Chapter 12 Darian
Darian
I’ve been staying close.
Not too close. Just… near enough.
Helpful when asked. Silent when not. Careful not to intrude.
It’s a careful dance I’ve been performing, and I’m exhausted.
Malrik notices.
Fuck.
We’re walking through the village when he stops and turns to face me.
“You’ve been circling her like you’re afraid to get too close,” he says. “We need to talk about that.”
I tense immediately. “I’m not—”
“You are.” His tone is matter-of-fact. “And it’s not helping either of you.”
I don’t have a response to that.
He gestures for me to follow. We walk slowly through the square.
“I need to know nobody followed you when you came here,” Malrik says without preamble.
My shoulders stiffen. “Nobody followed me.”
“You’re certain?”
“Yes.”
He studies me for a long moment. “Good. Because I had you watched from the moment you left that arena.”
My breath catches. “You—what?”
“You attacked Kaia,” Malrik says calmly. “You were imprisoned. Alenya Virath visited you in that cell—I know what she offered you. I know you escaped. I know you went back to them.”
The words hit like stones.
“And yet you’re here,” Malrik continues. “So I need to know why.”
I open my mouth to speak, but then I see her.
Kaia.
Walking with Revna on the far side of the square. Her shadows move with her like a quiet escort. People notice her immediately—and why wouldn’t they? Even still healing, she’s breathtaking.
My chest tightens.
I force myself to look away. Focus on Malrik.
It doesn’t work.
She glances over.
Our eyes meet for half a second.
There’s something in her gaze—soft, unguarded. Almost like…
No.
I look away quickly, heart hammering.
I’m imagining it. I have to be.
Malrik glances between us. Says nothing. But I know he noticed.
A little boy approaches her. I can’t hear what he says, but I see her hesitate. Glance at Revna.
And then her wings flare.
Light and shadow ripple softly behind her—just the edges at first, tentative.
I saw them once before. In the arena. When I attacked her.
But I didn’t see them. Not really. Not like this.
The village stops. Stares.
And then she lets them sprawl out fully.
Massive. Breathtaking. Hers.
And I—
I can’t breathe.
Something in my chest pulls—sharp, involuntary, undeniable.
My shadows writhe as light magic flickers beneath my skin in response.
Kaia’s wings fold back. She waves to the boy, smiling, and she and Revna start walking again—toward the far edge of the village.
“As I was saying,” Malrik continues, voice steady. “I need to know if I can trust you. Callum betrayed us. Led us into a trap. Kaia thinks Seren’s been captured—that’s why she can’t sit still and heal.”
I nod, trying to focus on his words.
We keep walking.
Malrik’s still talking—something about trust, about the group’s dynamics, about what happened after the academy—but the words blur.
My feet keep moving.
And then Malrik stops.
I take two more steps before I realize he’s not beside me anymore.
I turn back. He’s watching me with that sharp, assessing focus.
“You’re leading us,” he says quietly.
I blink. “What?”
“You’ve been following her for the last three minutes. I don’t think you’ve noticed.”
My breath stutters. I glance around—and realize we’ve drifted in the exact direction Kaia and Revna walked.
Away from the square. Toward the edge of the village.
“I didn’t—”
“You did.” Malrik’s tone isn’t angry. Just observational. “Your feet made the choice before your brain caught up.”
He pauses. “Now answer the question. Why are you here?”
I swallow. Force myself to meet his eyes.
“I felt her,” I say quietly.
Malrik waits.
“When Kieran forced the bond, maybe even before, if I’m being honest with myself,” I continue, the words dragging out of me like broken glass. “I felt everything. Every emotion. Every…” I stop. Can’t finish.
“Every intimate moment,” Malrik says.
I flinch. “Yes.”
“And you stayed with Alekir anyway.”
“I thought—” My voice cracks. “I thought she’d chosen. That she’d never choose me. That I was better off…”
“Better off with the man who manipulated you?” Malrik’s voice is sharp now. “Who used you as a weapon against the one person your power was meant to protect?”
The words hit too close.
“I didn’t know what else to do,” I whisper. “I had nowhere else to go.”
Malrik gestures toward a quieter spot—still within sight of where Kaia and Revna are walking. We move there, and I force myself to keep my eyes off her.
Malrik leans against a post, arms crossed, studying me.
“And now?” he asks.
“Now I’m here.” I force myself to hold his gaze. “Because I felt her again. Because all I can do is feel her. When she…” I stop. Breathe. “When she needed me.”
“And if she doesn’t need you?” Malrik asks. “If she chooses someone else? If she never forgives you for what you did?”
The question settles like a weight in my chest.
“I’m still here,” I say quietly. “Not because I think I deserve her. Not because I think she owes me anything. But because leaving her again would kill me.”
Malrik studies me for a long moment.
“She doesn’t trust easily. You already know that. She’s been abandoned, controlled, and manipulated by people who were supposed to protect her.”
He pauses. Holds my gaze.
“You were one of them.”
I flinch.
He doesn’t soften it. “But she let you back in. That means something. Don’t waste it by drowning in guilt.”
I try to breathe. It comes out unsteady.
“I don’t know how to be around her without—” I stop. Can’t finish.
“Without what?” Malrik asks.
“Without feeling like I’m… taking something I don’t deserve.”
Malrik’s voice is calm. Precise. “You’re not taking anything. She’s offering it. Learn the difference.”
I want to argue. Want to tell him he’s wrong.
But the words won’t come.
“How do I make this right?” I ask quietly.
Malrik doesn’t answer immediately. Lets the question sit between us.
“You can’t undo what happened. That’s not what she needs.”
My chest tightens. “Then what does she need?”
He considers me carefully. “Consistency. Presence. Proof that you’re choosing to stay—not because you owe her, but because you want to.”
I nod knowing he’s right.
Malrik straightens. His tone shifts—tactical, strategic.
“She needs you to be steady. Not perfect. Steady.”
I force myself to meet his eyes.
“She needs you to show up without apology or self-flagellation,” he continues. “She needs you to stop treating yourself like the enemy—because if you do, she will too.”
His eyes narrow.
“And for fuck’s sake, stop looking at her like you’re waiting for permission to exist near her.”
The words settle like stones in my chest.
I look back toward where she was.
In the distance, I can just barely see her—sitting on a bench with Revna. Talking. Her shadows gathered around her.
Movement catches my eye—new shadows drifting toward her from the edges of the square. Hesitant. Curious.
They settle near her feet.
Something in my chest tightens.
She glances over.
Our eyes meet again.
I don’t look away this time.
Something in me steadies.
Something in me breaks.
The bond hums between us—quiet, inevitable, and absolutely undeniable.
Malrik watches the entire exchange. When I finally manage to tear my gaze away, he’s watching me with that same sharp focus.
“That’s what she needs,” he says quietly. “Exactly that.”
I don’t respond.
Can’t respond.
The pull is too strong. Too real.
Malrik turns to leave, pauses. “You’re staying, Darian. Stop fighting it.”
He walks away, leaving me standing there—caught between guilt and inevitability, between what I think I deserve and what I can’t stop wanting.
I look back toward Kaia.
She’s still watching.
And this time, I don’t look away.