Vivian #2
I searched frantically for my axe in the cabin. Theo and I purposely moved it out of sight to avoid triggering bad memories. My chest rose and fell with panicked breaths as I scanned the empty floor.
Nurghle slept soundly on the bed. Oblivious.
Maybe he should be in the hatch. No. If this went poorly…
it was better he be found by someone. Otherwise, he didn’t have any chance of survival.
“What a lucky plant to have been adopted by you.” Was my cat lucky to be here with me?
How did I make sure he came out of this alive, fed, and loved?
No. Stop thinking like that, Viv; it’s not helpful. You need to find the axe now so you can protect him… Theo… your home!
I set my sights on the square hole leading to the attic. Maybe the axe was there.
I yanked myself up the ladder, scrambling as my desperate feet tried to find the wooden rungs. The dim light made it difficult to see, but I shoved boxes around feverishly anyway, hoping a gleam of metal would catch my attention.
The door slammed closed downstairs.
“Theo! Where’s the axe?!” I called down.
No answer.
“Theo?” I asked softly. A shiver ran down my spine. Maybe it wasn’t Theo.
I quietly crawled to the ladder entrance in the floor and peeked downstairs. I didn’t see anyone. My hair toppled into my face as I slowly lowered my head to get a better look. The cabin seemed empty.
I climbed down, quickly scanning both sides of the partition to confirm that I was, in fact, alone.
I was sure I’d left the door open, and now it was definitely closed.
A loud thud sounded outside.
“… Baby…?”
I stepped onto the reed mat at the entrance, turned the doorknob, and pushed. The knob turned, but the door wouldn’t open. I pushed harder. No budge.
“Theo?!” I called, a deep sense of dread crashing through my instinct to stay quiet.
“I love you, Vivian.”
“Theo, what the fuck is this?!” I could barely recognize my own voice as it grew hoarse and shrill, my throat closing with panic.
“You gave me my humanity back. I can never repay you for that gift.”
“Theo, open this door right the fuck now!” My lips began to tremble as I realized what he was doing. Tears clouded my eyes.
Theo was trapping me here. He was about to leave me to go die alone, defending our home.
“You’re the life to my death, and I need you to keep living, my Little Goddess.”
“Don’t do this,” I whimpered. Pounding my fist on the door. “Let me be with you.”
“Please. Hide. I love you so fucking much.”
“I love you too,” I choked, thudding my head against the door and shoving with all my might. “Don’t leave me.” My cheeks became wet quickly without him there to catch my tears.
Silence.
“Theo?”
Silence.
Fear and fury fought for dominance within me.
This wasn’t happening. That wasn’t his pathetic attempt at goodbye.
This was some sick fucked up joke we would laugh at together over dinner because everything would be fine!
Theo had not just left me to face all those bullets by himself.
I wasn’t helplessly trapped in a cabin waiting for everything to come crashing down around me.
There wasn’t an entire organization dead set on ripping us away from each other.
I pushed harder on the door. When that didn’t work, I kicked. Still nothing. I backed up and then charged the stubborn obstacle, my shoulder throbbing with pain when I slammed it into the wood.
I bit my lips to quiet my screams of agony as I continued my effort.
What the fuck did he block me in with? How could there be anything in this universe heavy enough to keep me away from Theo in this moment?
My love for him was stronger than whatever damned object was on the other side of this door. It had to be!
But it wasn’t. Every collision just guaranteed another bruise.
Stumbling to the kitchen window, I looked between the boards of wood just in time to see my love, my husband, my mate, disappearing through the wheat across the field.
I coughed out a sob and tried to crane my neck to see what was blocking me inside. A wooden corner was visible. My heart sank. He’d put a raised garden bed against the door. There was no way I would be able to move several hundreds of pounds of dirt. I needed another escape option.
I began yanking on the planks fixed across the window.
Theo had secured everything in this cabin too fucking well. My fingertips quickly became raw and bloody as I clawed at the metal nails in the boards.
I wasn’t making any progress. I needed a tool.
Frantically searching through our utensil box, I grabbed a fork. Maybe that would work? I shoved its prongs under the head of a nail, pushing and pulling, until the metal handle bent to a ninety-degree angle.
Okay. Fine. Maybe a knife.
The knife failed me, too. Its blade clumsily slipped around the round peg and threatened to stab me whenever I tried prying it back.
Fuuuuuccccckkkkkkk!
I needed to get out of here! I needed to catch up! Do something!
Running out of options and increasingly panicked, I slammed my fist into the wooden boards.
Then my elbow. The planks didn’t budge, but that didn’t stop me from releasing an onslaught of attacks—fists, elbows, my fucking head—trying to create any type of a break.
How could it be so hard?! Didn’t people do this in martial arts? !
The axe would work.
Chilling realization poured over me. The axe wasn’t in here. It never was. Not since that winter. Theo had just needed to get me inside long enough for him to trap me. I wasn’t meant to have a weapon to help him fight, I was meant to hide. Stay safe.
I wanted to be so fucking mad at him for lying and leaving me behind, but instead all I felt was the shattering of my heart.
Every gunshot could be the one to kill my love. The popping was certainly getting louder—closer—coming and going in bursts. Would I feel it in my chest if Theo died? Our pulses had been beating together since we reunited. If his stopped, wouldn't I know?
Nurghle was finally disturbed by the noise. His fur stood on end as he scurried past me, sprinting behind the bathroom door to hide.
I stood at the window and watched between the cruel planks of wood. A line of heads disrupted the natural scenery. The gunfire slowed to a stop. There was nothing for them to shoot now, except for us.
I didn’t fucking care if they shot at me. Where was Theo?! My eyes swept left and right across the approaching crowd, hoping he may be disguised amongst them. He wasn’t.
Oh my god. He must be dead.
My bloodied, shaking hands stilled as I watched the intruders enter my field. My home.
It was over.