Chapter 31 Jax
Ipulled up to Stefani’s farmhouse at three p.m. sharp, just like I promised.
I knew Faye started her shift at six p.m.—it was amusing she didn’t think I knew that.
I knew too much about Faye. I watched my little ljos every night while she pleasured herself, most likely to think of me.
Despite the cameras, I knew her like nobody else did.
Like the fact that I knew she was watching scary movies while drowning in tears, overdoing it with chocolate and popcorn.
Faye may have changed in some ways, but I knew her down to her core.
The girl hated crying in front of anyone, and she would only let herself feel the deepest things alone.
Faye didn’t know how to ask for help or be weak in front of people.
I’d only seen her like that once and I hoped I’d never witness it again.
I knocked on the door waiting for Faye to come down, which felt all too nostalgic.
She came down in a gray long sleeve crop top that hugged her neck and full breasts tight, exactly where I liked to bite her.
I already disliked this shirt. Not because she didn’t look amazing in it, but because that was my sweet spot and I liked easy access.
Her black jeans hugged her curves perfectly.
What really had me in a sweat was her black combat boots.
I bit my tattooed knuckles. Could I get through the night with just words and no touching?
Her long, dark hair was my favorite. It made me want to do bad things to it, like pull it right around my Reaper ring.
I needed to stop. This woman drove me crazy and all she had to do was breathe in my presence.
I was weak for her. She was my own personal kryptonite.
“Are you ready,” she asked, breaking my train of thought and grabbing her leather jacket.
“Yeah, hop on.” I smirked and handed her her helmet. Because that’s what it was. It was hers. We pulled up to the brick-walled arcade, both of us in awe at the significant change. It was still our Ellm’s Arcade, just with some polished tweaks.
“It looks exactly as I remember it.” Faye hopped off my Harley.
I noticed her silence during the ride here—something was bothering my girl.
I could sense when anything was wrong with her.
No matter the time nor the distance. I knew she had been struggling for weeks.
I felt her dread like a knife stuck in my lungs, suffocating my air.
I had to get her out, away from those walls where I know she lets her bad thoughts win and they caved her in.
The arcade buzzed with game commotion galore, filling the air with noises, and charms from all the games chirping and ringing in every corner, and the aroma of freshly made churros and buttered popcorn.
Everything was renovated, from the freshly painted brick walls, to the gothic style hardwood floors—horror being the theme of the arcade.
Vintage horror comics and films hung from the painted walls in gold frames, spooky decorations hung from the lights, and little bats and witch hats swept across the ceiling.
The bar was full of people who were drinking and playing pool and other games.
Whispers and stares began to buzz as we walked through the arcade.
I squeezed my girl’s hand tighter, so she knew I was right here with her, and not giving a damn what these lowlifes thought.
Some of the games were new, except a few, and I led her to one in particular.
“No way?” she gasped, and sat down at the wheel, pretending to drive it. “I can’t believe they kept this one!”
“I can,” I said cheekily.
“What did you do, Jax?” Faye asked me suspiciously from behind the arcade wheel.
“Okay, I may have convinced the new owners to keep this one,” I mumbled, hiding behind my hat.
Faye smiled wide. “Why?” she asked, gazing at me with her doe-brown eyes.
“You know why,” I said, as we stared at each other intensely in utter silence, the energy between us becoming intense.
“So, are you ready to get your ass kicked again, or what?” she asked me teasingly.
“Is that a challenge, Faye Robles?” I challenged her right back, sensing the sparkle in her eye. There she was, my little ljos.
We played games, and the hour went by quickly. Too quick for my liking. And we finally sat down for some pizza. Faye didn’t hesitate to dive in. I just watched as she ate.
“What?” she asked, looking up at me with pizza in her mouth. I tried so hard not to laugh. Some things never really change.
“Nothing, just memories,” I replied, handing her a napkin, the moment catching swiftly between us.
Faye looked away, breaking our eye contact as I wiped her mouth.
Gods she was beautiful, even with sauce on her face.
The truth was, it wasn’t just about getting Faye out of the house.
It was about talking to her about what the fuck we were doing.
Not that I didn’t enjoy making her come, but her and I have always been much deeper than that.
I needed to talk to her. I needed her to know this wasn’t just sex.
I wanted her fully. I wanted her. My heart was pounding inside my chest.
“Hey, before we go, I wanted to talk to you,” I said, stopping her as we stood outside the arcade doors.
“About what?” Faye asked nervously.
“About this. Us,” I said, pointing between us both. Faye was dead silent. I could tell she was looking for her words. She was waiting for me to say whatever was on my chest. Words I’ve wanted to say for five years, and now here was my chance.
“Well, if it isn’t the high school sweethearts,” a pesky annoying voice interrupted us.
I knew that voice anywhere. Cindy Martinez.
Fuck, she would be here. Of all the days.
“Well, looks like you’ve moved on fast, and went right back to Little Miss Too-Good-For-This-Town Robles,” Cindy spat at Faye.
Faye looked at me, embarrassed and hurt. Her stare beat me to a bloody pulp. Fuck. I may have forgotten to mention Cindy and I were in a relationship for four months. Four excruciating and painfully dull months.
“What the hell is she talking about, Jax?” Faye asked, livid.
“Cindy, you and I have been done for eight months,” I said sternly.
Cindy looked at Faye, disgusted.
“You and Cindy dated?” Faye whispered, looking at me for answers.
“Awe, you didn’t tell her, Jaxy poo, that you fucked me in your barn?” Cindy said snobbishly, as she chuckled with her friends, walking off into the arcade.
I am so fucked. I felt Faye’s eyes burn into my skull like a red laser beam. Faye became furious and hit my arm with her purse.
“You pinche puto! I knew it! I knew this was some sick fucking game to you! You fucked her in your barn, where you had me the other night? You bastard!” she screamed, hate seeping out of her eyes, the betrayal marking her.
It forged her like a hot rod iron. Faye stood there and I didn’t know what to possibly say to calm her down.
Except for everything I shouldn’t say. Which I was getting too good at.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize we were supposed to go over our dating history in the last five years.
Plus, you were married, remember? To an older man, months after miscarrying our child?
” Regret filled my lungs as soon as the words spilled out of me, like a seeping volcano ready to explode.
Yup, I had done it. The look on her face said everything I needed to know. The regret had taken me in an undertow.
“How long are you going to use that against me?” she seethed, her eyes spewing pure hot hatred at me. My throat suddenly became constricted. What the hell? “I thought we were past that?” Faye shouted at me, as I tried to gasp for air.
“No, you’re past it. I’m not,” I replied, my voice muffled by the constriction in my throat. Faye looked at me like she was at a loss for words, for once in her life.
“Is that what you think, that I’m over what happened?” she shouted, as I began clawing at my neck, my air escaping me like a violent thief.
“Isn’t that why you left, Faye?” I asked, gasping for air. I didn’t care, she could kill me a thousand times, and I’d still come back, fuck her silly, and love her deeply. Faye walked closer to me as I fell to my knees, swallowing air. This was not how I wanted this conversation to go.
“No, you left. You left like the coward that you are. At least I was brave enough to feel it. How dare you, Grimwood!” Faye shouted at me, pointing to me as her eyes shifted into a marble black, darker than any soul I’ve ever hunted.
Car windows burst into shambles on the cobblestone street, and sirens wailed in the distance.
“It was for the best, remember?” Her words stabbed me as soon as they fell from her lips.
The pain wasn’t from my air being taken from me, but from her words cutting me deeply, a wound too fresh to touch, still after all this time.
“Bean was my baby, too.” I stood my ground.
I knew she couldn’t hurt me, but if it was what it would take for her to get over the pain, I’d let her.
I’d take every damn blow, just so the pain wouldn’t touch her.
My little ljos. Faye stood there, shocked by my statement.
I was seething between each breath, my vision becoming cloudy.
She released her hold on me and I gasped for air, letting the oxygen fill my burning lungs. Faye began to walk away.
No, she would hear me this time. She would not walk away from me again without letting me speak my peace, my truth. Standing from my knees, I called out to her.
“It’s haunted me for the last five years and I’m sick of acting like it didn’t happen.
I’m sick of acting like it still doesn’t tear me apart, Faye.
You won’t even talk about it. Do you even think about it?
Did you even think about me? I need you, Faye.
It’s always been you… in here,” I said, tapping my chest. There it was.
The words I wanted to tell her for five years. It fell silent, too silent.
Faye stopped in her tracks and turned to me, tears falling from her desolate eyes. “I have to go. I’m going to be late,” she replied. This is what she did. She always ran.
“How long are you going to keep running from me, Faye?” I asked her as my voice cracked.
She didn’t answer, she just looked at me.
Her silence was all the answer I needed.
I dropped her off at the bar and the ride was dead silent.
I didn’t bother to say anything more to her and just took off.
I think this time, she broke me. Well, well, how the tables have turned.
I deserved everything I got from her. I clung to my restricted throat, her strength surprising me.
She didn’t seem startled; she was taking the very air from me, but with a simple glance.
I groaned, amazed at her capabilities, and so soon.
My little ljos was ready to detonate, and I would be there aiding her, to push all the buttons. I knew it wouldn’t be easy.
I knew Faye would fight me until the very end because that’s just who my stubborn little brat was.
I chuckled at her attempt to choke me to death.
How I loved watching her be enraged with power.
The conversation did not go at all how I imagined.
I knew it was a sensitive topic, and I knew there was a chance she would lose it on me.
Which I was already prepared for. But the next time, I’d make sure I’d be doing the choking.
What delicate timing, Cindy fucking Martinez.