Chapter 36 Faye
Would Vadon really hurt me, in the middle of nowhere, while our child was in the car? Sometimes I question my own reality. Like maybe I was insane and the last five years weren’t real. Was this the reality I was really living in? I looked at myself in the mirror and realized it, too, was real.
Vadon was already at the meeting spot, waiting in his Cadillac, which was paid for by none other than his father—a spoon-fed asshole in all his glory.
My heart raced and I could feel a panic surface within myself.
I wanted to cave within myself. Freeze right here.
No, I told myself. I’m not that girl anymore.
I’ve fought, I’ve survived this long, and I wasn’t going back to being that subdued girl anymore.
I’ve come too far to let this man put me back in that headspace ever again.
Birdie jumped out of the car and ran to me in her cute gel sandals.
“Mama!” I lifted her in my arms and hugged her so tight, kissing her all over her face while she chuckled.
I wasn’t going to give Vadon an ounce of my energy.
Not a glance, not a ‘hello’. He didn’t deserve anything from me, but to see that I was doing well and unbothered.
I buckled Birdie in as fast as I could, ready to fly back home and have us back where we belonged. Safe with me, and Ma, and Jax.
I turned around and there he was, making me jolt and my anxiety peak.
“What are you doing, Vadon?” I asked, trying to move past him to make it to my door.
“Can we please just talk,” Vadon simmered. I managed to slide by him and open my door. He stood there, holding it open with his arm, not allowing me inside my vehicle.
“There’s nothing to talk about. Please move your hand off my door,” I demanded, fear sneaking its way into my bones.
He refused. “Faye, please, I can’t do this. I want my family back,” he begged. I tried grabbing my door to close it but he refused. I started to panic as we struggled. “Do you still love me, Faye?” he asked, his tone sinister.
“What?” My fight or flight had sparked instantly. Except this time, I wasn’t frozen. I was ready to fight. I turned to face him with no more fear left in me, just simmering anger. “No, I don’t. We are done. Let me leave!” I demanded him as I struggled to shut my door.
He just held it, coming closer. “I don’t believe you!” he shouted at me, his tone threatening.
“You couldn’t love this new person I am, even if you tried, Vadon!
” My voice was thick like lava. His car alarm went off and my skin started buzzing, feeling the hairs stand up all over my body.
“You don’t know what love is!” I shouted at him in protest, as an ominous gust of wind pushed him back and he stumbled over his own feet.
He looked at me in complete shock.
I took another step toward him, announcing my bravery. “Now let me go, or I swear to the gods I’m calling the cops!” The street lights broke one by one above us, shattering into the streets.
A look of disdain crossed his defeated face. “Okay,” he pleaded, backing away from me, foot by foot, carefully.
I slammed my door shut and locked it, driving away as fast as I could, fear overcoming me.
I watched as he stood there in fury, looking at my car drive away in the rearview mirror.
Except when I looked back, his eyes were pitch black and he was smiling, as if he were a lunatic.
I blinked and he was suddenly gone, driving away.
I took a deep breath, calming myself. I turned up the music loud so Birdie wouldn’t hear me cry, drowning out my sobs and breathing through the anxiety attack.
What the fuck just happened, what was that?
I had no explanation for any of it. Something stirred in my soul, power and fear mixing like water and oil.