Chapter 3 #2
“You two are both… cess?” I try to understand the different roles and titles here. Henry nods and joins Avonde in front of me, looking down at her tome. “Avonde believes you are suffering from an ailment we rarely see in our kind.”
“But I am a human, not cess. I’ve never even heard of it.”
“Liv, you may believe that, but you have been asleep upstairs in that room for two years. No one has been able to reach you, heal you, or wake you up. That injury on your head was an open wound the entire time. I’m sure you don’t feel like a human, not truly.”
Static silence.
A gut-wrenching knowing washes over me.
The weakness. The uncertainty. The lapse of time. The confusion.
“You’re mistaken. Just yesterday I was at the market and…”
“You can’t remember the specifics, right? It was not real,” Henry says, his eyes earnest. He does not look happy to be delivering this information, and I am not happy to be receiving it.
I can’t accept that I truly have amnesia. Everything from back home… the village…
“But, but why do I have no memories of this life.” I motion around us. “This extraordinary life. Why do I only remember a small village, Sawyer, dirt and labor?”
Avonde speaks next. “That, we do not know. If we can diagnose you and determine the source of this malady, there is hope you will remember us all. Everything.”
“Fix me!” I slam my fist down. “If I am broken, fix me! You have magic, right? Fix me.”
She drops her head and shakes it. “We don’t even know what is wrong with you.”
I hate the way that sentence sounds. It makes me sick.
“Okay, so you’re not even sure what is wrong with me?
What if I am not Elivienne? There might be similarities but I am not her.
We must consider this. I would remember at least a fraction, a sliver of this life.
So, if you determine no illness, I can go home,” I say, a shake forming in my words.
I don’t ask it as a question because I know they would release me.
They don’t seem malicious. Confidence in my identity blooms as the two slowly nod, looking at one another.
Henry reaches forward as I stand but Avonde takes his place, pressing her fingers to my temple and locking my entire being into place as if some force was acting on my muscles.
Something immediately courses through my skeleton, grounding me.
Movement is completely isolated and an electric charge rushes through my veins.
She speaks in some foreign tongue. Her voice drawls into a distant muffle both inside my head and in my ears. Every bone and tendon in me freezes, my muscles now unable to so much as twitch as she continues chanting and moving around me.
I stay like that for a moment. No thoughts.
No movement. Nothing. I feel a bead of sweat run down my temple.
My mind feels like cotton and my heart races but I cannot move.
She looks at everything as I feel her race past my most recent memories of waking up.
The fear, the confusion, the comfort with Sawyer, my old life.
She pauses on the village, our farmhouse, exploring moments with Ma. A tear runs down my face, I know that much. In an instant, Avonde releases my mind and I stagger back, falling back down onto the couch.
Henry grabs her arm before she also falls into the table, eyes filled with shock. The healer immediately grabs her book, tracing over words with her finger as she whispers and curses to herself. Henry, brow furrowed with worry, presses a hand to her temple whispering in the same foreign language.
“You could ask before you touch me, you know,” I grind out. I continue to stay seated with no choice but to, my head spins. There is no way I’ll be able to run from here in this state. From finding strength to losing it to nausea, I have lost my upper hand.
“Did you see?” I manage to say, holding back the contents of my stomach. “I’m not from here.”
“Impossible,” she states, eyes still bewildered as she takes me in. Henry joins her over the book and I know this isn’t good.
“Did I pass,” I start, hand immediately covering my mouth as bile rises in my throat. “Did I pass your test?”
Avonde puts the book down and walks quickly to the stairs but pauses to turn back to me.
“I’m sorry my friend, please don’t hate me,” she says, gritting her teeth. Before I can protest, she taps her fingers to my forehead and I lose consciousness.
Words from an old, forgotten language bring my consciousness back. Wherever I was, it was only darkness. Perhaps the place we go when we sleep.
I peel my cheek from the velvet seat, an imprint surely leaving its mark on my face. Avonde crouches before me, her hands guiding me upright. I jump with fear at Cedric’s presence against the wall behind the tables.
His hair is tussled and his skin is flushed, yet some form of stillness has overtaken him as he stares me down. This act, though, looks painful for him. As if he can’t stand my form.
“Shh, Liv, it’s all right,” Avonde coos, helping me up slowly. My strength fails as I attempt to push away from the couch, away from him.
“Why is he here?”
“Liv, look at me,” Avonde says.
The healer looks abruptly back to Cedric, as if he said something. “I think that is the case as well, Your Highness.” He nods in return, no indication of their silent exchange.
“Perhaps this is divine punishment,” he says aloud.
“I could have attended more Temple sermons. I should have sat with her more. Maybe if I could have saved my parents, I would have had more time to find better healers. No, you are the best on the continent. Yet still, this is wrong.” He looks over to me then, sucking in a breath of narrow air.
“She’s supposed to be awake, normal. I felt her. Where did she go?”
Avonde closes the book before her with anger. “Be careful with your words, Cedric. You do not know what you speak of. Gods, even I do not.” I watch their quarrel with intent, desiring to know more of the inner relationships here.
In Lux.
“Is this how you treat your king?” he drawls and even from here I can smell wine and spirit on his tongue.
“My king needs to treat himself better,” Avonde snaps back before turning to me. “Take a moment. Do you remember anything of your life here in Lux? Any inkling of the castle, your role, your family, what Cedric is to you?”
“N-No, I don’t. Because I have never been here before. You must have me confused with someone else,” I assert. “I have a mother back home who can’t get by without me. Please. Sawyer and I need to get back home.”
“Why Sawyer?” Cedric speaks up. “A simple question really – how do you know Sawyer if you have no recollection of Lux?”