Chapter 31
CHAPTER
THIRTY-ONE
Audrey
“So, what happens now?” I ask, sticking a toe out of the bubbles.
We’ve refilled the bath water three times. Each time, Brooks says it’s still warm enough, and I vehemently disagree. Hot baths are one thing I won’t compromise about. It might be the only thing.
He folds his hands around me, resting them on my belly. My head is tucked against his chest as we relax in the tub. A pizza box sits on a chair within reach, our phones are off, and the world is back on its axis.
“I don’t know,” he says. “What do you want to happen?”
“I’ve been thinking about that a lot.”
“So? What did you figure out?”
He splashes water onto my chest as he does every so often. I can’t tell if he’s trying to ensure that I’m warm or if he likes the way the water drips off my nipples. Either way, it’s soothing.
“I had ruled this out as of yesterday,” I say. “But it’s back on the table.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I really like Sugar Creek. Everyone is so nice there, and it’s so … slow. There’s no real hustle or bustle. I think it would be a really nice place to live.”
He nods. “Well, I’m in the market to buy or build a house. It might be too soon for us to go that far, but if you want to look at plans with me and give your two cents, I’d think that was pretty cool.”
“It might be too soon for us to talk about living together, but is that something you’d be into at some point?”
He chuckles, pressing a kiss in my hair. “Let me put it to you this way. I’m just trying not to scare the shit out of you. I’d love to build a house that you love as much as I do and, you know, at some point down the road, maybe we could have a family there.”
This shouldn’t make me cry, but it does.
Hot tears stream silently down my face, and I take a moment to just be thankful.
I’m thankful for him, for perspective with my mother, for being able to be in a place where I can see the beauty of what’s around me.
It turns out that it wasn’t just Brooks who needed to let the past go to move into the future. I did, too.
“I’d have a kid or three with you,” I say.
His cock hardens against my back, making me laugh.
“No odd numbers,” he says. “We can have one, which I know is an odd number, but it gets an exception. Or two, four, or six. I don’t care.”
“I’ve always wanted three, so I guess I could bump that to four.”
He splashes me gently again. “There’s a piece of land for sale out by the ranch. Fifty acres or so. The back corner touches Hart’s land.” Another splash. “The creek runs through it, and there’s a pond that we used to sneak over to when we were younger and fish.”
“You don’t have to try to sell it to me.”
“I just wanted to see if it’s something you might be interested in.”
I lean to the side and twist my neck so I can see his handsome face. What I see steals my breath.
My grandmother used to have a picture on her wall of a Bible verse boasting that love is patient, kind, not proud—that it never fails. I walked by that a million times growing up and never understood it. How could one thing be all those things at the same time?
I always thought I’d have to choose, that people were a mix of those qualities, and you couldn’t find them all in one man.
Little Audrey was wrong. You can find them all in one person.
Maybe they’re not all especially visible every day, and maybe some are stronger than the others.
But what I see when I look at the way Brooks looks at me is so pure, so good that my heart almost explodes.
It won’t always be like this. Bad days will come. Challenges will erupt out of nowhere. The hard times will fall. But that doesn’t scare me as it has in past relationships. I don’t feel vulnerable with him. I feel stronger. And that’s incredible.
“When we get back to Sugar Creek, I’d love to look at the land,” I say. “It sounds great.”
“When do you fly back?”
“Tomorrow. What about you?”
He grins. “One-way ticket. I wasn’t leaving without you.” He presses a kiss to my forehead.
“Hey, do you know what we could do? We could rent a car and drive back. That would be fun.”
“I have nowhere to be, so great. Let’s do it.” He settles me against him again. “Are you coming to Sugar Creek then? I wasn’t sure if you were staying in Nashville. Hartley said you took all your stuff when you left.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t want to be there if I didn’t have you. But Astrid and Gray won’t be back until rugby is over, so I’m free to use the cabin for a couple of months.”
“Or,” he says, “you could just stay with me. I mean, Otis must approve first because I can’t just bring strays in off the streets without his approval.”
I giggle.
“But if you bring a hot dog with you, I think you’ll be golden,” he says.
“A hot dog? For a cat?”
“Blame Jasper.” He groans. “He’s my cat sitter. Clearly, not a good one. But Otis gets a bad rap for being an orange cat. And the one time my mom watched him, he got out of her house and went on a bender with Blooper, and it was traumatic for all involved.”
He drips a handful of water onto my chest and watches it trickle back into the bath.
“Have you given any thought about what you’re going to do now that you’re in retirement?” I ask, still surprised that he walked away from fighting. “That seemed to come out of nowhere, so I just wondered if you had a plan or were being spontaneous.”
“I’ve not thought about it directly very much, but it’s been in the back of my mind now.
My heart hasn’t been in it for a while now.
” He sinks deeper into the water. “I don’t actually need the money.
As long as I’m not buying yachts—well, I couldn’t afford a yacht—but if I’m not blowing it just to blow it, I’ll be fine.
I have a good money guy who makes sure I’m set up.
” He snorts. “And my mom. If I buy too much at the grocery store, she’s complaining about wasting money.
And now you.” He squeezes me. “I’ll buy you whatever I damn well want. ”
I smile, pulling his arms tighter around me.
“Alfie always needs help,” he says. “He’s getting old. He’s hinted around about selling it a few times, but nothing serious. Just running his mouth, mostly, when he’s pissed. But in a couple of years, I think he’ll want to part with it, and that might be something I’m into.”
“And then our hypothetical kids can train there.”
“With Gray and Hartley’s hypothetical kids.” He pauses. “And Jasper’s but Jasper is kind of a pussy about shit, so they might play hopscotch or something instead.”
I laugh. “That’s not nice.”
“Hey, it’s the truth. But what about you? Can you still teach from Sugar Creek?”
“Yes, I can, if I want to. But I might take a bit of time off and explore other things.” I look over my shoulder at him. “I have one of those money people, too.”
He snorts. “I was at the party tonight. I gathered that.”
I don’t know what I want to do for certain, but I know it’ll be okay. Just because I have a doctorate in one thing doesn’t prohibit me from doing something else. I own it. It doesn’t own me. And it’s taken me a long time to understand that.
The older I get, the more I understand that life is a continuous roller coaster.
It’s not what I expected when I went into college to earn my degree, find a job, and love it until I die.
That’s highly unrealistic. Possible, but the exception, I’d say, rather than the rule.
But as the roller coaster dips and dives, rises and falls, as long as your cart is safely on the tracks, surrounded by good people, good food, and enough fun, you can enjoy the ride.
And, oh, what a ride it’s been.
I grin.
And I bet it’s about to get even better.