Chapter 20 – Jarred #2
She gave out a loud cry that hurt his ears and the sheath opened, revealing the tiniest dagger he had ever seen. It shone blood red and pulsed in the light. “I carry it still, as a reminder,” Wave said before sheathing it again and returning it to harmless-looking jewelry.
“A reminder of what?”
“That freedom always has a price.” Now she turned her eyes back to meet his.
“I wanted to tell you because Sinister was right. If you didn’t know, nothing between us could ever be real, no matter how long it lasted.
It would always be a lie.” A self-deprecating smile rose to her lips, twisting her mouth.
“I should have known better. My kind doesn’t get happy endings. ”
“Wave, I—”
“You don’t have to explain. I get it,” she said. “You’d never be able to trust a siren. You’d never know if what you felt was real. You could never love a creature like me.”
“Wave, stop—” But she was on a roll now, unstoppable like a tide. She shook her head.
“Really, there was no way to win here. This was way too soon, rushed. Me dumping this information on you puts you in danger. Forces you to choose.” She smiled again, but there was nothing nice in that smile. “And if I waited, I’d be deceiving you longer. I’d be endangering you in other ways.”
She faced the sea again and Jarred waited a moment to see if she was done talking. She was. He thought about what she had just said. Telling him did force his hand to a degree. She was right about that.
He tried to imagine how he would feel if they were having this discussion five years from now. She was right about that, too. He’d be furious that she hadn’t told him. And hurt. Hurt that she hadn’t trusted him.
Sharply, he looked over at her. She was trusting him now. Enough to put her life on the line by telling him. Slowly, he blinked, trying to clear his head. She was half stormbringer, half siren. There had been wars started before to get a hold of someone as powerful as her.
“I won’t tell anyone,” he said. Wave only tensed up. “I don’t know what to think, Wave.” This time, her name rolled off his tongue a bit easier. He thought about all the times they’d spent together and how he had thought she was starved for affection.
They had all pushed her. Marc had wrangled a fake girlfriend status out of her. If she really wanted to manipulate them, why would she have settled for something like that? Or the time when Hellion and Marc had lashed out at her. She had taken their side.
Jarred gritted his teeth and moved quickly. He had Wave pinned beneath him on the pier in a second and he refused to move when she pushed his shoulders. She could blast him off if she really wanted to get free.
“Let’s get something clear, right now, precious,” he snarled at her. Wave’s eyes widened and her pulse sped up. “You won’t ever again take a hit just because you think you should.”
“What?”
He could see she was confused and not following his train of thought, but she stopped pushing him. Jarred leaned even closer, so their breaths mingled.
“I don’t care if it’s me, Marc, Hellion, or even fucking Irishen lashing out at you. You won’t take the blame for something like that ever again.”
She gave a tiny shake of her head. “You and Risha are big on dictating what I won’t do.”
“What did he tell you not to do?” Jarred let his weight lie more firmly against her.
“Hide my aura,” Wave muttered, with a small roll of her eyes.
“I think I might get along with him after all,” Jarred murmured. Now, for the first time, Wave snarled, showing true emotion.
“Like I could run around with all of this loose! It would get me killed,” she screamed.
Power surged over Jarred. It didn’t hurt exactly, but he felt the weight of it, more than in the courtyard, and it felt different.
Wilder, with a cutting edge. She wasn’t trying to pull back the immense swell of it, nor the flavor.
Now that they were pressed together, Jarred felt her gasping for breath, felt the thrum in his blood, the echo of hers. He could sense the need driving her, the call of the ocean, so close, the need to lose herself in the depths of it. Bone-deep yearning to be free. To be herself.
He tasted salt on his lips as he kissed the tears falling to her cheeks. Wave clung to him as she sobbed. Thunder rumbled and clouds built up to hide the sun away. Rain poured down, hard and fast, thrumming against his back and soaking them both.
“Look at me,” he whispered. Her eyes met his, still filled with tears.
“Thank you,” he said. She blinked, once again lost, and Jarred grinned.
It felt good not to be the only one lost in this situation.
Still, he didn’t want to hurt her, so he leaned down until their lips brushed lightly. “Thank you for telling me.”
“But I—you…” Wave hiccupped.
“I care about you a lot, precious. It must have been terrifying to tell me something like this, but I’m happy you are giving me—us a chance to work it out.”
“Yo-you want to work it out,” she stammered.
“Yes,” Jarred said simply and kissed her again softly. “I believe that you would never manipulate how I feel. We have to talk about some ground rules about the rest, though.”
A lightbulb went off in his head. The time she had walked out of his room, leaving him behind confused and unable to follow, she had used her siren’s voice. That had to be it! “The break-up,” he murmured. “That’s how you got me to let you go! Naughty, little siren.”
Wave blanched, but Jarred just rolled them over so she was lying on top of him and moved his hands to cup her ass. When he smiled up at her, the rain started to lessen. He was holding her lightly, but she wasn’t trying to get away from him. Jarred took that as a good sign.
“You’re not… mad?” she whispered.
To his surprise, he wasn’t. She’d been hurt and done that to protect herself. “No, little siren. I’m not mad.”
“And you want to… work things out?” Hesitantly, Wave reached out and cupped his cheek. Her hand trembled and the wariness in her eyes stabbed Jarred straight to the heart.
“Yes, Wave. I was halfway in love with you before all of this and that’s all on me. I want a chance to go all the way. A real one, where you’re not holding back from me and from that possibility, no matter how hard it might be for you. Can you do that for me, precious?”