Chapter 14 #2
I switch the phone between my hands and bring it to my other ear.
Suddenly, I’m not sure how to approach the topic of Brooks.
I’d really like to just leave it alone altogether, but I told him I’d put in a good word with Drew.
It was my side of the bargain. And if I want him to follow through with his promises, which I do, then I have to make good on mine.
“So,” I say, taking a steadying breath, “how’s the new job?”
“There will be a formal announcement on Wednesday, I think. Maybe Thursday. There’s still paperwork being finalized, but then I’m expected to take the seat starting a week from Monday.”
“That sounds fun. What is it, exactly, you’ll be doing? I don’t think you’ve said.”
“Back bedroom,” he says to someone else. “Sorry, Aud. I’ll be on the NAFL Combat Commission. It’s a four-year term. But I’m also opening a gym out here in the meantime.”
I nod as my heart starts to race. This sounds exactly like what Brooks was describing—a commission that gets to decide if he fights again or not. Great.
“In a very strange turn of events, I know someone who I think you’ll be … encountering soon,” I say, choosing my words carefully.
“Really? Who?”
“Brooks Dempsey.”
“What?” His tone is so icy that I flinch. “How the hell do you know that piece of shit?”
I curl my nose at his crudeness. “We met recently.”
He laughs, but there’s no humor in it. At all. “Stay away from him, Audrey.”
“Why?” I ask with a bit more attitude than is probably helpful.
“Because Brooks Dempsey is a no-good motherfucker, that’s why. I don’t need to go into any more detail than that.”
Wow. I force a swallow, trying to wrap my head around the direction of this conversation because I was wrong. Drew hates Brooks. My brother isn’t usually so nasty. And even though I’m aware that there are people who don’t like him, he’s never been so vicious about anyone in front of me.
Then again, I’ve never brought someone up from his world like this, either.
The urge to push back against his vitriol is strong because he’s so wrong about Brooks. It’s as if we don’t know the same man, and it makes no sense to me.
“I would appreciate it if you’d go into more detail,” I say as nicely as I can.
“How the hell did you meet this asshole on your sabbatical or whatever you’re calling it now?”
I stop in my tracks. “That’s not very nice, Andrew.”
“The world isn’t a nice place, but I thought you knew that.” He snorts haughtily, like I’m too na?ve to see the truth of my position. “He’s a fucking narcissist, Audrey. Stay away from him.”
Narcissist? Brooks? I bite my tongue instead of pointing out that if either of them displays signs of a profound lack of empathy or apparent extreme self-importance in this situation, it’s not Brooks.
“That’s not been my experience with him,” I say slowly. “He’s a friend of Gray’s—Astrid’s boyfriend. We met randomly, and I assure you it wasn’t premeditated or whatever you’re thinking.”
“Like I believe that.”
“I don’t know what to tell you then.” I stop walking as my irritation grows. “What do you think happened? Do you think he went out of his way to meet me to screw with you?”
His lips smack together in displeasure, and I can imagine his jaw tensing on the other end of the phone.
We’ve had our battles over the years, but I’ve never really stood up to him.
It’s never been worth it—always easier to just let things go.
And it might be easier this time, too, but I can’t just let him talk trash about Brooks like that. It’s unfair and it’s mean.
“He’s done worse, I’ll put it to you like that,” Drew says.
“You just tossed out the word narcissist, and if I’m applying it to this conversation, there’s one clear winner. And it’s not Brooks.”
He laughs angrily as my blood boils. “Look, Audrey, I know you try to see the good in everyone because you’re a sweetheart, but there’s nothing good in Brooks Dempsey, okay?”
I’m rooted to the ground in a stunned silence. When did my brother get so cold? And when did he start talking to me like I’m a child?
I lick my lips, and the wind dries them right away. I should hurry back to the cabin because time is ticking—Brooks will be here to get me any minute—but this feels important. For so many reasons.
“You’re wrong this time. Truly,” I say. “I’ve spent a lot of time with him recently and I—”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Drew!” I gasp, shocked at his hateful tone. I’ve heard him speak to other people like this, but he’s never used this with me. It’s disorientating. I place a hand against my chest as if the pressure of my palm will somehow ease the tension settling against my ribs.
“Look, I gotta go. I have a lot of shit on my hands that I need to take care of. But you are not to see Dempsey again. Do you understand? I mean it.”
“No, I don’t understand. What you’re saying doesn’t match my experience and, while I appreciate your concern, I’m afraid you aren’t listening to me.”
“I’m not getting into this with you.”
There’s something about the way he says this—like I’m supposed to heed his demands because he doled them out—that rubs me the wrong way.
“In epistemology, direct evidence often outweighs personal testimony,” I say clearly. “Seeing something that you can verify usually carries more weight than hearing someone explain it.”
“This isn’t the time to be cute, Audrey.”
Okay, now I’m mad. “I’m sorry that you find reasoning and analysis cute.”
“Will you stop? This is ridiculous. What’s gotten into you?”
He sighs as if he’s disgusted with me. The sound ripples through my mind and dips into my heart, piercing it with a tiny jab.
The fact that he could be disgusted with me over something like this makes me second-guess every interaction we’ve ever had.
It also makes me wonder about his other interactions.
What did happen between him and Brooks?
“He treats women like they’re a joke,” Drew says finally. “I don’t want that happening to you.”
“Don’t you do that?”
“Are you fucking serious?”
I wasn’t, but now I am—because that is what Drew does. It’s what all his friends do. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. I’ve experienced it, too.
LOL Look, you’re an amazing girl and so sweet. But I don’t think we’re really compatible like that. Sorry, babe.
It was the look in Seth’s eyes that sealed the deal. He thought I was a joke then, just like I am to Drew right now. And the realization stings.
“Stay the fuck away from him,” Drew says as if that’s the end of the conversation. “Now, I gotta go. Stop loitering with the trash, Audrey.”
The call ends before I can comment back.
I stare at the darkened screen, trying to process what just happened.
I feel like I’m in an alternate reality, or else the reality I’ve lived in up until this moment hasn’t been real.
I’ve never seen Drew behave or speak this way.
So, why is he acting like such a fool now? Because he’s not getting his way?
The things he said about Brooks are in exact opposition to the things I know about him, and when pressed to give me examples, Drew couldn’t.
In the past, I wouldn’t have argued with him and simply heeded his advice.
But now? Now it feels like an assault on my intelligence.
It feels … dirty. He referred to my doctoral knowledge as cute.
That’s definitely hedging toward asshole behavior, something I’ve never considered my brother.
Standing in the middle of Blackbird Ranch, surrounded by rolling fields and endless sky, I’m strangely calm.
I check the time on my phone and then open my text app.
Me: Hey, Mom! I’m not going to have service for a few days. Just wanted to give you a heads-up before I go off the grid. I’m fine and will call you when I return. Love you.
I silence notifications from her, Dad, and my brother.
Then I head back to the cabin wondering how I’m going to hold up my end of the bargain and convince Drew to help get Brooks’s license back. Oof.