Chapter 13 #2
Once he made it to the kitchen, Sienna had Gunna & Chris Brown’s WGFT (Remix) oozing through her phone, shifting the atmosphere to one that was conducive to ease.
He stood and watched as Sienna danced while fixing two bowls of Blue Bell’s Cookies & Cream ice cream.
Monroe chuckled lowly, watching her dance with both hands in the air, seductively swaying her hips and popping her ass, riding the beat like she always had.
Damn, she still dance when she comes in the kitchen, Monroe thought his mind going back to the time he used to come home to this exact scene.
The only difference is that it always ended with him being knee deep in her pussy.
“Oh my God,” Sienna laughed. “I didn’t even hear you come in here.”
“Mhm,” Monroe said, accepting the bowl of ice cream she’d made for him.
Sienna walked back to the kitchen island and grabbed her bowl, then pulled out a chair and sat to the right of him.
“I know a lot of things took place in my absence. A lot of things I have no control over, but can I get an update?” Sienna asked, taking a small scoop of ice cream into her mouth.
Monroe swallowed the ice cream that had already melted in his mouth. “A whole lotta shit happened to be honest,” he said, leaning back in his chair.
“Can I at least get the condensed version?” Sienna pressed. “Let me live vicariously through your memories. I mean this was supposed to be my life, but your mom ruined all of that for us,” Sienna said, putting her head down, doing her best to hide the sadness in her gaze.
Monroe caught it, but didn’t speak on it.
“Losin’ you turned a nigga into an untamed savage.
Nigga lost touch wit’ reality for a minute,” he told her honestly.
“When I shook back, I took over The Black Family Empire, New York, and became the Don you lookin’ at right now.
I done touched more money, and accomplished more than most men ever will in a lifetime. ”
“I can see that much,” Sienna said. “But, I have to ask… Has all the things you’ve accomplished brought you happiness and contentment?”
Monroe thought over her question before responding.
“I thought it would at one point in my life, but nah,” he told her truthfully.
“I surpassed every goal I set for myself, and helped the people close to me obtain a level of wealth they never would’ve obtained without my help.
I’m proud as hell of the good shit I’ve done for myself and the people around me, but at the end of it all I was still empty until–”
“Until you met this other woman?” Sienna cut in?
Monroe took the last bit of his ice cream. “Her name is Promise,” Monroe informed her, then got up to grab the bottle of Hennessy he kept in the kitchen when he didn’t feel like going to his in-home bar. “You wanna drink?” He offered, while pouring himself a double shot.
“Yes,” she agreed, knowing she’d need it.
Monroe poured Sienna’s drink next, then brought it to her.
“How long have you been with Promise?” Sienna asked, trying to measure the depth of his feelings by the length of time he’d been with her.
“Almost three years,” he revealed.
“Were you in any other relationships before her?” Sienna pressed further.
Monroe looked at Sienna and took a long swig from his glass, then refilled it.
He knew why she was asking him all these questions, but he wondered if she was emotionally in a place to receive his unfiltered truth.
He knew how sensitive Sienna's heart was when it came to him, and that’s why he always handled her with gentleness.
He wondered in what ways she’d changed, and had it been for the best or worst. Either way, he didn’t have it in him to be deceitful.
“It took a nigga nine years to get over losing you, Sienna. I can’t even explain how bad that shit fucked me up.
After you, I stopped believin’ real love existed, ‘cause if it did, I ain’t think a nigga would get that shit twice in a lifetime,” Monroe said, taking another swig.
“A part of me died when I buried you. And let me be clear when I tell you, I ain’t see no light no time soon after that. ”
Sienna drank the Henny Monroe had poured for her, and welcomed the smooth burn, then took it upon herself to pour another shot.
Listening to Monroe tell the story from his perspective took Sienna back to the hardest time in her life, and coming to the realization that they had both been stuck…
they had both grieved their relationship was hitting different.
Monroe smirked.
“Please continue,” Sienna stated, fighting back her tears, and giving him her full attention.
“Shit, life went on,” Monroe shrugged. “Emotionally dead. Mentally scarred. Physically mute for a period of time…But life kept on movin’ ‘til a nigga caught up, and learned how to do some shit I ain’t ever see myself having to do.”
“What’s that?” Sienna pried, needing to know.
“Move on with my life without you,” Monroe told her, boring deep into her soul with tear-stained eyes.
“When I met Promise, she resuscitated my soul. She cleansed the lens I saw life through, and helped me understand shit I ain’t even know could exist between a man and woman.
When I’m with her, I breathe different,” he confessed, hoping she’d understand.
Sienna swiped away the obstinate tear that fell from her eye. She tried to hold it back, but the way Monroe spoke about Promise ate away at the hope she’d held on to for all these years.
“You love her,” Sienna stated, still digesting the revelation herself.
Monroe didn’t answer her because he didn’t have to, and he didn’t see a need to smear it in.
However, there was another truth that surfaced in that moment for him–he still cared about Sienna.
His chest had tightened when he saw her cry.
He stood and gathered the dishes they'd used for ice cream and placed them in the dishwasher, then walked back to the table.
“Come here,” he said, unable to fight the remorse that had built in his chest.
Sienna obeyed, standing, then walked straight into his embrace.
They shared the type of hug that was powerful enough to bring them both to their knees.
It was the type of hug that Monroe should have given her when he saw her again, but didn’t have the capacity to when he saw her again for the first time.
The type of hug that held so many emotions, had so much weight, but left them no room to run away…
They had to stand in the truth that the moment offered, but somehow it didn’t feel right.
For one suspended moment, it was just Monroe and Sienna…
two souls trying to find the pieces Macie had stolen from them.
"Tell me I wasn't the only one who never stopped feeling this,” Sienna stated, closing the small space between them. “Do you still love me?” Sienna asked as tears she no longer fought to hide cascaded down her face.
Monroe didn’t speak.
Sienna reached up and smoothed her hand along his strong jawline, relaxing the tension she could visibly see through the flexing of his temples.
Gravity organically drew their lips to each other, and the instant their lips touched, human reasoning evaded them.
Their tongues danced naturally as they moved off of pure muscle and emotional memory.
It was funny how love moved people in the most inopportune times in life sometimes.
Love didn’t always abide by the rules people set.
Sometimes love was reckless, and it got messy.
Sometimes everyone won, or someone took a loss, but there was never a time where there wasn’t a lesson to be learned.
Sienna’s hands traveled from Monroe’s face to his chest, desperately searching for his heartbeat.
Beyond the threats on her life, and Monroe’s confession of love for Promise, Sienna needed to make him remember their love.
She needed him to realize what they had was still worth fighting for.
She yearned to make love to him because she understood his love language.
He wasn’t like most men, he didn’t just have casual sex with multiple women at a time.
He connected not only emotionally, but on a heart, soul, and spiritual level.
This was the only way she knew how to touch him, and more than anything in the world, she needed him to feel her.
Their kiss deepened, and Sienna’s hands moved from his chest down to the rim of his pants, and that’s when she felt his heart race.
“Nah, we can’t take it there,” Monroe said, gently covering her hands with his. “You deserve more than a moment from me," he told her, resting his forehead against hers.
Sienna’s body shivered because she was wide open, and the lash of his rejection felt like hot coals on her heart.
“Don’t push me away,” she whispered, grasping for a piece of hope to cling to. “I just want to shower you with my love.”
Monroe sighed deeply, then put some space between them. Not because he didn’t feel anything, he needed some space because he felt everything. Thoughts of Promise and Sienna combined were too overwhelming, and he was way too strategic to make permanent decisions in the heat of the moment.
“Good night, Sienna,” Monroe said, then walked out of the kitchen.
Sienna didn’t move…couldn’t move when the room spun around her at such a rapid pace.
Early The Next Morning…