Chapter 11 #2
When Ross returns to the front of our gathering after the fourth blast of the shocker, his voice is irritatingly upbeat.
“That’s an excellent start. But the real challenge is handling difficult circumstances while you’re having trouble concentrating.
You don’t want to freeze up due to an initial injury or other distress. ”
That sounds reasonable enough. Then he points to the house-sized contraption behind him.
“Now you’ll navigate this obstacle course in sets of five, while the shocker intermittently blares.
” He shoots us a wry smile. “I’ll direct it toward the course so you’re all starting with an equal amount of practice. ”
He tips his head to someone beyond us. A couple of the school nurses have arrived, waiting at the edge of the field.
He thinks some of us aren’t going to make it through the course unscathed, then. Charming.
Byron steps up to volunteer for the first group, because of course he does. He shows no sign of concern as he positions himself by the first set of climbing bars. I can’t suppress a twinge of admiration that quivers through the knot of concern in my chest.
I can’t show either emotion openly. I keep my expression as bland as possible as Captain Ross blows his whistle.
The five students throw themselves onto the course.
Ross only waits a few seconds before switching the shocker on.
He’s turned it so the round area that must work like a speaker is aimed toward the apparatus. Only a faint, jangling buzz niggles at my nerves.
The students still scrambling up the bars flinch. One kid who looks like an 11th year loses her grip and bangs her head against the structure as she falls.
Byron hurtles on, over the top of the broad ladder and into a mess of planks and ropes I can only partially make out from below.
As Ross switches his torture device on and off seemingly at random, I catch glimpses of Byron and the others through the structure. After a couple of minutes, the Worth heir appears on a small platform at the very top, in the lead.
Right as the shocker goes off again.
He’s just reaching for a rope next to a spinning steel disc. Even from a distance, I see the jerk of his hand, the splatter of blood that flecks the boards.
He scrambles on down, holding that hand close to his chest. His body sways; his shoulder smacks the apparatus loud enough that I bite my lip.
My bond wails at me to leap to his side.
I could at least holler out encouragement, couldn’t I? Something that’ll be meaningful to him but disguised as an innocuous comment from a classmate.
I’m groping for the right remark when Stella nudges me. “Are you okay? You look like you’re getting pretty wrapped up in this.”
Her words hit me like a splash of icy water. I drop my gaze with a giggle I hope doesn’t come out too wobbly. “Just picturing us going through that thing. Let’s get it over with. Next turn?”
I can’t admit it’s Byron I’m worried about. Can’t act like he’s anything other than my rival. Fucking careless of me to let this much concern show.
Get it together, Elodie. Focus on what’s best for them, not my own anxieties.
My friends and a 16th year guy join me at the start of the course while Ross and Jovak talk with the first round about their performance—and the nurses heal up several minor wounds. A renewed thread of tension twists through my innards.
What if I get hurt while I’m going through this exercise? What if it’s bad enough to really hurt someone else?
Or for everyone here to realize what my glim is?
I hate that the last problem feels worse than the others.
I sink into the mental state that got me through the earlier blares of the shocker. When Ross blows his whistle again, I clamber up the bars with no thought other than getting through the course as quickly and safely as possible.
Madison and I pull ahead of the others. We leap over a spinning log and squirm up a tunnel with jagged handholds, climb a net that billows with an artificial gale and dodge a swinging beam.
Whenever the shocker goes off, I purposefully slow my movements until I’m totally centered. I make it to the top platform just behind Madison, and a little relief starts to unfurl inside me.
Then I skid down to the second level, and hit the ground at the same moment the next blast washes over us.
The platform I landed on wasn’t as flat as I thought. My foot slants at an odd angle, and my ankle twists.
I yank myself out of sight down an undulating passage and throw what’s left of my attention at the 16th year guy somewhere above me with a silent apology.
My glim floods my ankle with soothing warmth. A grunt sounds above, and the guy stumbles with a yelp.
A thorn of guilt pokes deep into my gut.
He’ll be okay. A minor injury, easy for the nurses to patch up.
I just have to get through this exercise without hurting anyone else.
In my final descent, I scrape my elbow, so shallowly and suddenly I can’t even tell who my glim steals its healing energy from. I stagger to the ground in front of our instructors.
Jovak looks me over. “Do you need a nurse, Miss Devine? It looked like you had a tricky landing up there.”
I fake a laugh and shift my weight as if testing my legs. “No, I think I’m okay. Just glad to be done.”
I walk back to the larger group, and the first thing I see is a couple of 14th years clustered around Asher.
“So your brother’s good at divination and you’re good at this kind of thing?” one of them is saying with a coy smile.
The other primps her hair and grins. “Brilliance does run in families. You’ve been keeping it quiet.”
A flare of possessive anger roars into being in my chest. I take a step toward them, hands clenching, ready to toss them away from my match.
Cadance’s laughter behind me stops me in my tracks.
I can’t.
Not even just because of the charade we’re putting on. Because after I activate Asher’s glim for him, he should probably find another partner—one who won’t have to worry about hurting him every time she’s near him. He deserves better than that.
Better than me.
Better than…
We sprawl on our backs on the grass, gazing up at the stark blue sky in our secluded nook in the park. Asher passes over one of the bottles of lemonade we bought, and I prop myself up on my elbow to take a sip without choking.
As I flop back down, he tilts his head to one side. “Do you wonder much what your match will be like?”
My pulse wobbles in an uncomfortably giddy way. I’ve wondered a lot whether I could hope that my best friend will turn out to be my match—but I could never admit that. It would make everything so awkward.
And… shouldn’t I hope fate links him to someone who can elevate him to better circumstances rather than another pariah like me?
I shrug to cover my reaction. “I guess everyone must, right? But it’s still more than five years away. Hard to imagine ‘settling down.’”
With anyone other than the boy beside me, that is.
I look at Asher, but he keeps gazing at the sky.
“What do you think about it?” I have to ask.
The soft smile that touches his lips sends a gentler flutter through my veins. “Fate probably does the best it can. But… if it doesn’t get things quite right, we still have choices. We know how we’ll be happiest better than anyone, right?”
My mouth goes dry. I want to think he’s saying that he’d pick me even if we’re not fated… but should I even want that?
Before I can sort out the turmoil in my head, he sits up and grabs his own lemonade. “That Illusion test was killer, wasn’t it?”
The change of subject brings a rush of relief. I don’t want to have my dreams punctured just yet, even if they’ll have to be later.
“The worst,” I agree with a laugh. “But at least ours weren’t the worst. Did you see that mess Dahlia came out with?”
I shake away the memory with an echo of the words resonating through me. As I take my spot at the back of the crowd, the clashing giggles of Asher’s flirty companions stir another surge of jealous fury.
I clench my jaw against the sensation.
I knew he needed more than I could give him in both realities I’ve been a part of. I should be glad I wasn’t the death of him in this one. That has to be enough.
My friends fall into place around me, Madison brushing herself off, Stella giving a little shudder.
“I hope it doesn’t get any worse than this,” she says.
Something in me cracks. The words pop out before I can think them through. “Yes, wouldn’t want to have to face any real struggle in your life.”
Stella blinks at me, her mouth freezing half open. The other girls stare.
I stiffen too, on the verge of chuckling and pretending it was a joke.
But it wasn’t.
I wanted to poke at my friends, didn’t I? See if I can provoke them into revealing any hint of a conspiracy against me.
Why not now?
I wave toward the obstacle course. “This is only the first challenge, and you’re already complaining. What the hell do any of you know about what’s actually hard?”
Cadance scoffs, her tone bored. “And you do, Elodie? Come on.”
My head ticks toward her. “I know better than you. I had to fight for my life, didn’t I?” More than once, but they don’t know that.
“Elle,” Madison starts.
I yank my attention to her. “You pretend like you’re too good for all this, but I bet you’d be terrified if anyone threw you into a real fight instead of just a sparring match.
And you.” I focus on Stella again. “You talk like you believe in our duty as lucents to protect the rest of the world, but as soon as the going gets tough for you, all that matters is letting someone else do the heavy lifting.”
Stella’s expression shutters, her eyes dulling, her lips pursing. Without a word, she turns away from me and walks off around the crowd.
The other two girls keep staring at me.
I swallow hard, more guilt blooming in my stomach. But nothing I said was a lie.
These friends aren’t really my friends. I don’t need them—they never helped Other Elodie either.
All that matters is getting to the bottom of this mystery, one way or another, before my matches and I end up dead.