Chapter 15
Kavya
The early morning sunlight filters through the room, and I find myself on the recliner, still in the same position as last night. Yesterday was a rollercoaster of emotions—some parts good and some bad. The good part was that Reyansh showed up, and I finally gave in, promising to give us a try and open up to him, which wasn’t a lie. I am done fighting—done with the endless push and pull, and tired of keeping him at arm’s length. For so long, I’ve been afraid to let him in, afraid of getting hurt. But now? I have come to realise how much I want this. How much I want us to work, to let him into my heart.
The bad part, which still feels like a heavy burden, was when I opened the file and pored over my sister’s call log. I found some of the things that didn’t sit well with me.
Even now, my stomach twists and I bite my nails nervously, all the while staring at Deepak’s name, which appears in her call history continuously for a week leading up to the accident. The shock isn’t just from the sheer number of calls, but from the fact that Nisha never liked Deepak. Sure, she tolerated him as my fiancé, but she always told me I deserved someone better. Whenever Deepak would drop by, or we’d meet up, Nisha and Deepak barely spoke to each other, keeping their interactions strictly formal.
I close my eyes as confusion spreads through my mind. Why the hell were there a hundred calls from Deepak to Nisha? What on earth did they have to discuss? And why wasn’t I aware of it? Questions swirl in my mind, each one more disturbing and confusing than the last. My ex, the man Kiara barely tolerated, reaching out to her incessantly just before her accident sure is a puzzle that feels like a punch to the gut.
The sudden knock on my door startles me, breaking my train of troubling thoughts. I sit up straight, quickly closing the file in my lap, just as Sunita Aunty steps in, carrying a cup of coffee in her hand.
“How are you feeling now?” she asks softly, placing the coffee on the small table next to the recliner and gently running her hand through my hair.
I want to confide in her, to share with her the pain I feel, as if a heavy weight is pressing down on it. But when I see the worry in her eyes, I know that I can’t bring myself to burden her further. So, I put on a cheerful smile and reach out to hold her hands softly. Looking into her eyes, I reassure her, “I am feeling much better, honestly. Work was so hectic yesterday. But I am sure after having your special coffee, I’ll feel even more refreshed.”
Aunty studies my face for a few seconds. I am not sure if she bought my lie, but I silently cross my fingers, hoping she doesn’t question me further.
“You really need to go a little easy on yourself,” she says gently, which makes me release a small breath of relief. I sure as hell hate lying to Aunty, but at this moment, I am glad I managed to get away with it.
I nod slightly. “You’re right, Aunty. I’ll try to take it easy from now on.”
“Reyansh is such a good boy, you know,” she blurts out, changing the subject or rather steering the conversation toward her favorite topic, a sly smile appearing on her face.
I groan inwardly, knowing exactly where this is headed. “Aunty, we’re not discussing this,” I say firmly, giving her my best stern look.
“Ya ya, why would you want to discuss anything with this old lady? After all, who am I but just a caretaker!” She shrugs in a melodramatic way, which has me both smiling and exasperated.
“Aunty, please, no need for drama. I am too smart to be trapped by it,” I grin at her. “You very well know how important you are to me. And I promise I will soon talk to you about Reyansh, but today is not that day.” Then, hoping to distract her, I add, “Aunty, can we focus on breakfast now? I am hungry, and I am really craving your stuffed paratha. Can you make them for me, please?”
Aunty smiles warmly and nods. “Of course, dear. Why don’t you freshen up and get dressed while I go the kitchen and start preparing your parathas?”
“Sounds perfect,” I reply as Aunty bends and kisses my forehead before she walks out of the room, closing the door softly behind her.
I huff, my eyes drifting back to the file on my lap and then to my phone on the side table. I know I should call Officer Viraj to inform him about what I found, but there’s a part of me that wants to reach out to Deepak first. It’s not because I still have feelings for him—not even remotely close—but I do want to give him the benefit of the doubt for the sake of the years we’ve been together. I know it might seem foolish, but I can’t shake off this feeling of wanting to hear him once before Officer Viraj steps in.
With trembling hands, I pick up the mobile and dial Deepak’s number.
“Kavya,” he says the moment he answers.
I close my eyes for a moment, trying to steady myself. I don’t know why, but hearing his voice stirs up emotions I thought I’d long buried. My hand tightens around the mobile as I try to focus on the reason for my call, pushing aside the hurt and pain that his voice evoked in me.
“Can we meet?” I ask him.
“I’d like that,” he responds quickly, almost relieved. “I was actually thinking of calling you, but I didn’t have the courage. I wasn’t sure if you’d even want to talk to me. I can’t tell you how glad I am that you called.”
Before I can respond, Maya’s voice cuts through the background, demanding to know who he’s talking to. For a second, it feels like I am having an out-of-body experience. It’s still a bitter pill for me to swallow that he cheated on me with her. I am on the verge of ending the call, but then I hear him assure her that it’s just a friend. I hear the sound of footsteps and a door closing, assuming he must have stepped into another room, away from her to talk.
“Sorry about that,” his voice returns to the call.
“That’s okay, but can we meet alone?” I manage to say, though my voice wavers.
“Sure, name the place and time, and I’ll be there,” he responds without any hesitation. I am relieved he didn’t push for more details. I wasn’t comfortable having this talk over the phone or with Maya around.
“Does one hour from now work for you at the coffee shop downtown?”
“It works,” he says, and I hang up the call without much of a goodbye.
I take a deep breath, my thoughts filled with uncertainty. What will hurt more—facing Deepak after all these months or confronting him about my sister’s death? ‘I guess I will have to find out,’ I say to myself as I put the file away on my bedside table before heading to the bathroom to get dressed, bracing myself for the emotional storm ahead.
???
Sitting at a small two-seater table in the corner of the coffee shop, I wrap my hands around the warm mug of coffee, staring blankly into it . Ever since I realised the accident wasn’t really an accident , I’ve been on edge, and seeing Deepak’s name on my sister’s phone log only amplifies my anxiety. Doubts cloud my mind as I debate whether confronting Deepak is the right move or not. Maybe yes, maybe no. But at least I had called Officer Viraj on my way here, asking him to check into Deepak . He promised to get back to me, and I cling to that small hope that this meeting with Deepak doesn’t end up being a colossal mistake on my part.
“Kavya,” I hear the voice and look up to see the one person I never wanted to face ever again. Yet here I am, staring at Deepak, dressed in those familiar denim jeans and that casual red polo neck t-shirt—the one I gave him for his birthday. The sight of him in it only heightens my discomfort, making it painfully obvious that meeting him was a terrible idea, even before we’ve exchanged a word.
Why is he wearing that t-shirt? What does he want to prove? These questions churn in my mind, but I push them aside, unwilling to give him the pleasure of knowing I still pay attention to him or am affected by him even in the slightest way. Instead, I plaster on a neutral expression, pretending like his choice of outfit means nothing to me.
“I appreciate you agreeing to meet me,” I say, my voice coming out cold, and I am sure he caught the lack of emotion in it.
“You don’t have to sound so formal, Kavya. We’re not strangers. We don’t have that barrier between us,” he says with a sigh, taking a seat across from me.
“Contrary to what you think, there’s absolutely nothing between us, and there certainly is no ‘us,’” I retort sharply, my anger seething just beneath the surface.
“Did you ask me to meet you just because you were itching for a fight?” he asks, raising his eyebrows as he signals the waiter. The audacity of this guy—acting like he’s done nothing wrong, as if I am just some toddler throwing a tantrum. But I know better than to lose my cool. I need to have this conversation and find answers.
“No,” I say through gritted teeth as the waiter arrives. Deepak gives me a nod before turning his attention to the waiter to place his order. Once the waiter leaves, he brings his eyes back to me and leans back in his chair.
“So, if it’s not to start a war, then what is this about?”
“Nisha,” I say, holding his gaze and watching his brow furrow in confusion.
“Nisha?” he questions, then looks concerned. “Is she okay?”
“She’s okay, I mean, still breathing if that’s what you’re asking. But that’s not what I meant ,” I take a momentary pause before I launch into my questions. “ What I want to know is why there were hundreds of calls from you to my sister mere days before her accident. And why didn’t you tell me you two were in touch over the phone? Why hide it?” I ask, watching the color drain from his face, causing my heart to race in my chest as I prepare to hear something I may not be ready for.
He runs his hands through his hair, his eyes locked onto mine. “How did you find out?”
“That’s beside the point. Tell me why you two were in touch,” I repeat, my patience wearing thin by the second. “And you better tell the truth, for once.”
“Nisha…” he starts, his voice faltering just as the waiter places his coffee in front of him. Deepak waits for the waiter to leave before continuing, “She found out about my affair with Maya and was telling me that I should tell you before she did. That’s why I kept calling her—just trying to buy time .”
“My sister knew about your affair?” I whisper, staring at him, feeling the pain tighten its grip around my chest.
“She did,” he admits quietly.
“Did... did you... Is that why…. Are you responsible for the accident?” I can’t help but ask despite knowing the danger and risk of confronting him before Officer Viraj gives the green signal. My breath catches and my voice trembles as I push through the fear gripping me. Fear, anger, and desperation all grip me at once, making it impossible to suppress the overwhelming need to know the truth, damn the consequences.
His eyes widen in shock. “What the fuck, Kavya?” His tone rises a little, but when he looks around and notices we’re in public, he quickly lowers his voice and continues, “Hell no, Kavya. How could you even think that ? Do you really believe I can stoop so low?” he asks, sounding both hurt and offended. But despite the mortified look in his eyes, I can’t bring myself to feel anything for him, not even guilt for asking him such a question.
“To be honest, I don’t think I know you at all or what you’re capable of.”
“Come on, Kavya, you know me well enough. You fell in love with me and trusted me to spend your life with me. We were engaged, for God’s sake,” he points out, trying to remind me of our past. However, instead of softening, it only fuels the anger and hatred I have for him.
“You’re right; I did fall in love with you and trust you completely. But you shattered that trust, and now I regret every moment of it,” I snap back, bitterness lacing my words. “Get this through your thick skull: your cheating isn’t easy to accept—neither yesterday, today, nor ever. All it does is make me doubt whether I ever truly knew you, especially since I failed to see that you were capable of such deceit. That’s why I’m questioning you about whether you had a hand in the accident.”
He runs a hand over his face, letting out a long, weary sigh. “ I know I messed up, and I hurt you in ways I can’t take back . I’m fully aware of the pain I’ve caused you and that I turned our relationship ugly. I understand that you don’t trust me. But please, Kavya, believe me when I say I had nothing to do with your sister’s accident.”
As much as I hate him and can’t trust him again, there’s something inside me that tells me he’s not lying. He may be a cheater and a liar, but I don’t believe he’s capable of murder.
“I’ll find that out for myself rather than go by your words,” I say, my tone deliberately distant to make it clear that I’m not fully convinced by his words.
“Fair enough,” he responds quietly. “I have no doubt that, in time, you’ll see that I’m not lying.”
“ I really hope, for your sake, that you’re being honest for once. B ecause while I’ve come to terms with your infidelity, if you had anything to do with that accident , I promise I will ensure you pay for it.”
“I heard you loud and clear,” he states, his eyes locking onto mine with sorrow and regret. “I loved you, Kavya. I still do.”
A bitter laugh escapes my lips. “You certainly have a unique way of showing your love. It’s baffling how shameless you can be, confessing your love after cheating on me and getting another woman pregnant with your child,” I remark dryly.
He swallows hard. “I wish I could turn back time and make things right. I’m miserable without you. Maya isn’t the woman I thought I wanted to be with. I’ve realised that I want you, not her.”
“Your words no longer matter to me ,” I reply coolly. “ I’ve realised I don’t want to be with a man who changes his heart as easily as the seasons change . I’ve moved on and have no desire to revisit the past.”
“Don’t say that,” he pleads, leaning forward. “Please, give me another chance to prove that I’ve changed.”
Unable to continue the conversation any longer, I swing my purse strap over my shoulder and stand up. “I’m done with this conversation,” I say, my voice wavering with frustration. “You’ve proven to be a terrible life partner, but please try to be the dad your kid deserves.” Without waiting for his response, I walk out, determined not to let the tears, hot and stinging like acid, spill from my eyes. He’s a closed chapter in my life, and I refuse to shed another tear for him.