Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
Michael
The nightingales were singing, and the lights that made walking in the backyard possible were all glowing softly.
I froze as my mind raced and thought maybe I was wrong about being safe. Maybe some staff member might look up—or some nosy neighbor with binoculars as we were in London.
I swallowed and held still. “Maybe we should go into our bedroom and close the door in case someone wants to spy on us.”
“Relax.” She walked to the ledge and dropped her bra, making my heart thunder. “Let’s live dangerously.”
Half of me wanted to protect her and bring her inside. The other half of me was hooked by her daring. So I unbuttoned my shirt, left it on a chair, and unzipped my pants as I followed her.
She lowered herself to look down. “So if I lean like this…”
I was hard and ready. As I reached to roll her panties down, I ripped a hole in them.
She stood to look but her gaze went to my stiff dick.
“I’ll buy you a new pair.”
She winked at me and wiggled her backside.
I entered her soft, folded center, and she let out a small sigh and said, “Ohhh.”
I kissed her shoulder. She was perfect and took all of me. She moaned, and her body was clearly ready as she let out her sexy sounds.
We set a rhythm, and moment later, she orgasmed. My hands gripped her thighs, but I needed to see her.
So I slid out long enough for her to turn. She held me and lifted one leg up, but her gaze was clouded and wonderful.
All that was missing was her telling me she loved me.
I wished for it as I finished and forgot the rest of my thoughts.
She held me until her body became more lax from our frantic fucking.
I let her go and grabbed my shirt, tugging it around her.
She held it and stared at me.
I grabbed my boxers to tug on and said, “Let’s get you in.”
As we walked back into the library she said, “You’re one of the good ones, Michael.”
My shoulders slumped in disappointment—she didn’t feel the same.
I held the door for her so that we could go back up the stairs together. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
She was wearing my shirt around her as we walked next to each other. “I mean it. You’re considerate, charming, sweet…”
I tensed but held her door open for her. “I sound like a teddy bear.”
The second we were in the bedroom, she yawned. Then she said, “And you’re drop-dead gorgeous, a great kisser, and you fill me entirely.”
I laughed and walked her to the bed as she was clearly tired. I held the blankets up, and we slipped in.
“We both know you take all of me,” I said.
She hugged her pillow and stared into my eyes. My heart whispered that she cared about me.
I wanted to believe we were on the same page.
Then she said, “Your goodness, though, is why we’re here and why you’re going to be a great dad.”
So no declarations. I had to speak up. I trembled and said, “I hope so. I’m nervous about it.”
“Why?” she asked as she cupped my face.
My heart pounded, but I traced her shoulder and arm. “Because I was raised via nannies and school. I’m not sure how to hold a baby. My own mother certainly didn’t hold me.”
“That was her loss because you’re great.” She smiled at me. “But I’ve not held a baby since I was a teenager.”
I kissed her hand, which she’d dropped next to mine. “That’s more experience than me.”
She shook her head. “That doesn’t make me a good mom, though.”
I kissed her forehead. She was sweet and kind and strong.
“Are you worried about it?” I asked.
She closed her eyes as though saying a silent prayer for a moment. Then she said, “Yeah. I mean, I took my sister to one party, and when I went to check on her, she was high.”
Interesting. She’d mentioned that before.
“She’s older than you, though,” I said.
She nodded. “Yeah, she is, and she married the man she’d dated since middle school.”
Right. As our palms clasped, I said, “Then she is responsible for her own actions.”
She let out a sigh and said, “To be honest, I was shocked. I was outside in the backyard to talk to a friend for five minutes, and I never did any of that. I just wanted to tell the world to fuck off and to get out of town as fast as I could. I never could imagine how she planned a life where she’d get a house in the same town and just stay there. ”
I laughed and nodded. “Which you did, and she stayed and raised a family.”
She took a deep breath, but her face pinkened. “Well, I felt guilty for years, and it doesn’t make me feel like I’d be a good mom now.”
I pressed a hand to my chest. “You’re going to fine and train me how to help.”
Her eyes widened. “Train you?”
I nodded. “You’re the leader with experience, but I’m a quick study.”
“We’ll see about that,” she said without laughing, but she had a smile on her face.
I inched closer to her hypnotic gaze. “Oh, is there a test now?”
She shook her head and pressed a hand to her stomach. “Actually, no. I’m hungry, like starving hungry. When I was out, all I had was tea and snacks.”
I grabbed the house iPad from a drawer. “What do you want?”
She sucked on her bottom lip and sat up. “Cheeseburger. Double the patties unless, of course, they’re half pounders.”
I ordered the half-pound cheeseburger and fries and winked. “I hope you’re having a boy.”
As I slid the iPad back into the drawer, she said, “I hope it’s a girl, to be honest.”
A girl would be fun—to hold her hand and take her out in a dress. As the image played out in my head, I blinked and asked, “Why?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know if I’m so good with little boys.”
I folded my hands between my legs. “You’re good to this man.”
She stared at my cock under the sheets and said, “You’re the one that takes care of me far more than I take care of you.”
I smiled back at her. “You’re only saying that because I learned to cook.”
She relaxed and rolled her head back on the pillow. “That’s more than me.”
I followed her and said, “I look at it as a hobby and something I do that helps you.”
She tensed like she was holding her tongue but then shook her head. “I… don’t think I’d have ever left my comfortable bubble if I wasn’t pregnant. I’d have denied myself a relationship with you because of some stupid bosses at an office that never mattered to me.”
Maybe that was the problem. I stared in her eyes and asked, “Are you bitter over it?”
She swiped her face and said, “No. The opposite. I don’t ever remember being this happy.”
Good. I was happy too.
Staff knocked on the door.
I sat up to get it for her and said, “That would be your dinner.”
She grabbed a bathrobe from the bathroom and tied it around her waist. “That came super fast. Let’s eat, and then you can ravage me again.”
She let out a sigh the second I brought in the tray left at the door, and she headed to the small table near the balcony door.
I asked, “Is that what the food is for?”
She winked and said, “You bet that sweet ass of yours it is.”
My heart murmured to confess my feelings. However, I kissed her cheek and said, “Well, I’ll let you eat and hop in the shower.”
She picked up her food like it had been delivered from heaven, and she called out, “I’ll be fed, full, naked, and ready.”
“I can’t wait to see your belly actually get bigger with my child inside.”
She met my gaze, and for one second, I thought she would tell me how she cared or how she felt. However, she sighed and said, “We have some time to go for that.”
Right. I needed not to push though the longer we spent together, the more I wanted to confess how she had my entire heart.