CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE #2
His free hand found my clit, rubbing in quick circles as he increased his pace. The combination of sensations pushed me higher and higher until I was getting closer and closer to reaching my peak.
"That's it," he encouraged. "Let go for me. Come on this dick, beautiful. Let me feel that pussy squeeze me."
My orgasm crashed over me like a wave, my body shaking with the force of it. I screamed his name as pleasure erupted through me again, clenching around him as he continued to thrust inside me.
"Fuck," he groaned, watching me shiver beneath him. "You're so beautiful when you come."
As I came down from my high, I could feel him getting closer. His pace increased, his breath was more ragged, and he was killing my damn stomach, but I took all of it.
"Where do you want it?" he asked.
"Inside me," I replied without hesitation. "I want to feel you."
He thrust deep one last time, burying himself to the hilt as he came with a groan. I could feel him pulsing inside me, the warmth spreading through my core as he filled me.
For a moment we stayed like that, connected, the rain continuing to pour down around us. Then he stood there with his hands on top of his head.
"You're going to be the death of me."
"No. You gone be the death of me if you rupture my damn kidneys," I giggled.
I sat up and pushed my wet hair from my face.
“My hair is a mess thanks to you,” I teased.
"Told you I'd get your hair done."
“That you are.”
“Come on. Let’s get inside before we get sick.”
By the time we finally left the rooftop, rain was pouring. I couldn't stop laughing as Jokah grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the elevator.
"We are soaking wet."
"No shit."
"And whose fault is that?"
"Yours."
I looked at him. "Mine?"
"You wanted to stay."
"You wasn't exactly rushing to leave."
"I’m complaining either."
The elevator doors opened and we stepped inside, dripping water everywhere. I looked down at the puddle forming beneath us.
"They're gonna know exactly what we were doing."
Jokah pressed the button for the penthouse.
"And?"
I stared at him.
"You have no shame."
"None."
I laughed and leaned against him. Neither did I apparently.
Once we got inside, we went straight to the shower.
By the time we finished and climbed into bed, I was exhausted.
I slipped underneath the covers while Jokah turned off the lamp and got in beside me.
He pulled me against him, and I rested my head on his chest. His fingers moved lazily up and down my back.
We just lay in silence. Today had been a lot.
Daddy was finally going to rehab, Jokah had looked me in my eyes and told me he loved me, and then there was everything that happened between us tonight.
My emotions had been all over the place, but for the first time in a while, none of it felt heavy. I lifted my head.
"You know today might've been one of my favorite days with you."
"Even with your daddy?"
"Especially because of Daddy."
He looked down at me.
"I feel like something finally went right."
"It did," he agreed.
I smiled and laid my head back down.
A few minutes passed before something crossed my mind. "Where did you go the other day?"
His hand stopped for half a second before continuing down my back. "What day?"
"When Armani and Chanel came over."
"My ex's son had a football game."
I lifted my head. "Your ex's son?"
"Yeah. Cody."
I frowned. "You still go to his games?"
"When I can."
"Why?"
Jokah looked at me. "Me and Shania were together for a minute. And during that time, me and lil' man got close. Just because me and his mama ain't together no more don't mean I'ma disappear on him."
That made sense, but something about it still bothered me. "How old is he?"
"Eleven."
"And you went by yourself?"
"Yeah."
"Was Shania there?"
He looked at me. "Of course. That's his mama."
I stared at him in silence. Normally, the way he said it would've made me laugh. This time, it didn't.
"You knew you were going?"
"Yeah."
"And you didn't think to mention it?"
"I promised him I'd be there before me, and Shania stopped fucking with each other. I wasn't breaking my word to him because I don’t fuck with his mama."
I couldn't argue with that. Actually, I respected it, but damn, he could’ve given me a heads up first. Cody hadn't done anything.
"Okay."
Jokah watched me.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"That ain't nothing."
"I just didn't know."
"You know now."
I laid back down, but something about the conversation didn't feel finished.
"Did you see Shania?"
"Yeah."
I looked at him again.
"At the game?"
"At the game and when I took Cody home."
"You took him home too?"
"He wanted a game for his PS5 after they won. I took him to get it, grabbed him something to eat and then dropped him off. And no, she didn’t go with us. I wouldn’t disrespect you like that."
"Oh."
There was more. I could feel it because Jokah got quiet as fuck, so I sat up.
"What?"
He looked at me.
"What?"
"Why you looking like that?"
"Like what?"
"Jokah."
He exhaled and sat up against the headboard.
"I gotta tell you something."
My stomach immediately tightened.
"What?"
"Shania told me she is pregnant."
Everything in me went still.
"What?"
"She came outside when I dropped Cody off and showed me a pregnancy test."
I stared at him.
"A positive pregnancy test?"
"Yeah."
My heart started beating harder.
"And she's saying it's yours?"
"Yeah."
I pulled the covers higher over my chest. For a few seconds, I couldn't think of anything to say.
"You believe her?"
"No."
His answer came immediately.
"Why not?"
"Because I know Shania."
"That doesn't mean she's lying."
"I ain't say it did."
"Then what are you saying?"
"I'm saying I don't believe her."
"Did you sleep with her?"
"Before you, yeah."
"How long before me?"
Jokah went quiet. And that silence told me more than I wanted it to.
"Jokah."
"Close enough."
My stomach dropped.
"Close enough for what?"
"For the timing to make sense."
I moved away from him.
"So, she could actually be pregnant with your baby."
"Could be. But like I said I don't believe she is."
"Those are two completely different things."
"I know."
"Do you?"
His eyebrows pulled together. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means you keep telling me you don't believe her like that's supposed to make the possibility disappear."
"I ain't say that."
"But that's how you're talking."
"Kaior—"
"No. Because you went to her son's game, took him shopping, took him to eat, went back to her house, and then she walked outside and told you she was pregnant."
"I went there to drop Cody off."
"I know that."
"Then don't make it sound like I went over there fucking with Shania."
"I didn't!"
My voice came out louder than I intended. The room went quiet. Jokah stared at me. I took a deep breath and changed my tone.
"I'm not accusing you of cheating on me."
"Then what are you accusing me of?"
"I'm not accusing you of anything. I'm trying to process all this shit you just dropped on me."
He looked away for a second.
"And you knew?"
"Knew what?"
"About the pregnancy."
"Since she showed me the test."
"Which was when?"
"The day of Cody's game."
I stared at him.
"And you're just telling me?"
"I ain't know how to tell you."
"You seemed to figure it out just fine."
"Kaior."
"What?"
"I wasn't hiding shit from you."
"I didn't say you were!"
I rubbed my forehead.
"That's what you're not understanding. I'm not mad that you went to Cody's game. Honestly, I think it says a lot about you that you kept your promise to him even though you and his mother aren't together anymore."
"Then what's the problem?"
"The problem is I didn't know any of it."
When he gritted his teeth, I knew he was getting upset. "I don't tell you every fucking place I go."
"I'm not asking you to!"
I moved farther away from him.
"This isn't about knowing where you are every second. I don't care about that. But your ex-girlfriend possibly carrying your child is something I should've known the day you found out."
"I was gonna tell you."
"When?"
He didn't answer fast enough. I laughed, but nothing about this shit was funny.
"Exactly."
"Don't do that."
"Do what?"
"Turn this into some shit it ain't."
"Then tell me what it is, Joaquin."
He looked at me and I waited for an answer that I wasn’t even sure I wanted. For the first time since we'd been together, the silence between us didn't feel comfortable. It felt heavy.
"What happens if it's yours?" I finally asked.
"I don't know."
That was probably the most truthful answer he'd given me since this conversation started.
My eyes burned, but I was trying to stay calm.
Because suddenly this wasn't about Shania, Cody or his football game.
This was about the possibility of there being a baby.
His baby. And no matter how much Jokah loved me, that would change everything. I turned away from him and laid down.
"Kaior."
"I need a minute."
"Baby—"
"Please Joaquin. I need a minute to think."
He didn’t say another word.
A few seconds later, the mattress shifted behind me, but he didn't touch me. That hurt too, because normally he would've pulled me against him. Tonight, he let me have the space I asked for. I stared into the darkness thinking about what all of this meant for us.
Less than twenty-four hours ago, I listened to this man tell me he'd fallen in love with me. Now I was lying beside him wondering if another woman was carrying his child. For the first time since Jokah came into my life, I didn't know what came next.