Chapter Four #3
“Jasper?” Archie’s voice asked gently. It made Jasper realize that he’d been lost in his thoughts. He shook his head, trying to put them into some kind of order that made sense. “I was just thinking about everything we just said.”
Archie nodded. “This is a difficult situation for you. You identify with too many of the players.”
Jasper wasn’t even surprised that Archie understood. He knew Jasper’s past and his history. He could see the similarities. “We obviously can’t bring Daniel back from the dead, but maybe we can give his partner peace.”
“Well, at the very least, we can try giving her what she’s paying me for. I just think it depends on who the killer is.”
“And why they’re doing it.” If it was revenge, Jasper could understand. He might even share the decision depending on what Daniel and the other two had done. Had Daniel been the one to kill his parents? Or maybe the killer’s parents?
Jasper groaned. “We need to know more about the night of the sanctuary.”
“I agree, but the hunters’ reports aren’t helping us, and Sarah told you that she wasn’t there that night. It’s the only reason she survived.”
“She’s not the only survivor. I survived, too, as did the killer.”
“You’re not going to find out what happened to the killer that night unless they decide to tell you.”
“What about other hunters who might have been there? Do we have names?”
But Archie shook his head. “We don’t. You’ve seen the report. I was actually lucky to find Daniel’s name on any of them.”
Jasper rubbed his face. “I’m going to have to talk to Leroy, aren’t I?”
“Not if you don’t want to. I would never ask that of you, not for a case.”
“Except that it wouldn’t be for a case. I want to know what’s happening as much as you do, even though no one’s paying me for it.”
Archie was silent for a moment. He was watching Jasper, and Jasper knew he had something on his mind. He wasn’t sure he wanted to hear it.
If he didn’t, Archie would let it go. Jasper knew he just had to say the words. Part of him felt like maybe he needed to hear this.
“Go ahead,” he told Archie.
Archie shook his head, smiling. “I know it’s not going to change anything, this or anything or the way you feel about all of this, but what happened that night isn’t going to change the person you are now.
It’s not going to change the fact that I love you, that Kerry and Corey do.
I understand why you want to find out, and I’ll support you, but I don’t want you to feel bad if we can’t ever get confirmation of anything.
We’ll be lucky if we manage to find the killer.
For now, we don’t have any names or even a place to start. ”
Jasper couldn’t say he’d been tortured by what was happening since finding out he was a monster.
It had taken him a little while to get used to the knowledge, but Archie was right.
It didn’t change who he was, and knowing what he was hadn’t made him feel any differently.
That was probably because he’d always been a monster, even though he hadn’t known it.
But finding out what happened at the sanctuary wasn’t going to change anything, and it wouldn’t bring his parents back.
Maybe he’d want to get revenge if he found out who had killed them, but at the same time, while he did want to know more about them, he didn’t have any special connection to them.
They were his biological parents, but he couldn’t remember them.
He might be angry that someone had taken that from him, but it was a muted kind of anger.
“I think that the only person who can give us answers is the killer,” he said. “Which means that we have to find them before the hunters do. You know what they’re going to do otherwise.”
“You don’t want to kill the killer?”
Archie’s tone made it obvious that if that was what Jasper wanted, Archie would be on board.
Maybe Jasper should be horrified, but he’d grown up with the hunters.
He’d worked as a hunter for years. He’d seen things that no normal human being would think were okay, but hunters didn’t blink an eye at it.
That went for him, too. It was one of the reasons he’d left.
“I want answers,” he said. “I want to know why they’re doing what they’re doing.
They haven’t hurt anyone I care about, and maybe it’s callous, but I can’t help but wonder if Daniel and the other two deserved it.
Considering they were hunters, probably, just like I would deserve to be hurt or killed for some of the things I’ve done. ”
Archie reached over to take Jasper’s hand. “You’re not a hunter anymore.”
“Neither was Daniel.” And maybe one day, someone would come after Jasper for something he’d done while he was a hunter, just like it had happened to Daniel.
Maybe Jasper would die, too, or maybe not.
Whatever the outcome of that, Jasper wasn’t going to obsess over it, not when it wasn’t happening.
No, for now, he would focus on finding the killer instead of worrying about hypothetical killers coming after him.