Chapter 33 Wonderland
ARIZONA
“Iloved you then. I love you now. And I always will.”
Carter’s words were currently running through my mind, and every memory I’d ever shared with him was coming into focus.
From the time he pushed me off the swings when I was mid-air in fourth grade, to all the times he’d come to my room and spent the night as I cried over another breakup or disaster date in college.
As I lay on top of him—my hands entwined with his after hours of lengthy, make-up sex, I wondered how I was ever going to leave.
There had to be some exception about returning to school late with no penalty, some special clause about having your best friend tell you he loves you and being allowed to take some extra time off.
Even if there wasn’t, I was tempted to call the dean of academics and ask if I could be the first.
“Are you okay?” Carter brushed a strand of hair out of my face.
I nodded.
“Why are you so quiet, then? What are you thinking about?”
“France.”
Smiling, he looked directly into my eyes. “You’re going back to school on time, Ari. And as much as I’d like for you to, I won’t let you stay this time either.”
“What makes you think I was thinking about staying?” I asked. “I was actually just thinking about how I can’t wait to get back.”
“In that case, I can take you to the airport right now.” His lips curved into a smirk, and I rolled my eyes—unable to keep up that charade.
“I only have three and a half days left here,” I said softly. “I feel like I wasted most of my time being mad at you.”
“No, you wasted it being with Sean.”
“Do you think he’ll ever talk to me again?”
“Do you think I’m going to talk about him again?” He gave me a blank stare. “In my bed of all places?”
“Right. I wouldn’t talk to me either.”
“He’ll get over it.” He rolled me off him and pulled me against his side. “Tell me all the things I’ve missed.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean,” he said, running his fingers through my hair. “Outside of school, I have no idea what you’ve been doing all these months. Tell me everything.”
“You want me to give you a play by play about what I do every day?”
“Eventually, but I’d rather start with something simple, like what made you cut your hair.”
“Do you not like it?”
“I fucking love it.” He ran his fingers through it again. “I’m just curious. You’ve worn it the same way since freshman year.”
“I never thought you actually paid attention to my hair.”
“I didn’t.” He smiled.
“Well, my roommate suggested it. She said getting a new look would help me start anew after some guy really hurt my feelings. She said a new haircut and style was the first step in forgetting all about him.”
“Did it work?”
“Absolutely. I haven’t thought about him since.”
We both laughed and he sat up, slowly pulling me with him.
“Since we only have three and a half days left,” he said, “how do you want to spend them?”
“Right here is just fine.”
He raised his eyebrow. “Are you insinuating more sex?”
“No.” I blushed. “But if I was, I don’t think that’d be a huge problem. Would it?”
“No, but…” His voice trailed off, and he stood up and walked over to his dresser.
He picked up his phone and tapped the screen a few times—mumbling words I didn’t understand. When he was done talking to himself, he put on a pair of jeans.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” His eyes finally met mine.
“I’m confused. I just told you that I wanted to stay in bed and—”
“Have sex?” He smirked.
“Yes, and I’m pretty sure putting on more clothes doesn’t necessarily help with that activity.”
“It doesn’t,” he said, stepping over to me. “But since I can personally guarantee that we’ll be spending your final twenty four hours here doing that, I was thinking we could try something else for the other two and a half days.”
“Something else like what?”
He bent down and trailed his fingers against my lips. “Like one of those ‘whirlwind dates’ from high school, except we’ll both be with the right person this time. Do you think that type of thing is still popular?”
“Yes.” My heart fluttered against my chest. “Yes, I think it definitely is.”
“Do you mind if we bypass the movie theater part, though?” he asked. “I don’t recall that part going that well for you before.”
I laughed and grabbed a pillow—tempted to hit him over the head with it, but he grabbed it and tossed it across the room.
“Get dressed,” he said. “I don’t want to waste tonight.” He planted one more kiss on my lips before stepping back and opening his dresser.
I glanced at my crumpled shirt and slightly torn skirt on the floor, knowing there was no way I could possibly wear either of those.
“Did you, by chance, keep any of the stuff I hid in your drawer last summer, or did you throw it out?” I asked.
“Of course, I didn’t throw it out.” He opened his closet and thumbed through the hangers, taking out a pink hoodie and jeans.
“Thank you.” I managed, keeping my eyes on his as I dressed. Somehow, he seemed to get sexier with each passing second.
As if he was reading my mind, he stared back at me. “If you don’t put the rest of your clothes on, we will have to stay here tonight.”
“I’m still failing to see how that’s a bad thing.”
“Five minutes, Ari.” He turned around and grabbed his car keys. “Hurry up.”
“Fine.” I pulled the hoodie over my head and slipped into my shoes. I picked up my phone and noticed there was a new text message. My mom.
MOM: I heard about what happened at Gayle’s tonight…Told you so! Tell Carter I said hello, and make time to see me for more at least an hour before you leave. :-)
ME: What makes you think I wouldn’t make time to see my own mother before I left? You think I’m that obsessed? That rude?
“Ari?” Carter said my name, making me look up at him. “Are you ready?”
I said nothing, just stared at him—immediately wishing that I hadn’t gone for so long without talking to him. I was definitely going to have an even harder time saying goodbye this time.
“Ari?” he asked again, smiling and tilting his head to the side. “Is there a reason you’re sitting there, staring at me?”
“Nope.” I cleared my throat and looked at my phone again. “Just texting my mom back. I’ll be ready as soon as I send this.”
I touched the screen and noticed she’d sent me a new text: You’re not obsessed or rude, you’re just in love. And I KNOW you! :-)
Another text from her quickly followed: I just texted Carter. He promises to bring you by after you two catch up a bit more. See you then!
I didn’t get a chance to ask Carter about that. His arm was around my waist and he was pulling me with him, leading me out of his room and outside.
Just like the summer before, he held the door to his car open for me—letting his fingertips linger against my skin for a little longer than necessary. As I buckled my seatbelt, he looked over at me and cranked the engine—stirring up even more memories.
“I just remembered something,” I said. “Do you remember when you first got all those upgrades to this car?”
“Yeah, right before prom. Why?”
“You told me that the reason you got all that stuff done was to impress your date that night, and that you were going to—” I paused to make a gagging sound.
“That you were going to make sure that the first girl who saw the new upgrades was worth it, and it wasn’t all a waste.
You said you were going to make sure you had her in every position possible on your back seat. ”
“What’s your point?”
“Me and you hung out after prom, Carter. Granted, there were no such positions in the backseat, or anything like that, but you technically wasted your car’s big debut on me back then.”
Silence.
He adjusted the radio and turned to face me. “I didn’t waste anything on you. I think we both know that now.” He paused. “But I thought I slept with my date in the backseat a week after prom. Didn’t I?”
“You did.” I rolled my eyes and he laughed, giving me a light kiss before pulling off.
I shut my eyes as the familiar salty air of the city brushed against my face. The wind was cold for this time of year, but I declined Carter’s offer to let the top up. I wanted this moment to seem as close to old times as possible.
Miles past the main pier, his hand clasped mine behind the gear shift, and he ran his thumb along my knuckles as we approached a secluded shore.
Parking near the dock, he took off his hoodie and tossed it in the back seat. I followed suit, not caring to mention that “make-believe summer” or not, the water would probably be death-cold at this time of night.
“No, wait.” I shook my head as he held out his hand. “Let’s go somewhere else first.”
“Why?”
“Because, regardless of the fact that we haven’t talked to each other in forever, I’m convinced your mind is still wired to think that late night strolls on the beach equal breaking up with your girlfriend the very next day.”
“What?”
“You heard me.” I crossed my arms.
A slow smile spread across his lips, and I could tell he was trying his hardest not to laugh. “Get out of the car, Ari.”
I sat still, shaking my head at him.
“Ari…”
“What was wrong with the movies again?” I asked. “It would probably be a lot less cold there, don’t you think?”
He rolled his eyes and pulled me out of the car—tossing me over his shoulder.
“I just got you back a few hours ago.” He playfully slapped my ass. “I can guarantee I won’t be letting you go tomorrow.”
“What about the day after?”
“I can’t promise that one.” He tossed me into an oncoming wave before I could say anything else.
Shocked by the freezing cold, I screamed as he picked me up mid-laugh and tossed me into the water again. Then again.
I tried to escape him, to run back to the sand after each and every toss, but he always managed to grab my waist just in time.
“I miss this,” he said, helping me up after the umpteenth time. “I miss having you here.”
“I really wish I could say the same.” I splashed the shit out of him and swam away, unknowingly starting an hour-long back and forth chase.