Chapter 49
VICTOR
Iwoke up to the sound of a car door slamming. I jolted, making my phone slide off my stomach and fall to the floor with a clatter. I rubbed my eyes and saw I'd fallen asleep in the living room, which had sunlight streaming through the window.
Jeez, what time was it?
I reached for my phone just as the door opened, and Lila walked in wearing the same dress from the night before.
I froze, staring at her flushed cheeks and coy smile as she waved goodbye from the doorway. She turned and met my gaze, her smile fading somewhat.
She’d spent the night with him, hadn’t she?
Nausea swept through my gut as I swallowed, praying I was wrong. But how could I be? Here she was, in the same fucking clothes she’d worn on a date last night, and she was only just getting home.
At—I checked my phone—eleven am.
My stomach crashed, and the room spun.
No. Not my Lila…
“Hey,” she said lightly, like she hadn’t just broken my heart into a million pieces.
Lila hummed, then turned to pick up the mail. In her hands she held a thick envelope, and she turned it over before lifting her gaze to meet mine.
I knew before she said anything what it was—and what fucking timing. The universe hated me.
She opened it, pulling out a single page, where I could see ‘ROSSI V ROSSI’ in red writing across the top.
No. Not now.
Lila scanned the page and looked at me. “It’s legal. You’re not my husband anymore.”
I rubbed my chest to subdue the pain there, but it didn’t work. I watched her, looking for any sign of emotion, but she just tucked the paper away, placing it carefully to the side. She wore no expression, just…nothing.
Did she really feel nothing? After all those years of marriage? I’d ruined it, sure, but Lila must feel something. I wanted to ask her, but I’d caused it, so I couldn’t.
My heart splintered into a thousand pieces as I tried to work through all this—Lila staying out all night and the divorce being finalised—but all that happened was my ears ringing.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, as tears streamed down my face. “We should have talked…” I scrubbed a hand over my mouth, my shoulders shaking.
Lila stared at me, her lips still swollen from whatever she’d been doing last night. I couldn’t even think about that. Not now.
She walked over to me, the green material showing the swell of her belly, and I cried harder. For the baby, for Lila, and for what could have been. For fucking it up. She stood in front of me, and her hand lifted, stopping in mid-air.
She didn’t touch me.
I reached out for her, my fingers lacing with hers as I stared into her eyes. Her eyes shone, and she bit her lip, shaking her head.
“Look at me.” I cleared my throat. “I did this to us. Me, not you. You deserve better. I want to be better for you. For our baby. Please…”
“Victor.” Her voice was so soft I barely heard her. “The divorce is final. We aren’t together anymore.”
I squeezed my eyes shut and nodded, still clinging to her hand.
“I’ll do anything, Lila.” I fell to the floor and landed on my knees, looking up at her. “I love you more than I ever thought I did. I hate myself for what I’ve done. I don’t care how long it takes…” I sucked in a breath and gazed at her. “I’ll never stop fighting for us.”
Tears spilled down her cheeks as she pulled her hand back, leaning down so she was almost nose to nose with me. I could smell her perfume, but something else, something I recognised but couldn’t give a name to or I’d die.
I’d literally die.
“Last night, I had sex with someone else.”
No.
I shut my eyes, but she continued talking.
“I hate you for what you did to me. But you’re right; it wasn’t me who caused this. That’s on you. I have to rebuild my life as a single mom at my age, Victor, because you fucked someone else. Repeatedly.”
I opened my eyes, her beauty almost stealing my breath away.
“I know,” I whispered, reaching out to grip her chin. “But I mean it, Lila, I’m not losing you.”
Her eyes searched mine as she shook her head sadly. She’d just told me she’d fucked someone else, and here I was, begging for her to take me back.
“I don’t care what you did. I don’t care. I love you. Isn’t that enough?” I asked her, raw hope stalling my heart rate as she tilted her head, tears flowing down her cheeks.
“Can you imagine what it must feel like to watch the person you’re in love with fuck someone else?”
I shook my head, because no, I could not. But Lila had, because of me.
“Could you watch it, like I did, Victor?”
I bowed my head because I knew I couldn’t. A sob caught in my throat, and she tilted my head back with one finger.
“No. But I’d do anything—”
She interrupted me, her finger swiping over my lower lip.
“Be careful what you wish for.”
Then she walked away, taking the unmistakable scent of sex with her.