Chapter 39
ELENA
Buck gets me moving toward the hallway. His actions aren’t hurried, but there’s a decisiveness in them that makes my knees weaken.
Weston stays close behind, his hand spanning my stomach as his mouth finds the sensitive spot behind my ear.
Calder comes along beside me, one hand at my lower back and the other skimming down my arm until our fingers lace.
By the time the four of us cover the short distance to Buck’s bedroom, my whole body is humming.
Tonight, he leaves the lamp off. Light comes in from the hallway, but in the room’s semi-darkness, the men seem bigger and closer, and every touch feels more intimate.
While Buck kisses me, Weston slides my pants down my legs. Buck breaks away just as Calder lifts my sweater over my head, and then their hands are all over my bare skin, stroking and teasing, making me hotter and hungrier with each second that passes.
They work together so well, I have to wonder if they ran contingencies for this situation, too.
As Weston’s rough but skilled hands caress my hips, my thighs, and the backs of my knees, Buck and Calder both tug the cups of my bra down and latch onto my breasts, the hot strokes of their tongues making my head fall back.
It should be chaos, but it only feels inevitable, like something that was always going to happen. And beneath all the heat and desire, there’s an unmistakable tenderness that keeps catching me off guard.
It’s in the way Buck pauses to make sure I’m okay every time the action changes, the way Weston keeps touching my face, my throat, and my wrist, as if he needs to connect with my pulse, and the way Calder looks up at me like he’s wrecked by how much he wants me, as his mouth does devilish things to my nipples, licking, nipping, and teasing me with the rough scruff of hair on his face.
When all my clothes are gone, and every inch of my bare skin has been touched and tasted, Buck lifts me onto the bed.
I draw Weston down with me for a kiss, while Calder kneels behind me to press his mouth to my shoulder.
Buck stands there for a moment, watching with an expression so raw and openly affected, a new rush of heat floods through me.
I hold out a hand to him, and as he climbs onto the bed with us, something deeper moves across his face that I feel in my own chest.
I kiss Buck while Weston’s hands glide over my thighs. Calder runs his mouth down my spine, and I arch into him. Weston presses a thumb into my slick heat and strokes my clit while Buck cups my breasts in both hands, then feasts on them.
I pull Weston’s shirt off, push him onto his back, climb over him, and make him lose that careful composure he wears like a second skin. I reach for Buck’s belt as I pull Calder down to kiss me at the same time, and the heat between us keeps rising.
Every time one of them looks at me, I feel something settle more deeply into place. And every time I touch them, they feel more like mine. Not in the sense of ownership, but belonging.
They’re mine, and I’m theirs, and no one is left out.
I get Buck’s cock out of his pants and eagerly wrap my mouth around it as everything accelerates from hungry exploration into something deeper and more desperate.
Weston pinches my nipples with rough fingertips, while Calder spreads my legs and buries his face there, making me cry out his name around Buck’s cock.
I refocus and suck harder on Buck, loving the taste of him as I challenge myself to take him deeper. He groans and palms the back of my head, telling me how beautiful I am and how good I’m making him feel.
Calder’s tongue presses inside me, fluttering, as his fingers spread me open. When he circles my clit, then sucks it gently between his lips, my body jerks. He keeps at it, slower, softer, then faster and faster, and suddenly, I see stars.
Hands—I don’t know whose—hold me as I lose control, my pussy throbbing at Calder’s mouth, waves of pleasure pulling me under again and again.
It starts a chain reaction. When my eyes open, Buck’s usual iron composure is long gone. His body stiffens, his head tips back, and he erupts with a low, animal sound. His cock swells, then starts to release in my mouth, hot spurts of cum shooting down my throat.
I take what I can, but I’m still recovering from my own release, and Calder’s still licking, and I can barely hold myself upright.
Buck pulls off his t-shirt and uses it to wipe my face, kissing me as he goes.
When I’m able, I reach for Weston and take him in my mouth. Calder repositions himself behind me, and while I’m on my knees, swiping my tongue over Weston’s rock-hard cock, Calder nudges his own at my drenched opening.
Buck slides in beneath me, flexible for a man his size, and sucks on my nipples as I suck on Weston, and Calder fills my pussy. I’m connected to all of them, physically now as well as emotionally, and the way it feels so right, when it’s always seemed so complicated, is a revelation.
We come together over and over, in ways I’ll never get over. I find myself gripping hands that aren’t the same pair as someone braces me against their chest, and someone else’s voice whispers roughly in my ear when I start to shake.
Buck stops managing, Calder no longer holds himself apart, and Weston loses every bit of control. So do I.
“That’s it, sweetheart,” Weston says, as I ride Buck’s cock and stroke Calder’s in my hand.
“Look at you.” Buck’s voice is raw, reverent, and wrecked.
I look down at where my body is spread open, taking him inside me in long, deep strokes, then I look around at the three of them, all hard muscle, heat, and devotion.
“All of you,” I say, like a promise and a prayer.
Buck closes his eyes briefly, like the words hit him deep. Weston kisses me, and Calder presses his forehead to mine.
Somewhere deep in the middle of the night, when I run out of energy, we rest, even though the men seem like they could keep going until morning.
I’m half draped over Buck’s broad chest, with one of Weston’s arms flung across my waist. Calder’s stretched along my back, keeping me warm better than any blanket.
The room smells like men and sex, and the silence glows now, all the earlier sparks burned down to something deeper.
“That felt official.” Buck’s voice is low in the dim room, and I laugh, though I’m surprised my body has the energy to produce the sound.
Weston’s fingers trace lazy circles against my side. “Official,” he agrees.
Calder makes a sleepy sound that might be a laugh, too. “Pretty sure there are easier ways to define a relationship.”
“I liked this way,” I murmur, making all three of them chuckle.
Buck strokes my back in an uncharacteristically lazy way. “So did I.”
I lift my head enough to look at each of them, one by one. “I meant what I said,” I tell them.
Buck’s hand stills. “So did we.”
“You didn’t actually say anything, though,” I tease. “I’m an educator. Use your words.”
Calder laughs more fully as Buck lifts his head and tips my chin so I’m looking directly at him.
“I love you,” he says. There’s no hesitation and no qualifier. I already knew it in my heart, but hearing the words makes emotion swell so hard my chest suddenly aches.
Weston leans in and presses a kiss to my shoulder. “I love you, too.”
“I’m in this,” Calder says in a rough voice. “For real. For however long we get. I love you.”
My eyes sting, and I don’t try to hide it.
Buck brushes his thumb under my eyes to catch the tears. “No crying after sex.”
“That’s not a real rule.” I’m smiling through the tears.
“It is now,” Calder says.
Weston kisses my cheek, then the corner of my mouth. “You’re outnumbered.”
I tuck myself further into the warm center of them and let out a long breath. “Just the way I want it.”
For the first time since Tyler died, I feel like I’m inside my life again, fully alive. I feel rooted and chosen.
We all chose each other, and we’ll face whatever is waiting out in the darkness in a way we couldn’t before tonight.
Together. As a family.