—”
“No, no, that’s not it.” Donavyn clawed a hand through his hair. “That’s a great honor, Benji. A great honor to be trusted with such important information by Kgosi.”
“I know, Sir,” the boy said, blushing to his roots.
“That’s why I was so careful not to tell anyone about anything,” he said scratching the back of his neck.
“But the problem is, the man doesn’t know about that and he’s looking for her at the stable because that’s where everyone else thinks she is.
I gave him a story, but I think if she doesn’t show up soon, he’ll say something to the wrong person and then it might come out—”
“Yes, yes. You’re right. You’re right,” Donavyn said, catching my eye over Benji’s shoulder. “You did the right thing coming. But now, you run back. If anyone asks why you were here you brought a message for me, do you understand?”
Benji nodded. “I understand, only there’s one thing, Sir. I don’t know if it’s true, but…”
“What is it” Donavyn growled. “Quickly.”
Benji swallowed, then looked at me over his shoulder, then back at Donavyn. “Sir, he says he’s her father.”
Donavyn’s shocked gaze snapped to meet mine and I froze.
~ DONAVYN ~
‘I’ve asked Kgosi to alert your brothers. They’ll take him to the lounge in the barracks. Make sure you have some privacy.’
‘My father?’ Bren sent, as if I hadn’t even spoken, her tone hollow with shock as she ran down the backstairs of the building. We’d arranged to meet on the path to the stable so it could appear I had sent for her. ‘How would he even know to look for me here?’
‘Ruin,’ I sent back reluctantly, and felt the word slide into her like a blade. ‘He knew you’d come to see Ruin. He must think Ruin kept you here somehow.’
I felt her in the bond, felt the sinking conviction and despair creeping up behind it.
‘Bren, don’t—’
‘I’m not. I’m just… what do I tell him?’
I sighed and pushed out of the Officer’s building, walking towards the stables at a quick march, keeping my eyes peeled for her. ‘You tell him the truth. And we make sure he knows it’s true,’ I sent grimly.
A jab of gratitude and grief reached me from her.
‘Bren, you don’t have to deal with this alone. We’re here for you. Me, Akhane and Kgosi, your brothers. You don’t have to face him alone.’
‘I know. Thank you. I just…’
It was the smallest I’d seen her since she’d opened up and shown me her past. I wanted to curse. I wanted to find this man and plow a fist into his face and beat him senseless. Wanted to find a way to demean him the way he’d done to her.
Kgosi rumbled in my head. I didn’t answer him, but I sighed and clawed a hand through my hair that I’d forgotten to tie back.
‘Donavyn,’ my dragon growled. ‘This is exactly the moment we spoke of. Let the Creator determine what role you will play. Do not pursue violence.’
‘I won’t. I can still think about it, though,’ I snapped back.
There was a rustle in the bushes, then Bren appeared in fresh leathers, her hair tightly braided, and her chin high.
In the darkness she appeared composed and ready to fly.
But I could see how pale her face was, and feel her shaking through the bond.
God, it was so hard not to pull her to me and hold her.
‘I’m here. Your brothers are here. Whatever he wants, you don’t have to face him alone.’
She nodded once, her jaw tight, and we kept walking. At pace.
I led her straight to the barracks, accepting Ronen’s salute when he met us at the door to debrief. Just inside, Voski waited as well. We stopped in the entryway, no other Furyknights in the halls for the moment, which was a relief.
The three of us stood over Bren, who folded her arms and looked defensive though no one had said anything.
“I told him to sit in the lounge and wait, that we would bring her to him,” Ronen said tightly. Then he spoke to her directly. “You don’t have to speak with him, Bren. We can handle this for you if—”
“I need to,” she said. “It might be about mother.”
Ronen’s lips thinned. “Your mother is here, as well.”
Bren rocked back on her heels. “What would bring both of them?” she hissed. “Did he tell you anything?”
Ronen shook his head. “I didn’t pry, and he didn’t offer. But I’m happy to send Gil in to talk to him—he won’t give two shits if his questions aren’t welcome.”
Bren’s lips curled up briefly, but she shook her head. “No. No, it’s fine.”
Then she went quiet, frowning.
I wished I could touch her. “Bren, the choice is yours. Are you certain you want to speak with him?”
She bit her lip, then nodded. “Yes. I need to get past this,” she said, her eyes flickering up to mine with warmth and gratitude glowing there behind the fear.
I felt it in the bond, and shoveled my love and reassurance back to her.
“If he’s cruel, he can leave,” she continued.
“But…” she sought my eyes again. “This might be the only chance.”
Because we were leaving.
I nodded, but had to speak through clenched teeth. “Then let’s go.”