Chapter 24
CHAPTER
TWENTY-FOUR
Audrey
“I love how this cabin smells the same every time you walk in,” I say, carrying my computer bag while Brooks follows me to the bedroom with the rest of my travel gear.
“Oh, yes. Apples and cinnamon. It’s an Adler classic.”
I raise a brow as we deposit my stuff onto the bed and then head back into the kitchen.
“Gray and Hartley’s mom always burned apples and cinnamon candles or used the air spray things.
I don’t know. But it’s the scent I associate with the Adlers.
” He blows out a breath as the stress that he used to hide so well makes a comeback.
“I think it’s kind of great that they keep up the tradition. ”
“Probably makes them feel close to their parents.”
Brooks shrugs. “Come here and let me get my arms around you for a minute before I have to go.”
He doesn’t have to ask me twice. I fall into his arms, nuzzling against his chest as he envelops me. My eyes fall shut, and I breathe in spicy cologne mixed with fresh laundry scent that I’ve grown to associate with a dopamine hit.
I swallow against him, my mind unable to distract it from the single lingering thought it’s toyed with all day. What happens now? We haven’t discussed it or even broached it, really. The only conversation we’ve directly shared about this side of the getaway was in the bar.
“That means that for the next week, you’re mine. But we’ll do it in a way that makes it easy to walk away when the time comes.”
Those words were a beacon of hope when he uttered them last week. Today, they’re about as comforting as a knife shoved between my ribs.
I’m so out of my league here that I don’t know how to act or what to say. He knows I want to see him again. I’m ninety-nine percent sure he wants to see me again, too. So, what’s with the dramatic departure like we’ll never see each other again?
A lump settles in my throat as I try to channel my inner Gianna.
“Okay,” he says, blowing out a resigned breath.
He kisses the top of my head and then pulls away.
“I gotta pick up Otis from Jasper’s because he and Markie are going to visit Mia for a couple of days.
And I need to return a shit ton of phone calls and texts that I’ve been ignoring since someone turned into a sex goddess. ”
I tuck my chin and giggle. “Well …”
He heads for the door, and I follow, mildly more comfortable with this than I was two minutes ago. But it’s still a little nerve-racking.
“What day is it? Wednesday?”
I nod. “Yes.”
He pulls the door open, letting the cool breeze infiltrate the cabin. “How about I come by in the morning? I’m sure you have a bunch of stuff to catch up on, too.”
“Yeah.” Nothing that I couldn’t do while sitting on the couch with you … or on you. My stomach churns in disapproval of his plan. “Definitely.”
Brooks starts to walk out but stops before his shoe hits the porch. He pauses, his head hung, before he faces me. His eyes are wary, his lips pressed in a thin line, and it’s not a good look for me.
“I can only speak for myself,” he says slowly. “But I really didn’t expect to come home feeling like this.”
“Well, I can speak for myself and say that I didn’t either.”
Slowly, a lopsided grin graces his kissable lips. “Let’s catch up on life and clear our brains, and then we talk about this tomorrow. Sound good?”
“Yeah. Sounds great.”
He steps onto the porch.
“Hey!” I say, catching his attention one last time.
He looks at me over his shoulder. “Yeah?”
“I’m going to be in a black lace mood tomorrow. Just so we’re on the same page.”
Brooks turns away from me before I can see the smirk that I’ll guarantee is written on his face. But the breeze is too chilly to watch him walk to his truck. So, I close the door and miss proving myself right.
The cabin is so quiet. I can’t help but wonder if it’s always been this quiet or if it just seems that way because I’ve been with Brooks for the last few days.
He certainly makes the world more colorful, so it makes sense that he could make it noisier, too.
But this silence—the very thing I came to the cabin to enjoy—feels empty. Hollow. Terribly lonely.
I find my computer and carry it to the kitchen table. Then I grab my phone and bring it over, too. Quickly, I scan my inbox, delete spam, and tag each remaining message into groups. Students first. I open the top email while I call Astrid.
“You’re alive!” she says, laughing instead of a traditional greeting. “So, how was it? Give it to me in five adjectives.”
I laugh, too. “Five adjectives, huh? Let’s see … I’d go with huge, spicy, hard, frequent, and bliss.”
“Damn.”
“Listen, I don’t know what sex is like for most people, because I only know what it was like for me with the other guys I’ve slept with. But Astrid—this is a whole new level. It’s a whole new world.”
“I was going to ask if you enjoyed yourself, but that’s been answered. So, tell me things. Where did you go? What happened?”
Sitting back, I sigh happily. “We went about an hour or so south to a house on a lake. It was small, but the view was immaculate. And there was a little town I’ve never heard of just a few minutes away.
That’s where we ate a few times, had groceries delivered from there, and did some shopping. It was just an amazing time.”
“You sound happy, Auddie.”
“Consider this verbal cartwheel emojis,” I say, laughing.
“Have you talked to Gianna?”
“No.” I sigh. “I love her, but she’s a bloodhound. I probably had sex in ten different positions over the last few days. She’ll somehow sense it and make me relive every tiny detail—which I’m not averse to doing—but I just need to decompress for a minute first.”
“Understandable.”
I type out a response to the first student’s email and hit send.
It’s only now that I’m alone and in a place I’m familiar with that I can truly process my time with Brooks. Surprisingly, it’s not the words he used with me, or the ways he fucked me all over that house that sit atop the things that come to mind from our trip.
What stands out most is how alive I feel.
Things feel softer, smoother, sharper. The air smells crisper and stronger than it did before I left. Sounds, even the silence, are louder than they were before, and the cabin is even more welcoming.
Best of all? I did it. I didn’t stay complacent and accept the drudgery of my days as they were. I became the main character of my life again, and I’m proud of that.
“When are you coming home?” Astrid asks. “Do you know? If not, it’s fine. I’m just curious when we’ll see each other again.”
“I have to fly to Boston on Saturday.”
“Why?”
“Dad’s birthday.” I start to tell her about Drew and Brooks but stop before I can spill the beans—beans she might already know. “It’s a whole … thing.”
“Is everything okay?”
Astrid asks the question with the gentleness of someone who understands how complicated my relationship with my parents can be.
She’s served as my sounding board more times than I can count.
If I ever need to rob a bank or get out of a speeding ticket, I’ll call Gianna.
For anything logical, I’m calling Astrid.
“Can I rain check this conversation?” I ask. “I just don’t want to get into the weeds about it right now.”
“Of course.”
A call beeps in, and I see Drew’s name on the screen. My stomach sours.
“Astrid, Drew’s calling, and we’re sort of in the middle of something,” I say, leaving it at that. “Can I call you later?”
“Sure thing. Love you. And I am so proud of you, my little badass friend.”
I smile. “Thanks. I love you, too.” I wait for her call to end before I accept Drew’s. “Hey.”
“Hey, Aud.”
There’s no tell in his tone, no hint as to how this conversation will go. I’m still shocked that our last chat went so horribly wrong. Maybe he was just stressed, and he’s calling to apologize.
“How are you?” I ask, playing it neutral.
“Okay. Been better, been worse. Never been busier though.” He chuckles. “I’m so damn busy that I started keeping a calendar.”
I laugh. “Well, that’s saying something because I never dreamed you, of all people, would keep a calendar like a dork.”
“Easy, easy.” He sighs as the tension between us begins to relax. “What day are you flying home?”
I sit back in my seat, clicking open another student email. Drew’s question sounds harmless, a typical question you might ask a family member, but it’s not. He’s fishing for information and trying to be sly about it.
It’s too bad that I’ve watched him use this tactic on so many people in my lifetime … including me. I’m only realizing it now. Do I really know my brother at all?
That thought has been bouncing around in my head for days, and I don’t have an answer.
“Saturday,” I say, considering what I share before I say it. “I leave here pretty early, and I’ll be there by lunchtime.”
“Need a ride from the airport? I’m getting in around ten thirty and have a car picking me up to take me to Mom’s.”
Ah-ha! I get to my feet because, somehow, sitting feels like I have the weaker hand. Drew wants to know if I’m coming alone because he knows if I had a plus-one, I’d never let him pick us up.
“No, thank you,” I say sweetly. I hesitate, then figure, why not? “I’m staying at Ruma this time.”
“The hotel?”
“Yes. They just opened it a couple of months ago, and everyone’s raving about it. Fenton Abbott is supposedly the world’s biggest luxury hotelier, and the Boston hotel is getting rave reviews. Felt like a good way to spend my money.” And time, but I’m not going into that.
He hums, thrown off by my answer—as designed.
“Is that it?” I ask. “I have a bunch of stuff to catch up on before I leave for the weekend.”
“You’re never behind. What’s going on?”
It’s another pointed poke into my story to see if he can get whatever information he’s after …
information about Brooks. He’s not mentioned him, but I know Drew well enough to know he didn’t forget him, either.
He’s playing a set of cards in his trademark Machiavellian way.
I normally overlook him because it never really affected me, but I think I’m over that.
“Why don’t you come out and ask me what you’re after?” I ask, amused by using Brooks’s words on Drew. If my brother knew exactly how Brooks was using that phrase on me this week …
“What do you mean?” he asks.
“You don’t care why I’m behind or if I need a ride from the airport or what time I’m getting in. So, just ask what you want to know so we can move on.”
He takes an irritated breath. “Talked to Dempsey in a while?”
“Do you know what, Andrew? That’s none of your business. And while I appreciate your concern, please know that I did listen to it and evaluated it, but my decisions are my own.”
“So, that’s a yes?”
I sigh. “Honestly? I don’t know what’s going to happen, if anything, between Brooks and me. That’s the truth. And regardless of what that answer is, I’d hope that you could set aside whatever grievances you have with him for the benefit of your little sister. Because I’d do that for you.”
The line is quiet for a while. I’d think he hung up if his name wasn’t glowing on the screen.
“You’re right,” he says, his tone lighter. “I’m sorry, Aud. I never should have pulled you into this. We’re family before anything else.”
“Apology accepted,” I say, pleasantly surprised. “Thank you for not being a brat about this.”
“There can only be one brat in the family, and you have that on lockdown.”
“Funny. Now, are you done? I have work to do.”
“Yeah, I’m done. Be good. Be smart. And I’ll see you on Saturday.”
“See ya then. Bye.”
“Later.”
I flop back in my seat with the widest, most relieved grin of my life.
Things are finally coming together.
I take a breath, feeling a peace settle over my soul.
If Anna had lived, how different would our dynamic have been with three siblings and not two? Would Drew be as thoughtlessly reckless? Would I have been so quiet and reserved? Would she have been the gel that bound us together? That soothed the rough edges?
What would she have thought about my time with Brooks? I stretched myself emotionally and physically while we were away, but I also pushed myself to be firmer and bolder with Drew, too.
I’m proud of myself.
And I think Anna would be proud.
Whimsy List: Updated
Have a one-night stand.
ORGASM! (with a man)
Wear a bold lipstick.
Buy more lingerie (and wear it often).
Stop being sweet.
Learn to flirt.
Take a self-defense class.
Get a tattoo.
Sleep in the dark without being scared.
Cut my hair.
Learn to be okay if others are disappointed (even if it’s in me).
Eat alone in public.
Do something spontaneous.
Make Anna proud.
Learn how to give a blow job.