THIRTEEN #2
“You’re not spanking either of us,” he clarified, and I dropped my shoulders, the smile falling from my face. Bummer.
“Then I’m not a Sadist,” I mindlessly said, but right as I was about to tick no, he spoke.
“It’s more than that. There are a lot of aspects to being a Sadist.”
I lowered my voice, a mischievous grin dancing on my lips. “Will you show me?” I asked, kicking my feet in the air, and there was a brief pause on his end.
“Do you have any other questions, Dakota?” he brushed off my question, and I could tell I hit a nerve.
“Yes, now will you show me?” I asked again. “I really want you to show me, Logan.”
“It doesn’t work like that.”
“Then maybe Chase will. Or Kaden. He looks like he’ll put me in so much pain that I’ll have a couple of orgasms,” I blurted out.
“Dakota,” he warned, and I broke out in a smile.
“Kidding. Kind of— but next question,” I said, sitting up and crossing my legs. “What’s…” I trailed off. “Katop—“ I cut myself off in uncertainty. “Katoptro…?”
I could hear the smile in his tone. “Katoptronophilia?”
“Yes that,” I blurted out, relieved he knew what I was talking about.
“That’s being aroused by watching yourself, or others through a mirror while they engage in any sexual acts.” Oh?
“Thank you,” I ticked yes. “Next question. What does my safe word have to be?”
“You have to choose one yourself.”
“Do I need one or three?”
“Preferably one.”
I nodded, trailing my eyes down the page. “Does the safe word count for punishments?”
“No, they don’t. As the Dom, we’re aware of your limits. We’re not punishing you to hurt you, but to correct your behavior. But, the punishments will be discussed with you.”
I swallowed hard, feeling my heartbeat accelerate. My palms turned clammy around the pen so I dropped it, rubbing my hand on my thigh.
“I noticed that there was a page for each of you as well,” I cleared my throat. “Can you explain that to me, please?”
“That simply states the role each of us plays, the rules we have, and our interests.”
I tried my luck. “Are they set in stone?”
“Yes. They’re non-negotiable.”
I chewed my bottom lip, confused on whether or not I liked that.
“Cool,” I breathed, gathering both contracts. I dropped my laptop on my lap, opening Google. “Thank you, but I need to go. I’ll see you later,” I rushed through my words before ending the call.
I stared at the search bar, hearing Chase’s words repeat in my head. An unsettling feeling stirred in my stomach as I started typing. We’ll start with the overall view of BDSM. That won’t be too bad.
* * *
“I can’t. I can’t do it!” I exclaimed, shoving the paperwork into Chase’s chest as he opened the front door.
I walked into their living room, dropping my bag on the couch. “I’ll basically be a slave to three men. I can’t,” I frantically blurted out, catching Logan and Kaden’s attention.
They were both seated on the couch in front of me, except Kaden was typing away on his laptop.
“That was an option. If you didn’t tick yes, you won’t be our slave,” Chase calmly stated, entering behind me as I paced up and down. I snapped my head toward him in shock. “That was a joke. We aren’t looking for a slave.”
“But, of course, I’ll still be a slave to you,” I nodded, meeting their gazes. “I took your advice. I went on Google,” I said to Chase, and his jaw tightened.
“That’s not what I said.”
“Same thing. But you’re supposed to tell me what to wear, how to talk, when to fucking talk, what to eat, what to drink—do I look like someone who’s fucking impaired to you?” I asked, resting both of my hands on my hips.
“Language,” Kaden warned and I bit my tongue.
“Don’t even get me started on the positions,” I hugged my stomach, nausea stirring in my core. “The stretching—bruises, Chase. There were so many fucking bruises,” I shuddered.
“Breathe,” his heavy gaze pinned me to my spot, and I swallowed hard. “Wardrobe training ensures that you’re appropriately dressed in public. And as you have just displayed, you have a very foul mouth, Dakota,” Chase used his little formal tone that made my knees involuntarily weak.
I crossed my arms over my chest, listening intently as he walked towards me.
“We control your diet to ensure you’re staying healthy and as for drinking, we expect you to drink a lot of water,” he stopped in front of me. “Alcohol will only be allowed on special occasions.”
“And why can’t I do those things on my own?”
“Because we’re responsible for you.”
I took a step back, scanning his appearance before taking in Logan and Kaden’s as well.
“Do you even know anything about women’s fashion?” I asked, looking between the three of them.
“That is your only concern?” Logan asked, and I nodded.
“Yeah. I have a reputation to uphold.”
“You heard the appropriate part, right?” Logan questioned. “As long as you’re dressed appropriately we won’t have you change clothes.”
“Fine,” I nodded in agreement, chewing the inside of my cheek.
“And as for the images you saw,” Chase drew my attention back to him. “BDSM can get extreme. But I can assure you, Dakota, we won’t do anything you aren’t consenting to.”
Those words extinguished the uncontrollable fire burning inside of me, and I nodded with a sharp exhale.
“Good. That’s… good,” I swallowed the nervousness down my throat. “You promise?” I looked up at Chase.
He seemed amused. “Yes, Dakota, I promise.”
An anticipated silence fell over the room.
“Well, it seems as though chivalry has died,” I murmured, casually glancing around the room. “No one has offered me anything to drink yet.”
I watched an amused grin grow on Logan’s face and unintentionally, I smiled too.
He left and soon returned with a glass of water for me. He asked me to join them for dinner tonight and of course I accepted his invitation. After finishing my water I handed him the glass.
“Let’s dissect this agreement,” I sighed, plopping down on the couch.
Crossing my legs I grabbed the contract, opening to the first page. “Come on, gather around,” I motioned the contract in a circle.
Chase cast Logan a smug look and Kaden groaned, mumbling something in Italian under his breath.
Both Chase and Kaden sat down on the couch in front of me while Logan stood to my right, arms crossed over his chest.
“First order of business,” I cleared my throat.
“I ticked yes for…” I trailed off. “Begging, biting, blindfolding, cheirophilia,” I stopped then glanced at Logan and with a sly grin, his tongue swiped across his bottom lip.
“Degradation… although,” I shifted in my seat.
“When it comes to that last one I don’t want you to call me bad things in public because it would hurt my feelings.
But in the bedroom when we, you know, then it’s okay. ”
“We need to work on her communication skills,” Chase pointed out, his voice laced with confusion, and Kaden nodded almost automatically.
“I can communicate,” I protested, feeling slightly offended.
“We need you to communicate in full sentences. You need to be comfortable with saying certain terms or it could lead to miscommunication,” Chase explained.
Logan sat down next to me, taking my chin in his hands. “You need to be able to tell us that you want us to degrade you in the bedroom during sex, but to be mindful when we’re in public.”
Swallowing hard I crossed my legs to soothe the sudden pulsing.
“As I was saying,” I cleared my throat. I continued listing the rest then lifted my eyes to them.
“My maybe’s—” I cut myself off with an unsure sigh.
“Anal sex?” I reluctantly said, feeling foolish about even being uncertain about that one.
Well, Einstein, you wanted three men to fuck you into oblivion at the same time.
How could you possibly only offer up two holes?
I hadn’t experienced anal sex yet, and with how big the guys felt with clothes, I could only imagine how painful it would be.
Because of my pure embarrassment, Kaden let out a brief huff of amusement and I awkwardly shifted in place, dropping my eyes back down to the contract.
“That’s okay, Dakota,” Chase reassured me. “That’ll take time.”
I nodded in understanding, appreciative of his gentle tone, so I continued.
“You signed it?” Logan asked, taking the contract from me and I nodded in confirmation. He paged through, skimming through everything and I noticed Kaden sitting back in his chair.
Whenever he looked at me it felt as though I was being examined under a microscope.
His hard stare had the hairs on my skin rising.
“I have a question.” I watched the slightest interest spark in his eyes before it was masked and hidden away. “So, are you guys like… you know,” I asked, looking between the three of them with a mischievous smile.
“Big girl words, Dakota,” Logan reminded me as he took his sweatshirt off. I caught a glimpse of his lower torso as his shirt rode up and my thighs subconsciously squeezed together.
“Is your relationship platonic or do you do to each other what you do to me?” I asked, feeling that was the best possible way I was going to get my point across.
“No. We don’t have any sexual attraction to each other. You’re our main focus.”
“Right,” I slowly nodded. “I mean I’m just asking. No judgment here,” I mumbled under my breath and Kaden rubbed his tongue on the inside of his cheek. He does not like me.
I looked away from him, darting my eyes to the beautifully lit fireplace. It was warm and soothing, like a furry blanket and a hot cup of cocoa in the heart of winter.