Chapter 21
LILA
Iwas in love with Greece, and I’d only been here a week.
The air was fragrant and warm, carrying possibilities and positivity, as far as I was concerned.
The hotel was beautiful, overlooking the sea which glistened beneath the scorching sun.
I had taken to sitting on my balcony in the early mornings, sipping coffee and then heading into the little town for a spot of breakfast. Orange juice and what was known as a ‘full English breakfast’ hit the spot most mornings, but I would also pop into the Greek bakery for sweet treats when the mood struck.
And that struck regularly. What did they even put in these delicious treats?!
I loved it here. It had soothed my fraught soul, and the locals were so friendly and entertaining—from Giorgios, who ran the hotel, to Dimitri who ran the bar, constantly showing us guests his magic tricks. It was simple, and perfect.
Best of all, there were no memories here.
Nothing to haunt me. I pulled on my swimsuit and frowned at the fit—I must be eating too much because it seemed to be getting tighter.
Then again, it had been drying in the sun on the balcony most days, so maybe that was why.
I sighed and adjusted it, noticing the tan line I already had.
I grabbed my things and headed out of my room into the sun, the chirping crickets greeting me along with a swell of heat. I almost stepped back into the safety of the cool room, but I needed the pool. My stomach growled, reminding me lunch was also needed.
I slipped my air pods in and began humming along to my music, enjoying the warmth of the sun on my skin.
The sky was pure blue, not a cloud in sight.
As I neared the pool, I noticed the pool boy waving at me.
I slipped an air pod out so I could hear his voice calling out hello in that beautiful accent.
“Hello, pretty American lady!”
I laughed, shaking my head. “Hello, Kostas.”
He grinned at me and shook his head, his black curls moving with it. “You look as beautiful as Aphrodite.”
A smile twitched on my lips. “The goddess of love?”
I tossed my towel onto a vacant sun lounger beside an umbrella, feeling grateful. Lots of guests had left yesterday, but Kostas said to expect more tomorrow. I wanted to make the most of the space while I could.
“You are hot.” Kostas commented, appearing at the bottom of my sun lounger.
Did he just call me hot? I peered at him from beneath my wide-brimmed hat. “Sorry?”
“Your skin looks red. Hot.” Kostas gestured to my face, and I flushed, which probably didn't help.
Oh, fuck. Of course, he wasn’t hitting on me. How embarrassing.
“Oh! Yes, very hot.” I fanned myself even though he could understand me perfectly well. I plopped down on the sun lounger and exhaled heavily. It had only been a short walk from my room to the pool, and I was exhausted and overheated.
It must be the perimenopause. I blame that fucking thing for everything.
I made a mental note to book in with the physician when I returned home. Maybe it was time to try HRT or something—I couldn’t carry on like this.
I must have drifted to sleep because the sun shifted position, and I could feel my skin burning.
“Damn!” I muttered and sat up, my face on fire. I smothered my face in suntan lotion—far too late for that—and went to the bar.
Dimitri beamed at me as I approached, then his face fell.
“Oh, you are burnt like toast!”
“Like toast,” I echoed with a bitter laugh. “Can I have something cold and wet, please?”
Dimitri winked at me. “Sex on the beach?”
“Why not?” I sighed. It was the closest I’d get to that.
Dimitri produced a beautiful cocktail, a myriad of orange and pink, filled to the top with ice. He topped it with a little umbrella and began singing as he wandered away to serve the other waiting guests.
I slipped my phone from my bag and saw a message from Vanessa.
Vanessa: Girl, I miss you. Tell me you’ve done a Shirley Valentine and had hot sex on a yacht!
I chuckled. Sex? No way.
I couldn’t even bring myself to have it with Victor for the past couple of months. Wait, was it that long? Confusion filled me as I recalled one night when we’d drunk too much wine, and we’d gone through the motions, mainly because I felt bad for not wanting to be intimate with my own husband.
Had he been screwing Cami then too?
Urgh. I needed to get checked out at the clinic when I got home.
That dirty bastard, screwing me at the same time as her. How long had it been going on between them? I downed my drink and signalled for another, just as a voice said: “Penny for your thoughts?”
It was a deep British male accent, and I turned to see piercing blue eyes boring into mine. His hair was dark with hints of grey, his skin so deeply tanned I wasn’t sure if he was a local despite his accent.
“What do you mean?” I asked with a frown.
Penny?
“Ah, you’re American!” He grinned.
I nodded slowly, watching as Dimitri slid an espresso over to him, acknowledging him in Greek. “I am.”
“In England,” he said, wincing as he took a sip of his espresso. “We say that when we’re wondering what you’re thinking.” He looked at me, amused. “You were scowling, so I was intrigued.”
He wore a cream linen shirt, open at the neck, revealing a decent amount of tanned chest. I averted my eyes and cleared my throat.
“I was thinking of my ex-husband.”
“Ah…” His tone was sombre. “Then I apologise for being intrusive.”
“Not at all,” I replied airily, sipping my drink. “What brings you here?”
He gazed around us, then laughed. “It’s paradise, no?”
I hummed, looking around at the lush plants draped over the whitewashed walls, the beautiful blue sky, and the endless sea. “It sure is.”
I sighed and then turned to find him looking at me instead of the scenery. “What?” I asked, tilting my head.
“Well, I’m just wondering how it would feel to be your ex-husband is all.” He sipped his coffee and locked eyes with me. “I don’t think I’d like it very much.”
Suddenly, I couldn’t breathe. I hadn’t met anyone this direct since…since Victor. But even though he was very attractive and clearly interested in me…I felt nothing really.
Vanessa would be so disappointed with me.
He continued giving me bedroom eyes, and I had to laugh.
“Are you…laughing at me?” He grinned and tried to look offended.
“I may be,” I said. “I’m sorry, it's just…”
I fumbled for the words. Not interested? Maybe I’m asexual or something now. I felt nothing for this handsome man in front of me, and I had no reason to be faithful to Victor anymore. I just felt detached, and that made me feel even worse.
“You seem like you’ve got a lot on your mind.” He smiled. “I’m not pushy, don’t worry. I just recognise a beautiful woman when I see one. I’m Graham.” He held his hand out, and Dimitri winked at me from behind the bar.
“He is…Casanova,” Dimitri remarked playfully. “Be careful with this one.”
I rolled my eyes and shook Graham's hand lightly. I married a bloody Casanova. Not falling for that again.
“Although, I would like to take you for dinner.”
I turned and looked at Graham and his bright blue eyes, the smile teasing on his lips, and had to put him straight.
“I haven’t come here to meet anyone,” I explained gently. “Your attention would be better spent elsewhere.”
“As a friend then? Friends can have dinner.” Graham finished his coffee and rose to his feet. “If you call me on the phone in your room, I’m in room four-two-two.”
I studied him. “You mean that? As friends?”
I didn’t want to lead him on. I had hardly any energy, but dinner with him would be nice.
Graham scoffed. “I’m a gentleman, and a man of my word. I’d love to take you out. I know some beautiful local spots. I can take you to a little restaurant that would blow your mind!”
“Okay,” I agreed, returning his smile. “But I need an afternoon nap.”
He laughed and saluted me before saying goodbye to Dimitri. “Until you call me, then?”
“I’ll call you. Four-two-two, right?”
“Yes.”
I chuckled, watching as he walked away.
“You have a date with Casanova?” Dimitri asked, shuffling his playing cards. “He is a nice man.”
“He is, but I don’t want a man, Dimitri.” I finished my drink and my stomach churned. “I just want some peace.”
Dimitri took my glass and bowed. “I hope you find it, then.”
I strolled away, stopping by my sun lounger to pick up my things, yawning throughout. I was so tired, and I’d barely done anything but nap by the pool and talk to a nice man by the bar.
What is wrong with me?