Chapter 2 #2
Guiding Melody off the path, he debated for a long moment whether the effort it took to dismount was worth the break, but his deep abdominal wound was aching something fierce with the effort to sit upright.
Daya had been gone hunting for hours and would catch up to them soon.
It would be nice not to be on the verge of blacking out when she returned.
After an ungraceful landing that had pain searing through him, he grabbed a pack and ambled over to lean against a large rock. He wanted desperately to collapse and not move until dawn, but he’d be mortified to make Daya haul his deadweight if he couldn’t make it up off the ground. Again.
Standing, then.
Pulling the water free, he guzzled its contents and took a few bites of travel bread. It didn’t taste nearly as satisfying without the lentha nectar Daya occasionally found.
Setting the food aside, he carefully stretched his injured arm.
It was crippled for the time being, every movement causing the deep gashes to tug at their bindings.
His leg was a little better but still just barely functional, forcing him to drag and throw the stiff limb when he walked.
A complete and total mess, and that didn’t even include his head or gut wound.
Daya had done well sewing up his injuries, but closing them didn’t repair the torn muscles and tendons within. At the slow rate of healing he’d endured since waking two days ago, it would be spring before he was able to lift his sword without pain.
If he was in this much pain after almost a week of healing, it was a mercy that he seemed to have slept through the first few days of his recovery.
Ember, the larger female hawk, gave a warning cry as she approached. Swooping low, she circled around him before hovering for a practiced landing on the wide front beam of Melody’s saddle. She stared at him, ruffling her feathers as she gave him a critical once-over.
“Did she send you to check on me?”
The pair of winged hunters followed Daya everywhere, tracking her movements from high above or riding her padded shoulder. They occasionally disappeared for a while but would coalesce whenever she called for them. Unusual behavior for hawks, he was pretty certain.
Then again, with his mind a jumble of flashing images he couldn’t quite grasp, intense emotional blasts, and aggravating darkness, who knew? Maybe the pair of shadow guardians were acting perfectly natural.
Ember gave a squawk he couldn’t interpret.
Fantastic, now I’m talking to the birds. Raiden winced as he shifted his weight. “You can tell her I’m fine. I’ve been worse… I think.”
Not knowing wore on him every moment he was awake. An incessant worry filled his gut and wouldn’t relent no matter how much he tried to relax. Was it just because his mind had been stolen? Or something more?
When he’d bathed in the stream the day before, he’d been sickened by the amount of blood that had come off him.
He’d killed more than just the one person who’d attacked him when he’d protected Daya.
Likely three or four others at close range.
How he knew the ratio between the gore and body count was as horrifying as it was mysterious.
Possibly worse, though, was the fact that he’d found no recognition when he looked into the reflection of his own green eyes. He was a complete stranger to himself.
The only thing he had of reference, besides a myriad of weapons, was a strange coin-like medallion. Engraved with a snake, it took on an ominous weight in his palm when he’d held it to examine it. The back of it was shaped oddly, as if it was half of a larger piece.
Unlike some of his weapons, it didn’t produce any wisps of memory.
Yet he’d pulled it out of a hidden pocket.
He needed to ask Daya if the symbol meant anything to her.
Maybe it was simply a form of currency, and he was being overly sensitive about the mysterious piece, desperate for something—anything—to give him an indication of who and what he was.
The glint of metal caught his eye, and he freed a sharp knife from the pack. Hefting it brought no memories to the surface. It felt comfortable in his hand, familiar to his body, if not to his mind. He was certain his injured arm was his dominant side, yet the blade felt natural in both hands.
Being ambidextrous with a weapon wasn’t normal, though, was it?
Mesmerized, he twisted and turned it back and forth. If he focused too hard on the action, he fumbled and dropped the knife. Closing his eyes and centering himself brought more fluid movements, letting him drift into a trance-like state where his muscles could dictate the practice.
One thing became increasingly clear. He’d spent a great deal of time working with blades during his life.
The thud of deadweight hitting the ground rocked through him.
One body dropped in death, and he paused to suck in a deep breath. The muffled cry of an innocent spurred him on, though his arm was coated in blood.
“Behind you!” His partner’s sharp warning had him spinning around to engage another attacker.
Whipping around, Raiden grabbed the body coming at him and wrenched it close, bringing his knife up to his opponent’s neck.
Sharp screeching split his eardrums, reverberating through him with the force of a punch.
Soft clothing mixed with worn leather felt wrong to his fingers, as did the stillness of the person he held.
His sense of smell kicked in, bringing him lentha nectar and forest green as his vision blurred and resettled.
Daya’s dark hair under his nose brought him fully out of the memory, letting him see who was actually in front of him.
“Daya! Are you okay?” Hands and heart racing, he chucked the knife far away from him. “What is wrong with me?”
Daya stepped away from him, concern more than fear etching her face. Ereven circled around her while Ember landed close to him with a reprimanding shriek.
“I’m fine.” Barely a hint of sound accompanied the words as Daya reached a hand to touch her throat, where a small scratch screamed his carelessness.
His stomach rolled at the sight of her blood welling, nausea threatening him as he began to shake. He could have hurt her, killed her. Another instant, and she would have been gone.
“Zevat!” he cursed vehemently.
He couldn’t be trusted to protect those with him, not even from himself. Injured or not, he’d never acted less honorably.
“Raiden—”
“No! Stay away from me.” He held up his hand to block her forward movement. “I’m not safe to be around.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“If Ereven hadn’t screeched when he did, I would have killed you, Daya. I’m not even close to trustworthy right now. You should leave me. I’m too dangerous.”
Eyes hardening, she stalked closer and shoved his arm down when he tried to stop her. Placing a hand on the side of his face, she drew his full attention to her.
“That’s my choice, not yours. Don’t try to take it from me again.”
“Daya—”
“You knew it was Ereven, not Ember, who came at you. Some of your senses were working fine. Tell me what happened.”
“A memory, I guess.” His body continued to shake as the adrenaline ebbed and he leaned back against the rock for support.
Her eyebrows lowered in a frown. “The sound of me dropping the deer to the ground triggered you?”
Deer… he glanced around her to see that she had, in fact, dropped an animal to the ground nearby.
“It sounded like a body dropping, and then…” He’d imagined a combat scene, tried to kill her. Thank the stars he’d failed.
Daya’s fingers stroked his face in a gentle caress, bringing his focus back to her. “Did you hear me? I said we’ll find a way to manage. It’s inevitable that things will trigger your memories.”
“It’s not. I should leave you.” It was best for her, the only honorable thing he could do.
“No. And I’ve had enough of you trying that already.”
“Then take the weapons,” he growled in frustration. “That’s the only way this works. That I’ll stay.”
Daya raised her brow in amusement. “You really think you’re up to an escape attempt?”
He wouldn’t make it an hour on his own, let alone a day, and they both knew it. Not without a horse and harboring debilitating injuries. But that was beside the point.
“I’m serious. I don’t want them near me, Daya. I’ll not risk you. Not now, not ever.”
Daya’s dark eyes were still staring into his soul, disagreement with his request giving way to his plea. “Alright. For now.”
For good. His mind had deserted him, left him with only his most basic and dangerous instincts. He couldn’t tell the difference between Daya and an attacker, and he had moved without thought or pause to kill.
What kind of violent creature am I?