Chapter Thirty-Eight
KALLEN
It’s been a week and five days since I’ve been unemployed.
So far, I’ve applied for eleven jobs. I’m getting pretty desperate, considering I have limited money left.
I have to secure something in the next four weeks, otherwise I’ll have to break the lease on my apartment and move in with Mumma Anika.
Which might not be a bad thing, since I wouldn’t have to worry about seeing Dan.
Over the past week, I’ve managed to steer clear of him by keeping my movements to a minimum outside of work hours and only leaving my apartment during work hours – when he’s at the office.
I know this isn’t a sustainable way of living. And I’m starting to discover this thing between Dan and me isn’t something I can just scoop up and leave in a pile in the laundry – like I sometimes do my recycling.
There have been moments over the last few days when I’ve heard his door open and close outside, and I’ve been tempted to open mine to talk to him.
I miss him, more than I care to admit, even to people like B lake, who’s been calling me every afternoon to see what I’ve been up to, and to tell me about the trashy new Tea Time venture at Untold, which kind of makes me miss the place even more.
I miss the scent of the cologne he uses – woody, with a hint of vanilla. I miss his smile, his playfulness. His eyes, the colour that resembles some of the best memories I’ve had this year, let alone my whole life.
Fuck it.
What’s the worst that could happen if I message him? Worst-case scenario: it’s too late and I move on. Best-case scenario: I get a second chance.
Even if it ends up being the former, at least I get to see my best friend perform at Euphoria tonight.
And so, I finally write a message to him that won’t be deleted this time:
Hey Dan, I’m sorry about how things went down between us. Would you be up for having a chat sometime?
Sent at 12:12 p.m., the time I was born.
Deep breaths.
At the same time, an email pops up on my screen. It’s from Coast to Coast , a travel magazine I applied for an editor position at.
They want to get me in for an interview.