Chapter 12 Ella #2
My stomach flip flops, remembering the cameras in the room.
“Do you want to see, Mr. Langford?”
I can hear the quiet motorized sound of the partition closing in his car.
“Show me everything.”
“Oh god. I don’t even want to know what you just got up to in that room,” Lucy hisses twenty minutes later when I walk out into the living room. I’m back in Asher’s T-shirt, and my hair is probably a disheveled mess. My cheeks are definitely flushed.
Zahra shoots me a disturbed look.
“Like you two have any room to talk,” I say, smoothing my hair. I look at Zahra. “I’ve heard you and Alec fuck more times than I can count. Back in undergrad and again when I lived with you. You two are like bunnies.”
Zahra bursts out laughing. “Let’s hope we don’t replicate like them. At least not for a few more years.”
“And you leave a string of broken-hearted men wherever you go,” I say to Lucy. “I swear you could have men agreeing to sell their souls to Satan himself for a second date and a second fuck with you. But no. You tap them, and then you ghost them.”
Lucy smirks. “It’s not my fault if they’re not interesting enough for a second date.”
“So, let’s not get all judgy about our sex drives. The four of us have always been horny bitches.” Maya, my sister, is no exception to our friend group in this regard.
“Well, now that you’re satiated, shall we go shooting?” Lucy asks.
“It couldn’t hurt to get out of here for a bit,” Zahra agrees. “But we don’t have to go shooting guns.” She shudders again.
“Nonsense. Ella needs to learn how to shoot. No time like the present.”
I weigh it over in my mind. “That actually sounds good. I’m intimidated by the fact that I’ve never even touched a gun, and I’ll probably have some master marksman teaching me if I go with the security team. I’m already embarrassed, and I haven’t even started training.”
“Good. There’s an indoor range not too far from here.”
Zahra groans.
“Bend your elbows a bit,” Lucy yells, and I can barely hear her through the massive noise-blocking headphones I’m wearing.
She stands behind me and is trying to help me with my hold.
It’s not going well, and I’m literally sweating from nerves.
I can’t help but picture this same type of gun held in Kyle’s hand, aimed at me.
The fear I felt in that moment reemerges, curdling in my gut.
“I don’t know if I can do this.”
“This is important.”
“I . . . the last time I saw a gun was when Kyle attacked me. He threatened me with it, and then the thing went off in his hands when I tased him. I wasn’t hit, but I’ll never forget that sound or that fear.”
Lucy gently pries the handgun away from my sweaty palms.
“Take a breath. There’s no rush. We’ll go at your pace, okay?”
I nod, swallowing hard. I’ve put Kyle and his bullshit behind me, but sometimes I still flash back to the moment he pulled the gun on me. I still struggle to understand how someone I loved could do such a thing, no matter how desperate they were.
But I also never want to feel helpless again like I had in that moment.
I do as Lucy says and let out a long breath. “Okay. Show me what to do.”
Lucy comes to stand behind me again and helps me with my grip. She adjusts the gun in my hands and lightly tugs on my arms to unlock my stiffened elbows.
“If your elbows are locked, you won’t be able to absorb the kick back effectively.”
“What’s a kick back?”
“It’s the reaction the gun will have when it fires. You can’t expect a gun to stay still when it’s launching a bullet out of its barrel.”
“It moves?” I say with a gasp. “But it doesn’t move in the movies.”
Lucy snorts. “That’s the movies, babe, this is real life. Just brace your arms a bit. You’re shooting a small handgun, not a shotgun, you’ll be fine.”
I swallow hard, questioning my sanity for coming here, wondering if I should stop while I’m ahead and go sit with Zahra, who refused to participate and chose to watch us through the windows above the range.
“Just watch again,” Lucy says, and I slowly let go of the gun as she takes it in her hand. She lifts it and holds it like a pro.
Bang, bang, bang.
Three holes appear through the target. Three holes straight through the head of the outlined body.
“Holy shit. How did you do that?”
“I got my first gun when I was eight.”
“What?”
She shrugs. “It was a BB gun. But I’ve had tactical training since I was twelve. My father may be a backwards misogynistic bastard, but he always wanted me to be able to protect myself.”
Damn.
Lucy stands behind me and again helps me to grip the gun.
I try paying attention to her words as she explains how to aim, but I’m so nervous that I miss half of it.
I finally pull the trigger, but in glorious fashion, I scream when the gun fires, jump in shock when it kicks back, and nearly drop it.
“For the love of god,” Lucy snarls, prying the gun out of my hands. “You waved that gun in ten different directions after you fired it. That is the opposite of gun safety, Ella.”
“I hate this,” I say, shuddering. “I don’t think I want to learn how to use a gun.”
Lucy shoots me a pitying look and pats my shoulder. “You fired one shot. Try again.”
I raise the gun, determined to push through my discomfort.
I flinch and cry out again as I pull the trigger.
Thirty minutes later, I’m barely able to point and shoot without startling and screaming.
It’s progress, I guess. But I never even hit the target once.
Normally, I’m someone who can push past being uncomfortable, but with this, I just can’t.
“Well, congratulations, Ells, we’ve found something else you’re terrible at. You can’t cook or shoot for shit,” Lucy teases, trying to lighten the mood as we exit the range.
I chuckle, not remotely offended. My friends teased me for years that I was a jane-of-all-trades type of girl.
Not necessarily an expert at anything, but pretty good at lots of things.
They used to take bets when I would try new things to see if I would be okay at whatever it was or if I would be terrible at it. And more often than not, I was decent.
Too bad my friends didn’t take bets on my shooting skills.
Lucy exchanges a knowing look with Jenkins, who oversaw the entire thing, as we meet up with Zahra in the waiting area.
“Keep your training up, Jenkins,” Lucy says to him. “Because this one might just be hopeless when it comes to firearms.”
Jenkins fights back a smile.
“This is not for me,” I grumble, still shuddering at the memory of the gun in my hands. I turn and look at my trusty bodyguard. “Don’t delude yourself into thinking I’ll be able to protect myself with a gun, Jenkins. You’re really stuck with me now.”
“It’s all good, Ms. Hale. I’ll handle the weaponry.
You just learn some basic self-defense and don’t ever evade your security detail again.
” He gives me a stern look, and I flush with more embarrassment.
So yeah, I wouldn’t have gotten into that trouble with Kyle if I hadn’t skirted my security.
“We’re here to protect you, and we will. ”
“Who’s going to tell Asher how bad I am at this?” I muse. “Should I?”
Jenkins winces slightly. “That might be best. But I’ll back you up.”
“You mean you’ll tell him I’m the worst shot you’ve ever seen.”
“And that you scream like a little girl every time the gun fires,” he says with a wink.
I bury my face in my hands. “At least it was only the two of you who saw it,” I say, my voice muffled.
“Oh, I saw it too through the window,” Zahra snickers, joining us as we make our way out of the building. “Girl, I don’t even know what to say.”
I let out a chagrined laugh. “I don’t think there’s anything to say. I tried. I failed. And now we pray I never need to use a gun.”