Texts with Peter Friday Night

Maria: We’re streaming a movie in Nava’s room, so get over here, Peter

Peter: What movie?

Maria: Australia

Peter: ???

Maria: The Baz Luhrmann film from 2008 with Kidman and Jackman

Maria: Nava worked on it, so she can tell us any sordid behind-the-scenes gossip

Peter: Oh, yeah

Peter: Didn’t that movie have a lot of

Maria: A lot of what

Peter: Cows?

Maria:... I guess?

Maria: I mean, the story’s apparently about a cattle station and a cattle drive, so I’d assume a certain number of cows are on-screen

Maria: Why?

Peter: Maybe I’ll skip this one

Maria: Do you... have an issue with cows?

Peter: Of course not, don’t be ridiculous

Maria: Let’s explore this, shall we

Peter: No

Maria: Did cows kidnap your daughter, and you had to track her down using your very particular set of skills, which make you a nightmare

for cattle like them

Peter: Maria. Really.

Maria: Maybe a bovine temptress left you at the altar, heartbroken and heiferless

Peter: MARIA

Maria: Perhaps a bull wrongfully accused you of a crime you didn’t commit

Maria: When the murderer was really the One-Hoofed Holstein all along

Peter: . . . I knew we shouldn’t have watched The Fugitive last week, Taken was bad enough

Maria: Did you lose your life savings because you invested in a cow’s pyramid scheme

Maria: Bernie Moodoff

Peter: Are you done now

Maria: Depends on whether you’re coming to Nava’s room

Peter: I’m staying in mine, so have a nice night

Maria: Nope

Peter: Nope?

Maria: You owe me, Reedton

Peter: Oh, really?

Maria: Really

Peter: Enlighten me, Ivarsson

Maria: Today, when Cassia and Cyprian stripped down to wash their clothing in the shallows, I rescued you from that big wave before it dragged you under and you were forced to meet Ariel’s entire dysfunctional family and sing songs with talking crabs

Maria: I basically saved your life, even though it meant flashing the crew

Maria: Not that I really care who sees my nipples, but still

Maria: You were so into the scene, you didn’t notice the wave coming, so yes, you owe me

Peter:...

Peter: Yes

Peter: That’s why I didn’t notice the wave

Peter: I was just completely into the scene, you’re right

Peter: Fine

Peter: I’ll watch the damn movie, as long as you never bring up today’s incident again

Peter: I’m trying very hard to forget it

Maria: ???

Maria: The wave traumatized you that much?

Peter:...

Peter: Make like Elsa and let it go, Maria

Maria: Fine, but only if you get here in the next two minutes

Peter: On my way

Maria:

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