Chapter 3
THREE
KNOX
“Trust me, it’s better just to rip the band-aid off with Savi than let it fester for days. She knows you’re back in town, so it shouldn’t be that much of a surprise to see you,” Miles’s voice filters through the speaker, and I easily detect the humor in it.
I’m glad someone is finding this situation funny.
Miles has been my best friend since middle school. He’s the closest person to me, and one of the few who know about my past. His family welcomed me right away into theirs, and for that I will always be grateful. There’s no telling where I would be right now if it weren’t for him.
He’s also Savi’s older brother, which makes things a whole hell of a lot more complicated. Let’s just say she’s not my biggest fan. Not that I can blame her. I’ve done a really good job of pushing her away and keeping her at arm’s length.
I’ll gladly take on that anger, though, and the fiery blue storm in her eyes that I always seem to evoke. Anything is better than the fear I saw in them that night eleven years ago.
Gritting my teeth, I force the emotions away. It’s bad enough I have to relive them at night. I don’t need them coming out during the day, too.
“Seeing me on the street, yes, but not in her goddamn house,” I say through clenched teeth.
“It’s my house too, along with my brothers. It doesn’t make sense for you to keep staying at a hotel until you find a house to buy. Plus, it will make us all feel better knowing she’s got you there to look after her.”
“I’m pretty sure she’s not going to see it that way,” I mutter. Part of me knows I’m walking into the lion’s den and should keep my distance from her like I’ve always done in the past. The selfish part of me, though, can’t seem to stay away no matter how hard I try, even when I know I should.
“Listen, it’s a big house, and you’re staying in Ryder’s old apartment out by the pool.
You don’t even have to see each other if you don’t want to.
” I hear someone in the background speaking to Miles, and listen to the muffled conversation before he gets back on.
“The band that’s playing tonight just got here, and I need to talk to them before they go on.
I’ll call you later when you’re settled in, and you can let me know how it went,” he chuckles.
“If I don’t answer, that means she murdered me, and it’s too late.”
“Noted,” he laughs. “You know,” he says with a pause, and I can only imagine what bright epiphany just popped into his head.
“This is probably a good thing. It will give you a chance to hash out your differences and finally learn to get along. I should have thought of forcing you guys to live together a long time ago.”
“Or…I end up in the middle of the ocean with cement bricks tied to my feet.”
“Or that,” he chuckles, before hanging up.
Sighing, I throw my ball cap on the front seat next to me before aggressively raking my hand through my hair and putting it back on.
With Miles’s wedding in the spring, maybe he’s right.
We do need to find a way to at least coexist. The last thing I want to do is ruin my best friend’s wedding because we can’t keep our emotions in check.
Savi and I have been tiptoeing around what happened for years, and maybe it’s time to fully face it head-on.
I just don’t know where that’s going to leave us once we do, and that scares the hell out of me.
Taking the exit, I head toward the small coastal town and slow down as I approach the Welcome to Blue Haven sign.
Ryder’s Restores comes into view first, sitting across from the local marina to my right. The sleek black building has tall windows lining the front, and I get a glimpse of the cars being showcased on the main floor.
Beams of light shine down, highlighting each individual supercar that is being featured for the month. Miles’s younger brother, Ryder, has built a very impressive business from the ground up. Everyone who’s anyone knows he’s the one to go to if you want any work done on exotics and supercars.
He found me this beauty that I’m driving and did an amazing job on the upgrades. I tell all my rich hockey buddies to go to him, and not one has been disappointed.
Making my way further into the downtown area, small businesses line the streets on either side now. I see the lights on at Inked, the local tattoo business owned by Travis and Jake, as I pass by.
They are the only ones that I let ink me.
You could say that I was their guinea pig and offered up my virgin skin at sixteen as a blank canvas for them to practice on.
Inking my skin became a way for me to express my feelings on the inside when I needed a way to release them.
I’ve since had both arm sleeves done and the left side of my chest, each line done with purpose and meaning behind it.
A beautiful blend of pain, chaos, and the briefest glimpse of beauty, if you look hard enough, is etched permanently on my skin. To those who don’t know the real me, it’s just tattoos and adds an edge of danger that women seem to love when they get a look at them.
The few that do know see them for what they are. My open scars that will never heal and the demons that will forever be waiting in the shadows, hoping one day, I’ll let them get the best of me.
I absently rub my hand over my heart and take in a jagged breath to force some air into my tight lungs.
It’s the one place I dedicated on my body to remind myself that there is still beauty in this world.
My black t-shirt stretches over the dark ink underneath, and just knowing it’s there brings me the comfort I need to ease the pressure forming in my chest.
I finally head out of town and continue along the coastal road. Houses replace businesses the further I drive away from the busy part of Blue Haven. Growing up here, I was always in awe of these homes.
I couldn’t imagine waking up every morning and being able to see the ocean from my bedroom window. It was something unimaginable to my young self that people actually lived like this.
It was the same when I would visit Miles’s house. Back then, he lived further inland in one of the small beach neighborhoods that are spread throughout the town. His home always seemed so huge compared to the shitty trailer I lived in with my dad.
Even though the Montgomerys treated me like one of their own, I never felt like I belonged in their world.
I was terrified I would somehow taint this perfect family that I had come to love.
I was the kid in the trailer park that nobody wanted…
who would fake just how bad life was at home because I didn’t feel I deserved anything better.
Nobody back then knew the monster I was living with, but I stayed.
I stayed because I promised her I would, and even then, I would have stayed because of the guilt that ate me alive with every breath I took.
I couldn’t save my mom, but I could at least do this one thing since she sacrificed her life for me.
Slowing down, I approach the blue beach house at the end. The sun set over an hour ago, but you can still see the faint hues of pink lingering in the sky before darkness finally takes over. Even though there isn’t enough light to see the water, I can feel its presence.
The ocean has always fascinated me. It can go from being the most beautiful, majestic beauty to the most dangerous destruction you’ve ever seen in a matter of seconds. Calming you with its presence on days the sun is shining bright or fueling any turmoil within on days the sky turns dark.
The vast blue water has always been the one place I seek when I feel like I’m drowning.
It’s a reminder to me that even the most beautiful things on Earth have a darkness to them, but it still doesn’t stop people from seeing the beauty that also lies inside.
Sometimes, you just have to search harder because it’s buried so deep that you forget it’s even there until someone briefly shines a light on it.
Turning the wheel, I ease into the driveway and shut off the engine. I don’t see any main lights on, so I can’t tell if Savi is home or not.
Taking a deep breath, I grab my duffel bag from the front seat next to me and pull my six-foot-four frame from the car. My grey sweats hang low on my hips as I hoist the heavy bag over my shoulder.
I came straight from a late-night gym workout and had packed up all my belongings earlier when I checked out of the hotel. The rest of my things from my New York apartment are scheduled to be delivered tomorrow.
Deciding to keep the peace a little bit longer, I walk to the side gate instead of choosing the front door. It will give me some time to unpack and think about the best way to approach this.
I take the stone path on the side of the house and stop when I see the bamboo structure.
Peering inside, I notice it’s an outdoor shower.
The side of the house has been covered with smooth stone, and with the giant showerhead hanging directly down in the center, it gives you the illusion of being under a waterfall.
The brothers must have installed this after they moved in because it wasn’t here when I first toured it with them. I spot the pink containers on a small wooden table and notice the water droplets still clinging to them.
Savi must have been in here a few minutes ago.
Hesitating briefly, I step inside and lift the bottle to my nose. Vanilla and coconut fill my senses, and I squeeze my eyes shut at the onslaught of emotions. Dark, silky hair and Pacific blue eyes flood my head with images. My body reacts with a ferocious need as her scent surrounds me.