Chapter 28
SAVANNAH
Awave of nausea swells in my belly as my breathing becomes deeper and more rapid. I can’t take my eyes off the gold daisies.
I’ll never be rid of him. He’ll follow me wherever I go. Even when he’s dead, his name, his memory, his sins, I’ll always be the daughter of John the Baptist.
“We found them,” Luke answers.
His reply jerks me out of my own head as his words register.
“You went through my dresser? How did you even get into my apartment? When?” The puzzle clicks into place as I speak my thoughts out loud.
“Yesterday, while Hunter and I were shopping.” Glaring at Hunter, my nostrils flare.
“Is that why you took me? So Rory and Luke could break into my home and pry through my things?”
Hunter holds up his finger in warning. “Don’t do that. Don’t take what our time together meant and throw it out the window. They went to your apartment to pack your things, so you’d feel more comfortable here.”
My lips pinch together. Guilt gnaws at my chest, searching for a way to get in and douse my anger. I shouldn’t have accused him of using sex to manipulate me. But vulnerability is not what I want to feel right now.
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Rory’s expression is open.
My eyebrows knit together. “Why didn’t I tell you about something extremely private? You don’t have the right to every aspect of my life. Just because I live here, which I wasn’t given a choice in, doesn’t mean you get to control me.”
“We’re not trying to control you. We’re trying to protect you.” Luke takes a step forward, his hand outstretched, reaching for me.
I pull back, preventing him from flooding me with his calming touch. “This isn’t protection. This is suffocation.”
“Stop it, Savannah,” Hunter barks. “Just because we found a skeleton in your closet and we’re ready and willing to take care of it for you, doesn’t mean you need to hide from us.”
They are too observant, too perceptive. No one else in my life has figured out this much about me, so how did they manage it?
I open my arms out wide. “Does it look like I’m hiding?”
“You’re always hiding. The only way we learn anything about you is by hacking government websites and quite literally rummaging through your dresser.” Luke snatches the bag from Hunter and holds it up.
My hands fall to my hips as I bite back, “Which is something you never should have done in the first place.”
“We were packing a bag for you,” Luke argues.
“I don’t need you to do that for me! I’m perfectly capable of packing my own clothes.”
“We know that, Savannah,” Rory responds in a calming tone. “We were just trying to do something nice for you, the woman we care about.”
My chest pinches. He’s right, but I can’t tell them about the jewelry. I’ll fall apart. I’ll say too much.
Hunter steps closer, pushing past Rory and Luke. “If you’d have told us about this Shepherd guy, then maybe you wouldn’t have been attacked at the Mocha Lisa.”
My hands curl into fists on my hips. “Are you really blaming the victim right now?”
Hunter stands so close that our chests are almost touching. Only a wisp of air divides us. “You, Heartbreaker, are many things, but a victim is not one of them. You’re a fighter, a warrior…” His hand moves to my face, brushing aside a few strands of hair as he whispers, “an avenging angel.”
A chill seizes my entire body, and I rapidly shake my head in denial. My feet carry me backward. “I don’t—how do you—”
“Who do you think cleaned up after you on Friday?” Luke asks.
He couldn’t be talking about…
My forehead wrinkles. “The fire?”
Luke nods, and my mouth opens as I suck in a gasp.
They know.
My gaze looks into each of their faces, but I can’t comprehend what they’re thinking. My mind is flooded with too much.
Pivoting on my heel, I sprint up the stairs and take two steps at a time.
They won’t understand.
“Savannah!”
They won’t accept me.
“Wait!”
They’ll see me for what I truly am.
“We just want to talk!”
A psycho.
Crossing over the threshold into my room, I slam the door shut behind me and lock it. As soon as I step back, three resounding thuds bang into the door, and the knob jiggles.
“Savannah, open up!”
“Let us in!”
“Just unlock the door!”
A silent sob chokes me as tears streak down my face. I dart into my closet, shutting the door behind me, and crawl to the corner. Lying on my side, I curl into a ball and push away the pain.
No feeling in my hands and feet.
No feeling in my arms and legs.
No feeling in my heart.
All that’s left is my regret.
I never should have accepted the job from Hunter.
I never should have had coffee with Rory.
I never should have talked about books with Luke.
I thought I could keep them at arm’s length while basking in their warmth. Instead, they got too close and discovered everything.
Foolish dreams of a foolish girl.