Chapter Forty-Eight
We all froze. The words, the voice, it all connected to a deep part of our consciousness that told us to flee. I looked to the door and I saw Rowan standing there, nearly vibrating. “I said get out.” His voice was low, his need burning right under the surface of calm he was trying to project.
Nix and Megan both started to purr. They were content with this choice. Rowan could help with our heat, our need. I tried to stay a little clear of it, but their need lapped at my resolve. I reached for Toya and Wendy. “What should I do?” My whisper broke the thick silence, worry clear in my voice.
Toya turned. “My king, Amy, isn’t in her right mind. Please leave before you both make a mistake.”
His eyes shifted to his wolf and his voice dropped to a level that made my skin shiver. “I won’t take advantage of her.”
“I never said you would. But she might force the…um, potential mating.” Wendy tried to smile.
His eyes met mine and I could see his needs.
It matched my own, and in that moment I was no longer scared.
This is what I wanted. “What happened?” Toya looked to me and I nodded.
I couldn’t form coherent sentences any longer.
My mind, my body focused purely on the need that was running along my skin.
I needed to be touched, licked, kissed. I needed his body next to mine.
Now. My eyes latched onto Rowan. I felt need gather at the apex of my thighs, staring at him.
He was gorgeous. “Kudzu?” That caught my attention.
I realized the conversation had continued when I lost focus.
He walked closer to me and my only thought was to jump up and climb him like a tree.
I needed to get close. “She is this affected by the poison?” Both my friends nodded, but I could remove my eyes from his. “She shouldn’t be this bad.”
“Why not?” Wendy came closer. I think she noticed my hands rubbing the edge of the tub and she could tell I was fighting the need to get out.
“It usually only affects a person who has fully mated with their mate. It is to help couples struggling with fertility.”
Wendy and Toya looked at each other. “She hasn’t mated with anyone yet.”
I watched his face close down before he asked the next question. He was hiding something, and that made it through the fog of need I was feeling. “Has she met someone she wants to mate with yet?”
Toya looked at him a confused looked. “Yes.” She looked at Wendy. His face grew angrier.
“Who?” His one word was a splash of cold water on my face.
“My king…” Toya started, but I stood.
“You can’t be this stupid Rowan.” I could feel the anger rising and it pushed back the need I was entranced by.
His eyes seemed to glow. “Who is it, rabbit?” His voice held an edge, and I wanted to scream. I stood in a rush, water trailing down my mostly naked body, and his eyes glowed. But I was pissed as I turned to my friends.
“Get this idiot out of my house. If he wants to pretend to be this stupid, or for the sake of our realm, I hope he isn’t, but if he is this stupid, I do not want to deal with him at this moment. Get him out.”
Rowan growled, and Toya stepped in front of me, blocking his view.
“My king, I have to ask you to leave.” She pushed him out of the door, and he seemed to want to fight, but then he took a step back.
And then another. I settled back into the freezing water as he left, closing the door behind my air, and I looked up to Wendy.
I could already feel the tears hot trail down my cheeks. “I’m the idiot.” I choked out before her arms came around me.
She rubbed my back and I silently cried before we heard a commotion outside. “You really are that fucking stupid.” We both froze when we heard Toya tore into him.
“What did you just say?” Rowan’s words were dark.
“I’m saying this because I like you. You have grown to be my friend these last months, so I want to give you a fraction of sense.
” I heard a growl come from Rowan, but Toya wasn’t done.
“You are yelling at Amy like this was her fault, but Brandon put kudzu into her drinks, hoping that she would falter and mate him. But you, you come in here and accuse her like she isn’t the victim.
You yell and point fingers because she wants to mate someone.
But you are too stupid to understand that the person she wants to mate with is you!
” There was silence. “But she knows your wolf wants someone else, and she can’t force you to want her back. ”
“What?”
“Don’t play stupid. She has told you this herself. But you always seem to forget!”
That made me stop. He always forgets. Just like he never saw my emails. My texts or calls. I close my eyes and drop my head to my knees. “I am stupid.”
“What do you mean?” Wendy crouched.
“He hasn’t seen any of my calls, my texts, my emails all disappeared.” I turned my face towards her. “I thought it was just someone hacking his stuff. But what if it’s more?”
“More how?”
“What if it’s magic? Or what if it is someone close to him and magic? Because Toya is right. I have made it clear I like him, and now he’s questioning who I want to be with. It doesn’t make any sense.”
“Unless magic is involved…”
I nodded and wiped my face as the door opened again. I closed my eyes and took a breath before I faced him. “It’s me.” His words were soft, and I just nodded. He staggered closer. “Toya said you told me you liked me…”
I bit back a moan as the heat came surging back. I drew in a shaky breath and up, slipping deeper into the water. “Yeah, in a way.”
He looked confused as he came to the edge of the tub, sinking to the floor next to me. “Explain.”
“When you were here last...” I had to stop for a minute, dunking under the cold water to clear my head.
“You told me you liked me, but your wolf wanted someone else. And I told you that you were mine, and I meant it.” I dunked myself again.
“But my wolf also wants someone else. And we both decided forcing our wolves to settle for each other would be cruel.”
“Who does your wolf want?”
“I don’t know who the human is, just the wolf.” I struggled as the heat ate away at my sanity.
“Who is the wolf?”
“Er-” I tried to answer. I did, but the heat surged and I was lost to it.
My mind shattered with need and I was left panting, moaning, splashing the water everywhere.
I slipped deeper into the tub, water closing over my head, cutting off my air.
I tried to scream, but the water slipped past my lips.
“Amy.” He grabbed for me, pulling me from the water before I could drown.
I coughed up a mouth full of water. Then the heat was back, and my mind left me again.
I grabbed his collar, using it to help me gain purchase on him.
I wrapped my arm around his neck and then my lips were on his.
My chains were a passing inconvenience, but I felt him shiver as the wet metal slid against his skin.
His groan was filled with need, and it gave me access to slip my tongue against his. His lips were heaven, and I moaned as I felt his hands move over me. I needed him; I needed him more than air. He pulled back and I cried out. “Please.”
He stared at me, and I saw him warring with himself. “We can’t Amy.”
I started crying. He was right. I knew he was right. “I’m sorry.” I tried to push him away, but his hands tightened on me. “Put me back in the water.”
He shook his head. “I can’t put you in there.”
“If you can’t touch me, if you can’t help relieve me, then put me back in the water.
” I looked up into his eyes. “I can’t think with you here.
I want you. I need your touch.” I watched his eyes widen.
“I crave your skin against mine, your lips, your tongue. I will die without your body against mine, and I know it’s not what you want.
” I angrily swiped at another tear. “I know you don’t want me.
So please, put me back into the water and leave. ”
“I can’t.” He sounded unhinged.
“This is torture. Do you not understand that? This physically hurts me. I ache for you, and you are refusing to help, and I know in my mind it isn’t fair, but right this second, I’m not fair, or rational.
And you are right. I might regret it in the morning.
Not waiting for my mate, but I wouldn’t regret being with you.
” I grabbed his face and kissed his lips one more time.
Then I stood on shaking legs. “Now, before the heat takes over again, I need you to leave. Because you would regret being with me. And that is okay. But it hurts.”
I climbed back into the tub and gasped as the freezing water wrapped around my heated skin once again. “I…I…” I just held up my hand. “It wouldn’t be like that, Amy.”
I looked at him with tears in my eyes, and I watched him track the ones that fell. “You don’t have to lie to make me feel better. You just have to get out.” Then I sank under the water, leaving only my nose above the water. And I waited to hear his steps fade as the heat took me under again.