Chapter 4
FOUR
SAVI
My brain tries rapidly to catch up with what just happened as I stare into the deep blue eyes of the man that I so desperately want to hate.
Knox fucking Stone has been a constant thorn in my side for as long as I can remember, but he also saved me.
How can you hate someone who saved you?
With him, though, there’s a very blurred line between hate and wanting something you can never have. He’s made it very clear in the past how he feels about me, and I’m not about to give him the satisfaction of knowing what he does to me.
I shake the fog from my brain and scramble to get off of him. His strong hands have a grip on my waist, and I end up straddling him with my movements, which was mistake number one, as I feel him harden beneath me.
My body impulsively wants to sink into the feel of him, but I fight the urge as I invite my anger in to take over the lust-induced haze he’s got me under.
“Let go of me, you big ass,” I grumble as I wrestle out of his hold and stand on shaky legs. My t-shirt barely covers me as I push it down and try to compose myself as I watch him slowly get up and stand to full height.
Of course, the one man on this earth that doesn’t make me want to flinch underneath him has to be the most gorgeous specimen that God has ever made.
He brushes his hair out of his eyes, and his golden streaks flash briefly in the light before he replaces his baseball cap, tucking the loose strands away. I notice he’s grown it out more, with the longer wings showing at the nape of his neck.
His black t-shirt with the Bolts logo stretches across his broad chest as I impulsively go lower and take in his grey sweats. It’s like the ultimate sin candy on a stick staring at me, just begging me to have a taste.
He’s still fully hard as I glance at his outline and try not to wonder if it’s as big as it looks before quickly looking away. At least I know he feels something towards me, even if he says otherwise. Hopefully, it’s painful for him, and his blue balls fall off from the pressure.
“Don’t get too smug, sunshine. I get hard for just about anything with tits.” His smirk has me wanting to smack it right off his face.
“It’s not that impressive,” I say, nodding my head to what clearly is contradicting my lie I’m forcing through my lips. “I can get better just by walking into a bar and picking a random stranger.”
His eyes narrow, and I get satisfaction from the way his jaw tenses up. He’s just like my brothers with his overbearing protectiveness. Unlike my brothers, though, I love to see how far I can push him until he finally snaps.
He can deny it all he wants, but there’s always been an underlying current of energy with us. I felt it the moment I met him at only seven years old. Back then, it was innocent and just a strong connection I couldn’t explain, but as I got older, it developed into something I wanted to explore.
And I did most nights with just my imagination, my thoughts drifting to him as my body slowly began to cross that fragile line into womanhood.
Then that night happened, and a year later, I was dating Tristan. After that, I left for college, and we didn’t see much of each other unless he came to visit us during the holidays or when he came home during the off-season.
It’s easy to tell yourself the connection isn’t as strong when you are miles away, but every time we are in the same room, it’s like being body slammed into a brick wall, and you don’t know how you are going to survive or even feel when you come out on the other side.
“You shouldn’t be hooking up with strangers,” he says through his rock-hard jaw that I’m surprised hasn’t broken a molar yet.
“Lucky for you, I’m not your concern. I’m an adult and can sleep with whoever I want to.
You should know how that works better than anyone, right, Stone?
The number twenty-two is definitely a hot commodity, and the ultimate bragging rights for the puck bunny community, is it not?
” I ask, looking as innocent as possible.
“I guess my dick must be more impressive than you give it credit for.” His eyes rake down my body, and I resist the urge to cross my arms over my breasts, which are clearly on display through my thin white shirt, as I feel my nipples harden at his gaze.
Heat flashes briefly in his eyes before he abruptly walks past me and yanks open the refrigerator door.
“I highly doubt that,” I mutter, picking up my AirPods off the floor and setting them on the counter. “What are you doing here, Knox? Don’t you have someone else you could grace with your presence and make their life miserable?”
I turn around and swallow hard as I meet his intense gaze. His chest is stretching his shirt with each rapid movement as his breathing intensifies.
“What?” I try to rack my brain about what could possibly have gotten him so worked up. His knuckles are white, and I expect the door handle to crack at any minute.
“Nothing,” he growls. “How about you put some pants on, and I’ll tell you why I’m here.” He turns around again and yanks a bottle of beer from the shelf.
It’s then that I realize I just gave him the perfect view of my ass when I bent over to get my headphones off the floor. I probably should put some pants on, but I’m having too much fun watching him squirm.
“I’m good. I’m comfortable with what I have on.” Sitting down on the wooden barstool at the island, I cross my legs as his eyes warily watch me. “I’ll take one of those,” I say, pointing at the beer in his hand.
Grabbing a second one, he takes the bottle opener that’s magnetized to the side of the fridge and pops both tops before handing me one.
“Thanks,” I grin sweetly before taking a long pull from the bottle. The beer is ice cold and feels good on my parched throat.
Sighing, he pulls the barstool next to me to the other side of the island, keeping a safe barrier between us. I’m not sure at this point if it’s to protect him or me from this close proximity we are forced to be in.
“As you know, I’ve moved back home,” he says, leaning back and taking a drink from the amber bottle before setting it back on the counter. “Season starts next week, and instead of living in a hotel room, Miles invited me to stay in the guest house out back.”
“What!” I shriek, sitting upright. “He can’t do that without asking me!”
I’m going to kill my brother.
What was he thinking?
He knows we can’t be in a room for more than two minutes without wanting to kill each other. How the hell does he think we could actually live together?
“Miles thought it was best if we just surprised you. Not sure that was the best move since I about got my balls obliterated.” He gives the barest hint of a smile as he remembers our encounter. “Travis, Jake, and Ryder gave their approval, too, by the way.”
“I’m going to murder them all,” I mutter.
I can’t believe they didn’t at least consult me on this or warn me so I had time to get used to the idea.
“Why here?” I ask suddenly. “You can afford to buy the damn hotel, or you could even rent a condo. I’m sure there are some nice ones right on the beach you could stay at. ”
“I don’t want to rent,” he says, shaking his head, “and I’m sick of hotel life.
I get enough of it on the road. My contract was a good one, and I’ll be riding out with this team until retirement.
I’ve got my eye on a few houses, and once I settle on one, I’ll be out of your hair.
In the meantime, your brothers thought it would be a good idea if you had someone to help you out around here and take care of the place. So here I am,” he shrugs.
“In other words, they want someone here to babysit me,” I fume. “I think after throwing your ass to the floor, it’s obvious I can take care of myself.”
“You did surprise me on that one,” he chuckles slightly as he rubs his hand over his light scruff. “Where did you learn that move?”
“I’ve taken several self-defense classes over the years.
” I focus on the bottle in my hand as I shuffle it between my hands.
“I refuse to ever feel helpless again, so I made sure I knew how to protect myself. My mom and I signed up together a couple of months after…” I let the words die on my tongue as my emotions get too thick to say them out loud.
I can feel his eyes on me, but I refuse to look up. I already know what I’ll see, and it burns me to the core every time pity flashes across those blues. It’s a reminder that I wasn’t strong enough, and I hate that he knows that part of me.
“Sav…,” his voice comes out painfully raw, and I shake my head adamantly.
“Not tonight, Knox. I think I’ve had enough excitement for one evening.” A sad laugh escapes, and I take another sip to ease the ache in my throat.
“Another night then,” he sighs, and relief washes over me that he’s not going to push it any further.
“About you staying here,” I clear my throat and change the subject. “Since I have no choice in the matter…”
“You have a choice,” he says, cutting me off. I flick my eyes to his, and I’m glad when I see his guard is back up and he’s reverted back to his usual smug self. “If you don’t want me here, I’m not going to force you. Just say the word, and I’ll leave.”
Surprise hits me as I study him from across the counter.
“That must have hurt,” I laugh. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you give up control.”
“Don’t get used to it. It’s a one-time offer,” he mutters.
“Hmm.” I study him as he uncomfortably shifts in his chair. He’s the hardest person in the world to read when he doesn’t want you to know what he’s thinking. He’s like a stone wall—no pun intended.
Miles has told me before that he’s had a hard life growing up, but he would never give me any specifics.
No matter how hard I try with Knox, he’s always pushed me away and refused to let me get close to the real Knox Stone. Every once in a while, I feel it when he looks at me, but seconds later, his walls are up, and we are back to loathing each other at a distance.