Epilogue
Gideon
(One month later…)
The faint scent of cedarwood smoke drifts from the fireplace, warming the living room of the main house. Outside, a crisp November wind rustles the bare branches of the oak trees, but inside, the farmhouse is alive with laughter.
It has been a month since Avery officially unpacked the last box from his truck. A month since the love of my life moved into my cozy little cottage.
Leaning against the frame of the arched entryway of the kitchen, I smile as I take in the room.
Ma’s house has always been large and full of life, especially with the numerous large Filipino parties we’ve hosted here, but tonight it feels different.
Fuller, somehow. Even though only a few of my blood relatives are here tonight, so are some of my closest friends.
Across the room, Ezra and Olly are sitting on the sofa, their heads pressed together as they whisper sweetly to each other.
Kennedy is by the dining table, wildly gesturing with a small plate of lumpia while Lena laughs so hard she nearly spills her drink.
Near the stove, Ma is in her element, dishing out second helpings of pancit to anyone who walks past while talking to her sister in Tagalog.
And right in the center of the living room, looking vibrant and sexy, is Avery.
My boyfriend.
Damn, when the hell is that word going to stop making me smile?
He’s wearing an oversized cream sweater that makes him look incredibly soft, and so fucking kissable.
His brown hair is styled in this faux bedhead way that drives me wild.
He’s laughing at something Olly just said, his brown eyes sparkling.
As if feeling my gaze, he tilts his head, locking his eyes onto mine across the crowded room.
He offers me a private, cute little wink that makes my heart flip.
I love him so damn much. Honestly, I never knew love could feel this way.
I shift my gaze toward the edge of the patio doors, looking for the one person who has been uncharacteristically quiet all evening.
Emery is standing alone just outside the glass doors, staring out into the darkness.
He’s holding an empty glass, his jaw tense.
His broad shoulders are hunched forward under his dark leather jacket.
As the lead singer of Arcade Lake and my closest friend, Emery is usually the center of the noise. But tonight, his mind is elsewhere.
I grab the chilled bottle of seasonal cranberry mead from the kitchen counter and make my way to the sliding glass door. The cool air hits my face, a sharp, crisp chill that feels nice.
"You're missing Ma's third round of adobo," I say.
Emery lets out a slow, heavy breath, turning his head to offer me a tired smile. "I think your mom will hunt me down if I eat another bite, Gid."
“Impossible.” I lift the bottle, pouring a generous splash of the golden mead into his empty glass. "Paxton just opened this batch yesterday. It's smooth."
"Thanks," Emery murmurs, taking a slow sip. He looks back out at the trees, his fingers tightly gripping the glass.
"What's going on, Em?" I ask. "You've been hovering off to the side all damn night. Olly said the band’s latest rehearsal was rough."
Emery’s jaw tightens. A deep, frustrated line forms between his eyebrows. He sets his glass down on the railing, rubbing a hand vigorously over his face. "Uh, rough is putting it lightly. The guys are barely speaking to me."
"Because of Roman?" I ask.
Emery flinches slightly at the name. Roman is his younger stepbrother, a brilliant musician who had been playing for Arcade Lake until Emery abruptly kicked him out, claiming Roman wasn't focused enough for a permanent position.
They needed to find someone to replace Olly after he retired, and everyone knew Roman was the best person for the job.
"I think I made a huge mistake, Gid," Emery confesses.
His voice drops to a raw, private whisper.
He stares down at his boots. His chip black nail polish catching in the light as he holds his glass.
"I told myself I was doing it for the good of the band.
I told the guys Roman was getting distracted, that he wasn't taking the music seriously. But the truth is...fuck. I don’t know what the truth is.
It just felt like the stage was getting too small for the both of us. "
I cock an eyebrow. "Meaning?"
"Meaning I couldn't breathe when he was up there next to me," Emery spits out. There’s a sudden, heavy wave of intense, complicated emotion flaring in his eyes.
He glances at me desperately. "Every time I looked over at him under the stage lights, my brain short-circuited.
I couldn't focus on the lyrics. I couldn't focus on the crowd.
I was so terrified of what I was starting to feel every time he touched my arm or looked at me after a set.
I panicked, Gid. I pushed him out before I could cross a line I can't uncross. And now the band hates me, Roman isn't taking my calls, and Mom says he’s hiding out at their place. I don’t know how to move forward. "
It hits me then. Looking at the fierce, agonizing torment on my best friend’s face, the reality is glaringly obvious. Emery has fallen for his stepbrother. The guilt and fear are eating him alive.
I reach out, my hand coming down heavily on Emery’s shoulder. I squeeze tightly, and blow out a breath. I know what it feels like to let fear control you. I know what it’s like to look at someone so beautiful and think you aren’t good enough.
"Listen to me, Em." I look him in the eye. "I tried to push Avery away because I thought I was too old, too rough, and too dark for his world. I made up a hundred different shitty reasons why we wouldn't work. And it was the biggest waste of time."
Emery looks up at me.
"If you made a mistake, then fix it," I tell him firmly.
"Stop hiding behind the band or some lame-ass excuse. Follow your heart, Emery. If you care about him—which it’s so fucking obvious you do—then ride down to his place, swallow your damn pride, and bring him back.
Don't let fear stop you from living your life. "
Emery studies me for a long, quiet moment. His shoulders slowly drop, and I see the moment the tension leaves his body. Something like determination flickers in his eyes. He opens his mouth to reply, but a noise makes us both turn.
Avery steps out of the house, holding two warm mugs of spiced cider. He smiles, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Hey. Your mom is about to start the karaoke machine, and Kennedy is already picking out an Arcade Lake track. I thought you guys might need a rescue."
“Oh crap,” I mumble. “Ma hates metal. She’s going to freak out.”
"I think that's my cue to head inside, stop Kennedy, and save your mom from my screaming vocals. She has already informed me multiple times that my band doesn’t actually perform music.
Something about it sounding like a cat in heat," Emery says. His tone seems lighter, and there’s an actual smile on his lips.
He shoots me a grateful look. "Thanks for the mead, Gid. And the advice."
"Anytime, Em," I reply.
We watch as Emery steps back inside. Avery walks up to me, handing me a mug of hot cider before leaning his back against the wooden railing. He glances up at me and tilts his head toward Emery’s retreating form.
Avery’s warm hand caresses my forearm. "Is he okay?" Avery asks. "That looked intense."
I hesitate for moment, wondering how much I can tell him. It dawns on me then, Avery is my person. I trust him with my life. If I ask him to keep this secret, he will. I wrap my large arm around Avery’s shoulders, pulling him flush against my side. I let out a low chuckle. “Can you keep a secret?”
Avery nods. “Of course. I won’t tell a soul. Not even Kennedy.”
"He’s figuring things out, I think our lead singer has officially fallen in love with his stepbrother."
Avery gasps. "Roman? Oh. Oh, wow. Well... that explains why the band group chat has been completely silent for a week. You guys were starting to talk nonstop. Then bam. Silence. Do you think he'll fix it?"
"If he's smart, he will." I turn my body so I’m facing Avery completely. I set my mug down on the railing, my large hands sliding down to rest against his waist.
The cold wind blows around us, as I look down into Avery’s pretty brown eyes.
I can’t believe I have someone this sweet and caring in my life.
"Let Emery try to figure things out. Something tells me I lit a fire under his feet and he’s going to chase his heart," I murmur, pulling him tighter against me.
I reach over, my thick thumb lightly tracing his jaw.
"For now, I would rather focus on my beautiful boyfriend. "
“I like the sound of that.” Avery grins, leaning up on his toes to kiss my lips. "I love you, Honey Bear. More than anything."
"I love you too, Avery," I whisper, leaning down and reclaiming his mouth in a deep, sensual kiss. "Forever."