Chapter 27 #2
"All right. You first or me first?" She thought briefly about the letter on the desk.
Maybe she should tell him about that. It might change things.
But... It didn't really change anything for her.
The more she thought about it, the more she knew exactly what she was going to do. No matter what Noah did or wanted.
"I guess I wouldn't have kissed you if I hadn't thought that you were the one.
I don't go around just kissing anyone. I don't necessarily agree with the way modern society just acts like that's an expected part of any relationship, no matter how brief.
I consider kissing an intimate thing that I only want to do with one person, and that's the woman who is, or is going to be, my wife.
So I wouldn't have kissed you if I didn't have strong enough feelings for you to think that we could possibly get married.
" He gave a little bit of a self-deprecating smile.
"I suppose I was afraid that I would scare you off if I told you that I wanted to marry you before I'd even kissed you.
But that's on me. I let fear keep me silent, instead of having this discussion a while ago. "
"All right," she said, a little uncertain. "So... You're saying you eventually want to get married?"
"To you. And 'eventually' sounds like sometime way far down the road.
I suppose... I would get married this evening if we could.
I'm not sure." He blew out a breath. "I've prayed about it a lot.
I've been asking God to bring the right woman in, and you've felt right since the moment we met. But again, I didn't want to scare you."
"I was in a precarious mental situation when you first met me, so I appreciate your consideration.
I also agree with you about kissing. It isn't something that I would do casually with just anyone.
I'm not interested in casual dating or relationships.
I never have been. I guess being an only child, I always thought I was a little bit too serious, and my friends teased me about it, but that's just the way I felt. "
"So we agree?" he asked, and there was a note of hope in his voice.
"Yes. I'm the same as you. I wasn't thinking that we would get married tonight, but I was definitely thinking that we were serious about each other.
I'm serious about you. And when you said that we would have children together someday, I assumed that that's what you meant too. That you were serious."
"All right. That's all I needed to hear. Actually, I feel like jumping up and running around the table a few times."
She laughed, but she thought he might've been serious about that, too.
"I actually do have something I wanted to share with you, but... I just got it today, and I didn't want you to think I was keeping anything from you."
"All right?" he said, his brows coming down, like he couldn't imagine what in the world.
"I got a job offer from a very prestigious music academy in the city.
It's a really good job offer, great pay, benefits, a prestigious teaching position, my students would be the very best of the best, but I'm going to turn it down.
Unless—" she paused for a moment. "Unless you wanted to move to the city and pursue your dreams of becoming a professional musician.
If that's the case, I will take this job, and you'll be set.
You can pursue your dreams and not worry about having to make money while you are doing it. "
His brows went up, and then at the last, they came back down.
"Wow. That's very generous of you."
"When we're married, my money is your money, and vice versa, I assume?"
"I suppose we hadn't talked about money, other than the fact that I don't have any. But yes. That would be the way I would want to do it too. Although while we're talking about things, I suppose I ought to put one more card on the table."
"You're holding cards?" she asked, surprised.
"Just one."
"Right," she said, waiting.
"I had an investor—a representative of Moondoe's Coffee—visit me.
Oh goodness, weeks ago. And he made me an offer.
It's a good offer. He wants to buy the building that my store is in, then he's going to demolish it and put in a Moondoe's Coffee shop.
It's a chain coffee store, no character, and—" he laughed a bit.
"All right. So I have a bias against it. Sorry."
"I was reading that. But go ahead. I can divorce your bias from your information and make my own determinations."
He grinned at her, and they shared a laugh.
"That's it. I pretty much was going to dismiss it out of hand.
Although our conversation about you having money and me not made me think about it.
Is that really that important to me? Am I embarrassed to be married to someone who makes more money than I do?
After all, I could sell the business, and I might not have more money than you—not that it's a competition—but I at least wouldn't be in poverty anymore. "
"What about your parents? What about your siblings?"
"I know my parents would tell me to sell the business if I wasn't making money at it anymore.
Or if I wanted to. I know they wouldn't want it to be a ball and chain around my neck.
I'm just not sure about my siblings... I don't know.
I was kind of surprised when they all called me and gave me a hard time.
I kind of thought they had forgotten they even had an older brother. "
"I'm sure they didn't forget. And I'm sure the older they get, the more they will appreciate the sacrifices that you made."
She believed that with all her heart.
"I don't know. I guess I don't really care whether they appreciate them or not. I didn't make them so that someone would appreciate it. I did it because it was the right thing to do."
"That's one of the things I admire about you.
And that's one of the reasons that I don't hesitate to say that I'm comfortable making our relationship as serious as it needs to be so soon.
Because you are a man who keeps your word and who takes your responsibilities seriously and who takes care of people.
I couldn't ask for more, other than that you love Jesus, and to me that underlines everything you do. "
He smiled, though her words pleased him.
"I don't know if anyone's ever given me a better compliment in my entire life."
"It was sincere, and every word was true."
His hand moved, and it covered hers where it sat on the table. Their fingers twined together, and they squeezed.
"I suppose because your siblings were harassing you, it means that I'm not getting kissed anymore."
"I think 'anymore' is a pretty strong word. I also don't think that I should allow my siblings to dictate my life."
"All right. I agree with both of those statements."
"But I do think that it might be a good idea for us to... Talk about how soon we want to get married. I feel like I'm pressuring you if I say that. Because... It really is kind of soon in our relationship."
"I guess sometimes we feel like our relationship needs to take the direction that everybody else's relationship does.
Society thinks if we do this, or if we do that, it's terrible, and we're too young, we're too old, it's too soon, we're engaged too long.
Like, let's just do it the way that we know God wants us to do it and not worry about what the rest of the world thinks. "
"I agree with that completely." He squeezed her hand. "So what do you think God wants us to do?"
"I told you. I'm comfortable with whatever you want, whatever you feel like God is leading us to. I'm comfortable going along with it."
She didn't want to be the one in charge. She didn't want to be the one calling the shots. She didn't think that was the way God wanted relationships to work, and she figured that it probably wouldn't be a very good way to start out their relationship.
"Christmas?" he suggested with a lifted brow.
"Well, Pastor Johnson might not want to work on Christmas."
"My best friend happens to be a pastor, and I'm pretty sure he'll marry us whenever we want him to. But I don't want you to rush into something. Is that enough time for you to be ready?"
"Plenty of time. Unless you wanted me to organize some kind of fancy extravagant thing."
"I just want you. Although... I guess none of my siblings are coming in. They might not get to go to my wedding."
"Maybe they'll decide that they're able to make it in for Christmas after all," she said with a twinkle in her eye.
He had to laugh at that.
"I guess it's enough to know that we're thinking about it within the next couple of months."
"Yeah. Or sooner. We could get married before Christmas."
"So you're gonna turn the job down?"
"If you're gonna turn your offer down."
"And you're gonna live with a struggling music store owner?"
"Who just so happens to be a Secret Saint to his town, the pianist at his church, and an upstanding and responsible guy with a great sense of humor. Yes."
"That was a real backwards marriage proposal. Maybe you deserve a better one."
"Maybe I just want one from the right person, and that would be you."
Maybe they had talked about not kissing, and she felt like they both meant it, but perhaps a conversation like this, where they were talking about getting married, needed to be punctuated with a kiss.
Regardless, he leaned forward, and so did she, and their lips touched, just lightly, and just for a second or two, before they both drew back, both of them grinning, remembering what his siblings had said and what they had said to each other.
"I'm falling in love with you," he said.
His words warmed her the whole way to her spine and back, and it was easy for her to reply. "I love you."