Chapter 31 #2
“Damn it,” Yasmine sighed, her face reddening. “I am so fucking in love with you.”
It took several seconds—and the flabbergasted expression on Bella’s face—for Yasmine to realize what she’d said, clapping her hand over her mouth.
And all of a sudden, that grave uneasiness from earlier was in Bella’s expression again.
“Yasmine, wait…”
Yasmine’s stomach bottomed out, her own romantic haze instantly curdling into a cold, frantic panic.
Her brain scrambled to build a defensive wall, assuming the absolute worst. Of course.
Of course she doesn't feel the same way. She’d just dropped a bomb on Bella while they were in the middle of a medical crisis. It wasn’t fair at all.
“I’m sorry, I—forget I said that,” Yasmine stammered, her voice rising an octave as she began to doom-spiral out loud. “I’m just overwhelmed because—well, obviously. You saved my son. You just ushered in a new era of human history. I need a second.”
“Yasmine… I—” Bella started, but the words caught hard in her throat.
Her face twisted into a mask of intense, aching conflict.
“Wait, before we—before I—I just don’t want to confuse you.
I did figure out the solution, but that doesn’t mean Wallace wants to use it.
I might have misunderstood him, but I’m pretty sure he… he wants to stay human.”
The words dropped on Yasmine like the Earth’s weight plummeting back onto her shoulders.
She sat frozen, her hand still hovering near her mouth.
“What?” she said, voice breaking. “What do you mean he doesn’t want it?”
“It should be Wallace who talks to you about this,” Bella said, her voice tight, reaching out a hand as if to steady her. “It’s his choice, and he needs to be the one to—”
“You’re right.” Yasmine pulled her hand back, her mind spinning too fast to focus on anything Bella was saying. Her eyes darted across the room to the makeshift hospital bed. “Is he okay to wake up? Can I wake him up?”
“Yasmine, wait. Don’t do this right now,” Bella insisted, her eyes pleading. “You need to process what we just talked about before you go charging in there—”
“I don’t need to process anything,” Yasmine snapped. She stood up, her entire body trembling. She pushed past Bella. “Dr. Larson! Is he cleared to wake up?”
Dr. Larson, who had been quietly monitoring the equipment nearby, looked up from his clipboard, startled by the sudden spike in volume. He glanced between Yasmine and Bella, narrowing his eyes, before checking the monitor.
“Physically? Yes, his vitals have leveled out. He’s out of danger, just resting deeply from the sedation. It’s safe to bring him out, if you wish.”
Yasmine didn’t wait for another word. She was already at Wallace’s side. She leaned over the guardrail, her hands trembling as she gently shook his uninjured shoulder. “Wallace. Wallace, sweetie, wake up. It’s Mom. Come on, open your eyes for me.”
It took a few agonizing seconds, but Wallace’s eyelids fluttered, groaning softly as he fought his way through the chemical fog. His head rolled on the pillow, his eyes unfocused as they slowly locked onto her face.
“Mom...?” he mumbled, his voice thick and raspy. “Where... what happened?”
“You’re safe, you’re okay,” Yasmine said softly.
She smoothed a stray lock of hair away from his forehead, forcing her voice into a soothing tone that masked the absolute hurricane raging inside her chest. “You’re in the lab.
Bella fixed you up. The Dragomirs are gone.
How are you feeling, baby? Does anything hurt? ”
“No. But I’m also on, like, so much morphine, I think,” he muttered, blinking against the harsh fluorescent lights. “God, my head hurts. I think I might have a concussion.”
“Oh, most definitely. But it’s fine.” Yasmine kept stroking his hair, keeping the gentle maternal front alive for as long as her frayed nerves could possibly manage.
But the weight of Bella’s words was a ticking time bomb in her mind.
Her hand slowed, finally coming to a rest against his cheek.
“Wallace... I need to ask you something.”
“What is it?”
Yasmine swallowed back the lump in her throat, her eyes searching his.
“Why are you refusing immortality?”
Wallace blinked, his breath hitching as the question caught him completely off guard. He opened his mouth, closed it, and stuttered through the haze of his sedation.
“W—what? Mom, how... did Bella tell you?”
“Is it true?” Yasmine pressed, her thumb pressing a fraction harder against his cheek, as if she could hold him to the earth by force alone.
Wallace looked past her for a fleeting second, searching for Bella in the dim light of the lab, before his gaze dropped back to his mother. He swallowed hard, his raspy voice dropping to a quiet, firm line. “Yes. It’s true.”
“Why?” The word tore out of Yasmine, sharp and broken. “Why would you do that, Wallace? Bella has a cure now. A real cure, without any of the shitty vampiric parts.”
“Mom, listen to me—”
“No, you listen to me.” Her voice broke; tears finally spilled over her lashes. “If you stay mortal, you’re choosing to age, you’re choosing to get sick, you’re choosing to die. I don’t understand why you would pick that when you finally have an alternative.”
Wallace’s expression softened. He didn’t flinch at her shouting.
He didn't look angry, or defensive, or even surprised. He just looked… he looked like he did when he was a little boy, and he’d catch her pacing the hallways at three in the morning.
He’d wander out of his bedroom, tug at the hem of her shirt, and ask, “Would you like me to read you a bedtime story, Mom?”
He’d always look for ways to settle her. It shouldn’t have been his job to do that.
Which is maybe why it was even more painful when he nodded once, and said,
“I know, Mom. And I’m sorry. But I don’t think your life improved by it being longer. I think it was just that—longer. And…” He frowned. “Lonelier.”
“It doesn’t have to be lonely,” Yasmine shot back instantly, her heart hammering against her ribs. “Jason can take it too—”
“And what if he doesn’t want to?” Wallace interrupted softly.
“Or what if he does, then someone stakes him through the chest the next day? Immortality isn’t unkillability, Mom.
You should know that better than anyone.
Look at Sylvia’s mom. There’ll be nothing you can do to keep me safe from everything forever unless you lock me in the bunker.
And I’ll be honest, I think that might put a dent in our relationship. ”
He offered her a small, fragile smile, the corners of his eyes crinkling with a weak attempt at humor. But the faint glint of amusement soon faded.
“I don’t know how to phrase this in a way that doesn’t sound stupid and insignificant to you, like you pretty much view everything in my human life, but…
I want to go to work, and sell dental supplies, and get promoted, and maybe become a stupid middle manager, and have some interns that look up to me, and I want to go home and watch reruns of Glee with Jason, and then retire someday.
And then I’ll die. And that’s okay. Dying is okay.
I’m sorry, genuinely, I am—that you’ve been robbed of it. ”
He took in a shuddering breath.
“I like my life,” he said. “And I like who I am. You taught me to.”
Yasmine blinked, a slow, sinking feeling in her stomach. The frantic panic about his mortality momentarily stalled, overwritten by a deep, freezing wave of shame.
My sad, stupid, insignificant human life.
Is that really… how he thought she saw him?
“Wallace…” She grabbed his hand. “I don’t think your life is sad. I never once thought that.”
Wallace let out a weak, breathy huff of a laugh, his crinkling eyes sliding shut as he rolled his head back against the pillow.
“I know, Mom. It’s fine. I’m just messing with you.
You’re a thousand year old supernatural creature with billions of dollars and, like, four different PhDs.
It’s allowed to be a little depressing that I sell root canal equipment. ”
“It is not depressing,” Yasmine pressed.
She leaned over the guardrail, trying to force him to look at her, to see the absolute gravity in her face.
“I am proud of everything you’ve ever achieved.
Do you not remember my closet in Albany?
I still have every notebook that you wrote in from grades one to twelve.
There’s a story in there that you wrote at seven years old about a worm. I re-read it before bed regularly.”
Wallace rolled his eyes, but a winning smile snuck out even so. The expression felt more genuine than anything he’d worn in months.
“You’re incredibly embarrassing.”
“It’s part of being a mother. You might understand it someday if you decide to have your very own human children.”
“Must you put human before everything?”
“Leave me some small concession if I’m going to have to bury my own son.”
Wallace frowned, his hand going slack against hers.
“Mom—”
“It’s fine. I didn’t mean that cruelly. I—” The cold laboratory air turned stifling and thick as a phantom grip clamped down hard around her forearm.
Invisible fingers dug into her shoulders, anchoring her in place.
The Nightmare was coming again, inevitably.
“I just need some time to stare aimlessly at the television.”
Wallace squeezed her hand, smiling at her as he laid his head down on the pillow.
“I love you.”
“I love you more.”
“Don’t be so sure,” Wallace said, closing his eyes, his breath slowing. “You haven’t seen the gift I’m getting you for your 1,198th.”
A tear dripped softly down Yasmine’s cheek.
“Another mug?”
“Another mug,” he laughed. “Better than last year’s, though. This one has a sea urchin.”
They shared a laugh, and she held his hand until he fell asleep again.