CHAPTER 34 #2
Later that afternoon, I found myself pushing with every ounce of strength I possessed, my muscles straining as I fought to maneuver the king-sized mattress up the final few steps to Jaxon's bedroom. My arms trembled with the effort, sweat beading on my forehead despite the cool air conditioning.
Jaxon, on the other side, pulled with equal determination, his biceps flexing beneath his sweat-dampened T-shirt in a way that would have been distracting if I hadn't been so focused on not launching the massive thing back down the stairs.
The moment most of the mattress cleared the top step, it settled onto the landing with a heavy thump, the weight shifting away from my exhausted arms. I practically collapsed onto the stairs, chest heaving as I dipped forward, gulping in lungfuls of air.
I made a mental note: mattresses are heavier than they look.
Looking far less winded, Jaxon grinned as he dragged the mattress the rest of the way into the bedroom. Then he leaned through the doorway to peer at my dramatically slumped form. "Do I need to carry you up the rest of the way too?" he teased, his eyes sparkling with mirth.
"Maybe…" I mumbled under my breath, a wry smile tugging at the corners of my mouth despite my exhaustion.
With a dramatic sigh, I hauled myself upright and trudged into the bedroom. Together, we maneuvered the mattress onto the waiting bed frame, a beautiful piece we'd spent hours assembling the day before, complete with only one minor argument about which screws went where.
Jaxon had picked up the mattress earlier that day, enlisting my help to wrestle it up the stairs after my conversation with Connor.
The space was coming together piece by piece, room by room, transforming from the defiled shell it had been after the break-in into something that was starting to feel like home.
With a final shove, the mattress settled into place with a satisfying whoosh of air, and we both collapsed onto our backs, sinking into the plush surface. Laughter bubbled up from our chests, mingling with the sound of our labored breathing.
The comfort was immediate. It was worth every bit of the struggle to get it up here.
"I don't care if we ever end up moving," Jaxon declared between breaths, his arm thrown across his forehead. "This bed is staying right here. We can just buy another one."
My laughter died in my throat after a not-so-subtle choking sound.
My eyes widened as I turned to stare at Jaxon, my heart skipping a beat. He remained focused on the ceiling, chest rising and falling from exertion, but sensing my gaze, he finally shifted to meet my eyes. His amused expression faltered at the shock written across my face.
"What?" he asked, confusion etched into his features.
"You said 'if we move'…" I sat up slowly, my mind reeling. "Jax, that's way too soon. We've only been together a few weeks."
Jaxon's lips curved into a soft smile as he sat up, scooting closer. His hands found mine, calloused fingers enclosing them in a gentle, reassuring grip that sent warmth spreading through my chest.
"I didn't mean to say it like that," he began, his voice low and earnest, blue eyes holding mine. "But now that it's out there, I don't want to take it back."
My breath caught.
"After everything we've been through," he continued, his thumb tracing circles on the back of my hand, "the way my feelings for you have grown stronger with each passing day…
Anna, I would love nothing more than to wake up next to you every morning.
Not just while Connor's home or while we're rebuilding the cabin, but always. "
He leaned in, capturing my lips in a tender kiss that made my toes curl. When he pulled back, his forehead rested against mine. "Move in with me. Make this our home."
Our home. The idea resonated with me: He wants this to be our home.
My heart raced, a mix of excitement and fear warring inside me. This was fast. So fast. But it also felt… right. Being with Jaxon felt right in a way nothing with Daniel ever had.
"Jaxon," I said softly, pulling back enough to meet his eyes. "First off, you've been waking up next to me every day for over three weeks now."
His lips twitched. "True. But you're staying in Connor's guest room. I'm staying in Connor's other guest room. We're sneaking around like teenagers."
I couldn't help but smile—he was right. We'd been taking turns staying in each other's rooms, trying to respect Connor's house even though he'd made it clear he was fine with our relationship.
"And secondly…" I hesitated, feeling heat creep up my neck as I gathered courage to voice what had been on my mind. "You're talking about moving in together, making this huge commitment, but…"
I pushed myself to just say it, to be honest.
I took a breath. "But sometimes I feel like you're still holding back. Like you're afraid to fully let me in. We've been intimate, yes, but there are moments when I catch you pulling away, shutting down when things get too emotional."
Jaxon's expression shifted, understanding and something resembling guilt flickering across his features. He reached up, cupping my cheek, thumb tracing the delicate curve of my cheekbone.
"You're right," he admitted quietly. "I have been holding back in some ways. Not physically—God, Anna, you have no idea how much I want you, how hard it's been to keep my hands off you when we're together."
Heat pooled low in my belly, but I stayed focused on his words.
"But emotionally," he continued, his voice rougher now, "I've been terrified. Terrified of feeling so much for you. Terrified of losing you the way I lost Nikki. Terrified that if I let myself fully fall, fully commit, something will happen and I'll be destroyed all over again."
Tears pricked at my eyes as I covered his hand with mine, holding it against my cheek.
"I'm scared too," I whispered. "After Daniel, after everything…
trusting someone, letting someone this close—it terrifies me.
But Jax, you're not Daniel. And I'm not Nikki.
What we have is ours, something completely different. "
"I know," he said, voice thick with emotion. "And I don't want to waste another second being afraid. I don't want to hold back anymore. I want to build a life with you, Anna. A real life. Here, in this cabin we're rebuilding together."
He drew in a deep breath, gaze never leaving mine. "I want to wake up next to you every morning and fall asleep with you every night. I want to argue about where to put furniture and what color to paint the walls. I want to build something permanent, something that's ours."
My heart swelled at his words, the sincerity and depth of his emotion washing over me like a warm, comforting embrace. "I want that too," I murmured, leaning into his touch. "More than I thought I'd ever want anything again."
"So move in with me," he said again, more confident this time. "Officially. Make this our home. I know it's fast, and I know we're both still healing, but Anna—I don't want to wait to start our life together."
"Yes. I'll move in with you."
The smile that broke across Jaxon's face was brilliant, transforming his features from serious and intense to boyish and joyful. "Yeah?"
"Yeah," I confirmed, laughing as he pulled me into his arms, rolling us over on the mattress until I was beneath him, his weight pressing me into the plush surface.
"We should probably test out this new bed properly," he murmured against my lips, voice dropping to that low, rough tone that always made my pulse race. "Break it in, so to speak."
Heat surged through me at his words, at the promise in his eyes. "I think that's an excellent idea," I said, hands already sliding under his shirt, desperate to feel his skin against mine.
With a low growl, Jaxon claimed my lips in a searing kiss that stole my breath. His tongue swept against mine, possessive and demanding, making me moan. His hands trailed fire down my sides, even through the fabric, before finding the hem and tugging it upward.
I lifted my arms, letting him pull the shirt over my head, and felt his sharp intake of breath at the black lace bra I wore beneath. The way he looked at me, like I was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, made me feel powerful, desired, alive in a way I never had with Daniel.
"God, Anna," he breathed, eyes dark with want as they roamed over me. "You're so fucking beautiful."
Heat rose to my cheeks, but I held his gaze. "Your turn," I said, tugging at his shirt.
He grinned, sitting back on his heels, peeling it off in one smooth motion. The muscles of his chest and abs flexed enticingly, and I couldn't resist running my hands over the hard planes of his stomach, feeling them shift under my touch.
"I've been wanting to do this all day," Jax murmured, voice rough as he leaned down, pressing kisses along my collarbone. "Watching you work, seeing you excited about your new business… you have no idea how sexy you are when you're passionate about something."
His mouth traveled lower, hot lips tracing the space between my breasts. I arched into him, fingers threading into his hair. "Jax," I breathed, my need making my voice tremble.
"I love hearing you say my name like that," he murmured against my skin, hands reaching around to unhook my bra with practiced ease. He slid the straps down my arms slowly, eyes never leaving mine as he bared me completely.
The cool air brushed my heated skin, making my nipples tighten until his warm mouth found them, lips sucking gently. Pleasure shot through me, making me gasp and arch off the bed.
"That's it, baby," he encouraged, cupping my other breast, thumb brushing over the sensitive tip. "Let me hear you."
My fingers clutched his hair as he lavished attention on my breasts, alternating between soft licks and firmer suction that had me squirming beneath him. Each touch sent waves of heat pooling between my thighs.
"Jax, please," I whimpered, hips lifting involuntarily, seeking friction.
He smiled against my skin, pressing one last kiss to my sternum before moving to the button of my jeans. "Patience," he teased, even as his fingers worked to remove them.
"Says the man who's been undressing me since we got on this bed," I shot back, breathless.
His laugh was low, deep, and thrilling. "Fair point."
In moments, my jeans and panties were gone. He sat back, eyes roaming my naked body with such hunger it felt like a physical caress.
Jaxon rose smoothly, stripping jeans and boxers in one fluid motion. Fully hard, every inch of him—muscle, strength, raw masculinity—made my mouth go dry.
He climbed back onto the bed, positioning himself between my thighs.
The heat of his body pressed against mine, and I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him down for a deep, searing kiss.
I felt him hard and ready, pressing insistently against my core, and I shifted my hips, hungry for more contact.
"Anna," he groaned against my mouth, his control clearly fraying. "Tell me you want this. Tell me you're sure."
"I'm sure," I assured him, my legs wrapping around his waist. "I want you, Jax. I want this. I want us."
His hand slid between our bodies, fingers finding my slick heat and stroking gently. I gasped at the contact, my hips rolling into his touch as he explored, finding the bundle of nerves that made pleasure spike sharp and bright.
"So wet for me," he murmured appreciatively, his fingers circling, teasing, building the tension higher. "Always so perfect."
When he finally positioned himself at my entrance, we both paused, our eyes locked. This felt significant somehow. Not just sex, but a claiming, a commitment. The physical manifestation of the promises we'd just made.
He breathed deeply, then slowly pushed inside, filling me completely. We both groaned at the sensation. The stretch, the fullness. The perfect fit of our bodies together was overwhelming in the best possible way.
"Okay?" he asked, his voice strained with the effort of holding still.
"More than okay," I assured him, my hands sliding down to grip his hips, urging him forward. "Perfect."
He began to move then, long, slow strokes that had us both gasping. The rhythm built gradually, our bodies finding perfect synchronization as we moved together. Each thrust sent pleasure cascading through me, building higher and higher.
His mouth found mine again, swallowing my moans as his pace quickened. One of his hands slid between us, fingers circling that sensitive spot in time with his movements.
"Come for me, Anna," he urged, his voice rough and commanding. "Let me feel you."
The combination of his words, his touch, and the deep, filling strokes—it was too much. The tension coiled impossibly tight before shattering in waves of pleasure that had me crying out his name, my body clenching around him.
"Fuck," Jaxon groaned, his rhythm faltering as my orgasm triggered his own. He thrust deep once, twice more, before burying himself inside me with a guttural sound, his body shuddering in release.
For long moments afterward, we lay tangled together, hearts racing, breaths mingling, neither of us willing to break the connection. The afternoon sun painted patterns across our sweat-slicked skin, and I'd never felt more content, more complete.
Finally, Jaxon shifted, carefully withdrawing before rolling onto his side and pulling me back against his chest. His arms wrapped around my waist, holding me close as our bodies fit together like two puzzle pieces designed specifically for each other.
He nuzzled into the crook of my neck, pressing soft kisses to my shoulder, my throat, anywhere he could reach.
"Welcome home," he murmured against my skin, and I could hear the smile in his voice.
I turned my head, pressing a tender kiss to his jawline. "Home," I repeated softly, testing the word. It felt right. It felt true.
This was home. He was home.
For the first time in longer than I could remember, I wasn't running from something. I was running toward something: a future I was choosing, a man who appreciated me, a life I was building with my own hands.
"So," Jaxon said after a comfortable silence, his fingers tracing lazy patterns across my stomach, making me shiver, "when do you want to officially move your stuff over? We should probably tell Connor too."
I laughed, the sound bright and happy in the quiet room. "I think Connor already knows we're basically living together. But yes, we should make it official. Maybe this weekend? I don't have that much."
I turned in his arms, wanting to see his face. His eyes were soft, unguarded, full of love and contentment that mirrored everything I felt.
And wrapped in his arms, in our new bed, in the cabin we were rebuilding from the ruin, I believed in our future with absolute certainty.