Chapter 6
L eaves in shades of orange and maroon drifted toward the ground as the cool breeze whipped through my loose hair and the branches of the trees. The ground was a soft mush from the morning dew that had not yet dried up; the sun hiding behind a sea of dark gray clouds. It was an awful day to be outdoors, but we didn’t have much choice in the matter. To practice magic inside the city gates would be asking to get hassled by the guards. Besides, I had promised Kallistra I wouldn’t use my magic in front of others if I could avoid it. Alandris was now the exception to the rule.
“You derive your magic from nature, I presume?” he questioned as we made our way toward a clearing in the forest just outside of Fernfallow.
I shook my head. “No, I don’t. ”
He blinked a few times, twisting his mouth. “You don’t wear that stone as a conduit?” He pointed to the necklace dangling over my chest.
I paused, unsure of how to respond. To lie or to tell the truth. So much of my life seemed to be a lie these days. The ability to wield magic came from only two sources. Most commonly, the innate power to tap into the veins of magic occurring in the natural world, using items that could act as conduits. Or less frequently, as a blessing bestowed by the Gods. I had to pick one, even if neither explained my situation perfectly. Not that I fully understood my situation to begin with. I was a Saintess, yes, but I’d never communed with God.
“My power is a gift from God,” I settled on. “Our God. My people’s God, that is. I don’t mean to disrespect any beliefs you hold. I’ve traveled some time now, so I realize there are other… Gods.”
“It’s fine, Nairu. I’m not all that faithful.”
“Uh, I wear the stone… because we follow a lesser-known God, and it is easier to claim the power as my own than answer the onslaught of questions from those we encounter.”
A truth and a lie. Kallistra had instructed me never to speak of our God to others. She’d crafted the necklace herself and told me to wear it so that I wouldn’t draw attention to myself in the case I needed to utilize my magic. And I’d managed to avoid attention successfully until now. Alandris was to be my teacher, so of course he would inquire about the source of my magic. Surely, Kallistra had known as much. So, why allow it? Pity? Desperation?
Alandris hummed to himself, and a smirk rose to his lips. “I am sorry to pester you with my onslaught of questions.”
“T-that isn’t what I meant!”
“I only mean to joke with you, Nairu. No need to get all flustered.”
A shameful heat rose to my cheeks. “I’m not used to it.”
“I had garnered as much. Your companion is quite the serious character.” Alandris lifted his hand, showing off a sapphire gemstone set inside an ornate silver ring. “I utilize a conduit, but I should be able to teach you just as well. All manner of Mages come to the Consortium, and we all learn together from the same instructors. The basis of magic is uniform, God gifted or not.”
I nibbled at my lip. “I am not very well practiced. I’ve tried a few spells with Kallistra, but she can’t wield magic herself, so I can’t say we’ve accomplished much.”
“If you’ve a genuine interest in magic, you should consider joining the Mages Consortium after our job! You’d be amazed by the place—I was the first time I arrived. It was stunning. A giant castle on the edge of a cliff, overlooking the sea. Breathtaking, honestly.” His eyes crinkled as he spoke, a smile on his face as he rambled. “Out there on the island, it’s like an escape from reality. It’s our own little paradise. No one cares who you are or where you’ve come from. The only thing that matters is the magic. ”
“Perhaps…” I frowned. “In another life, that may have been a dream of mine.”
Alandris’ smile fell from his face, aware he’d hit a nerve. I hadn’t been able to hide it from my face. In a low voice, he spoke. “I’m sorry. I’m not aware of your circumstances. I got a bit carried away with my words, as I often do.”
I waved my hands in front of myself. “No, no. Don’t apologize. I think it sounds wonderful there.”
“Well, I—thank you. I suppose we should get started.” Alandris stood in front of me, his arms crossed in waiting. “By all means, please demonstrate your magic.”
“Like I mentioned, I really don’t know—”
“I won’t judge you for your skill level. I only wish to discern your strengths.” Alandris held out his hand. “Go on.”
I obliged, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. Shakily exhaling, I recalled the times I’d practiced with Kallistra. I’d allowed the power to flow through me, become one with me, taking over a part of my very essence. It had been so intense, so volatile, I’d had to pull back and separate the magic. In the end, all I’d managed to do was conjure a tiny bird. This time had to be different, so I could prove my worth as a student.
Unlike my last attempt, I let the magic flow freely, without attempting to hold it at bay. I felt it rush down my arm with such violence that I could’ve sworn it tore my flesh apart. It was raw. Painful. I opened my eyes, wincing as the magic culminated in my palm, leaving trails of black, which formed like veins down my skin. As I sucked in another labored breath, it appeared there. A bird, much larger this time, but still with no corporeal form, only swirling darkness.
I fell to my knees, struggling to hold the apparition there for as long as possible. Just a bit longer. A second more. My head was swimming. Everything went white. Only when a hand pulled me back by the shoulder and slowly eased my body to the ground did I finally regain my awareness. My vision returned, and I spun to see Alandris staring at me with a furrowed brow.
“Do you typically almost faint?” He kept eying me up and down, looking between my hand and face.
“I told you, I’m not very good,” I mumbled, brushing off my skirt. In truth, I’d never pushed myself so far.
Alandris stood from the ground and offered me a hand up. “I have a number of questions, but first, are you alright? You seemed to be in pain. I thought to stop you sooner, but…”
I took his hand and gave a reassuring smile. “I’m alright. I just pushed too far, that’s all.” Even after I was safely on my feet, his grip lingered there as if I might collapse at any moment. “I promise.”
With that, he pulled away and brought his hand to his chin. “I’ve never seen magic behave in such a manner. To manifest so potently for such a simple conjuration is indeed strange. Has that happened before?”
“No. Though it never feels quite right to tap into my power, it hasn’t done that.”
“I’m not sure how it should feel. It’s different for everyone, but it certainly shouldn’t feel bad. Strenuous, maybe, but only painful if you were to push yourself far beyond your limits.” He looked away in thought. “And you shouldn’t be anywhere near your limit from one spell, even as a novice.”
I let out a breathy laugh. “I’m a lost cause, then, aren’t I?”
“Oh, of course not!” He brought his hand forward and snapped his fingers. In his palm appeared a small, spiraling ball of fire. “It should be this easy. An extension of yourself.”
The ball continued to grow larger and larger, spinning faster and faster until it was nearly the size of a boulder. With another snap, it was gone, as if it’d never been there at all. His skin was unburned, and he showed no signs of fatigue. Utilizing his magic came second nature to him. It did not punish him for tapping into it as mine did. His coexisted with him, an essential part of his being.
“Could I try something?” he asked.
“Sure?” I nodded, though my voice betrayed my hesitancy.
Alandris held out his hand once more, this time as an invitation. “I’d like to see if I can use my magic to help ease you through casting the spell. It is common practice between more advanced Mages and novices attempting stronger spells. This circumstance may prove similar. If your own magic tries to steal too much from you, for whatever reason that is, it is possible mine may be able to act as a supplement.”
I paused a moment before taking his hand in mine. It was still warm, almost hot, as if the flames still lingered just below his skin, threatening to burst forth. The heat of his hand was surprisingly comforting against the coldness of my own. Instead of wanting to pull away, as I should have, I simply melted into him, intertwining our fingers and waiting for his next instruction.
“When you are ready, go ahead and try to conjure the bird once more.”
After a moment of preparation and another deep breath, I reached inside myself and drew upon my power once more. I pictured the bird gliding through the sky, bobbing in and out of the clouds unfettered. It spread its wings, now much larger, a trail of shadow and smoke left in its wake. A flame shot forth from the bird’s beak, lighting up the dreary sky as it let out a deafening caw. When I opened my eyes, the very same bird was perched there on the ground beside us, looking up at me in wait.
“See?” Alandris chuckled. “You’re a natural. That was quite an impressive display, commanding the bird.”
My mouth dropped, my eyes wide. “What? I wasn’t imagining that entire thing?”
“Of course not. However,” he gently pulled away his hand, “you are definitely consuming too much power to cast such a spell… and by result, mine.” He cracked his fingers and stared into his palm. The same inky black trails that had appeared on my arm had appeared in his hand, slowly fading.
“I’m so sorry,” I sucked in a breath, reaching out to him before quickly pulling away and looking down at my feet. “Are you hurt?”
Alandris placed a hand on my shoulder, and I forced myself to meet his gaze, shoving down the guilt swimming in my chest. “I am not injured; you need not worry. With time, you will improve in great measures. I am sure of that.” Bringing a finger to his chin, he leaned back on his heels. “Until then, I will act as your personal power dampener of sorts.”
“My—”
“Ah, don’t look so concerned. I merely intend to assist you as I did just now until you are strong enough to go it alone.” He smiled confidently. “It is a long trek to where we are headed, so if you are willing to sacrifice some of your rest time, we should be able to practice on the road. I am certain you will master it by the time we arrive.”
“I am!” I answered too quickly. “I am willing. I don’t want to be a burden on this job.”
“I doubt your friend sees you that way. Nor do I.”
I stared off into the distance. There was that word again. Friend. Kallistra had been generous to allow me to train my magic with a near stranger, not to mention taking the job in the first place. I was struggling to remember that beneath her mantle of Keeper, she was my friend. Especially when she wore that mantle so proudly lately. Kallistra’s role was to protect me at all costs and to help me along the pilgrimage to ‘master’ my power. To save our people. Everything else came secondary or not at all, friendship included.
“Nairu?” Alandris’ voice startled me back to awareness.
“Yes, sorry. Well, regardless. I’d like to be of as much help as possible.” I returned my gaze to him, kicking myself for fumbling my words, and offered my appreciation. “Thank you for doing this. ”
“It is my pleasure.” Alandris turned around, alerted by the sounds of branches crunching beneath booted feet from behind them. “They must have heard us speaking of them.”
Kallistra and Zorinna had come into view in the clearing, their expressions blank. “How did it go?” Kallistra questioned Alandris, her eyes fixed only on me, scanning up and down.
I shot a pleading look to Alandris, praying he wouldn’t tell Kallistra about the pain I’d felt utilizing my magic. Or the fact it had left temporary marks. Or the fact I’d almost fallen unconscious. I noticed him look at me out of the corner of his eye before turning his attention back to Kallistra.
“It went great!” Alandris beamed. “Nairu is a natural talent. She only needs a bit of fine tuning, and she will be well on her way to surpassing me.”
“Very humble you are,” Zorinna snorted, rolling her eyes.
“Humble?” Kallistra cocked her head.
“Alandris is working toward the title of Arch Magus. You have chosen a fine teacher, but don’t expect her to best him in battle anytime soon.”
“Oh?” Kallistra flashed a sly smile. “I’m glad to know we have someone so capable on our side, but to battle Nairu, he’d have to get through me.”
“Kalli…” I whined. I was glad the conversation had turned away from my training, but I didn’t want to see a spar.
Alandris held up both hands and laughed. “I surrender. I wouldn’t want to be on the opposite end of one of your many, many knives. ”
“Noticed those, did you?”
“How could I not?” Alandris glanced between Zorinna and Kallistra. “Now, don’t keep us in suspense. Did you manage to find another helping hand to join us?”
“Oh, you’re going to love this,” Zorinna snickered. “Just wait until you meet him. He decided to wait back at the inn.”
Alandris raised a brow. “That is rather ominous, you know. Nevertheless, lead the way.”
I waited until Kallistra and Zorinna were some ways ahead before I pulled Alandris by the sleeve. In a low tone, I spoke, “Thank you for not mentioning what happened to Kalli.”
Alandris slowed his pace to match mine. “There is no need to thank me. I get the sense that Kallistra doesn’t fully trust me. It would be unwise to speak of what happened today while you were under my care, lest she blame me.”
“Right…”
“That is not to say I wouldn’t have kept your secret regardless,” he added. “Though I hope you will eventually trust me enough to tell me more about your magic.”
So, he hadn’t fully believed me. The truth and the lie. And yet, he hadn’t pressed me for information and had let me train with him, knowing I was withholding information. For that, I was thankful. Despite that, Kallistra’s words were ringing in the back of my head. Do not trust him.
“Come on, keep up the pace!” Zorinna shouted from ahead of us. “Don’t tell me you’re tired already! ”
“Not a chance!” Alandris yelled back, taking off after the two in front, leaving me without the opportunity to respond.
I stumbled over my feet, catching up to them.