2. Chapter Two
Chapter Two
Paul
I stare at my phone while Andre hollers at the television screen, as if somehow the players can hear him through it.
I texted Amelia when we got in an hour ago, and she still hasn’t seen the text. I shouldn’t worry about my kid being with his mother all weekend, but I can’t help it. I haven’t gone on a trip since Vegas, and that was like eight years ago, right before Amelia got pregnant with Maddox.
It was an accident. Which sounds shitty, because that’s what most guys say, right?
But it’s the truth. We were just two friends who got stupid drunk once and made a baby.
I’m not sure why I agreed to go on this trip at all, except for the fact that Andre talked me into going. Not that I didn’t want to see the guys. We used to have so much fun together when we were in college, but my life… it isn’t like theirs.
I’m not some big-shot hockey player like Alex, nor am I on the cover of GQ like Cameron. I don’t jet-set across the country like Trey or Andre, and I certainly don’t have a cool job in tech like Hudson or Austen.
I’m a divorced, middle school gym teacher. Talk about boring.
“Everything okay?” Andre asks, and I realize how long I’ve been staring. I force a smile, not wanting to bring him down with my bullshit. Andre’s got enough going on in his life, he doesn’t need my issues. I can barely deal with them, so I don’t expect anyone else to. Besides, his are a lot worse.
“Fine,” I say, shoving my phone away and reaching for my beer.
I feel his gaze on me, and for a minute I think he’s going to call me out, so I don’t give him the chance.
“So, I was thinking—” I say, clearing my throat.
“That’s always dangerous,” Andre adds with a chuckle.
“Shut up.” I smack his arm.
Andre rolls his eyes.
“This is payback because of Vegas, isn’t it?” he asks, his voice light.
I give him a grin of my own. When we’d gone to Vegas for Austen’s bachelor party, I’d won two tickets to see a Cirque show from one of those spin the wheel games.
Dre said he was game to check it out, but we both got absolutely wrecked that night, so we never went.
It’s neither of our fault, but I regret not going and doing more with my friends when I had the chance.
I didn’t know that only a few months later my entire life was going to get upended. I thought I had all the time in the world to be young and dumb, but life doesn’t work out the way you want it to most of the time.
I don’t regret sleeping with Amelia because we got Maddox, and I love him more than anything. But sometimes I miss what my life could’ve been like. I feel like I missed out on a lot of shit.
And even now, when I’m states away from him, I can’t stop checking my phone like a damn helicopter parent.
I told myself this trip would be good for me. Seeing Austen—who I haven’t seen in years—is just the thing I need to feel like I’m not some old, lame guy whose only life is his kid because he can’t seem to hold a relationship down.
“Maybe,” I tout. He just shakes his head as I signal for the bartender to bring us another round. “Put this on my tab,” I say to the bartender before he can protest.
“Sure thing,” she says, biting her lip and giving me a look-over.
Maybe when I was younger, I would’ve flirted right back. Bought her a drink, asked what time she gets off work.
Fuck her in the bathroom and slip her my number if the sex was good.
But now… now I just feel like it’s all too much effort. Flirting, dating, sex.
Amelia tells me all the time it’s fine; I should be dating.
It’s not that I am holding out for us to get back together or anything, I know we’re better off this way, but I just…
I don't really have a desire to hook up or be casual when the selection pool is mostly parents whose kids I teach. I don’t need that kind of dumpster fire, and I’ll be damned if I let my personal life fuck up shit with my job.
I give her a polite smile. “Thanks.”
She frowns, and I don’t miss the way Andre is looking at me. Judging me.
“What?” I ask, my eyes drifting back up to the television.
“Are you blind?” he asks.
“No,” I grunt.
“Then what’s the problem? She’s hot. Clearly into you.”
I don’t expect Dre to understand, even though he knows me better than most. But there’s one thing he doesn’t know. One thing no one knows, except my parents, and of course, Amelia. We haven’t even told Maddox yet, and part of me wonders if that’s what she’s doing. Why she hasn’t answered me…
“Amelia has a boyfriend,” I say carefully.
It gets quiet, and for a minute, I think he’s not going to say anything.
“So? All the more reason to get back in the game.”
I look at him from my periphery. The lights shine on him like a spotlight, and I swear it’s like no time has passed. Like we’re both still young, dumb athletes living it up. I wish we were sometimes. Life was so much easier then.
“The game has changed a lot, Dre. I wouldn’t know the first thing about dating anyone.”
Andre chews his lip as he looks from me to the bartender on the other side of the room.
“Who said anything about dating? You just need to get back on the horse.”
I shake my head. “No, I’ll tell you what I need.”
The bartender drops off our beers, and I make a point of focusing on Andre.
“What’s that?” he asks, his voice dropping an octave as he sips his beer.
“Two tickets to Cirque De Soleil and for you to shut the hell up.”