25. 25
The next day was cloudy and gray, perfectly matching the tone of the villa. Callum and I weren’t the only ones on a complicated path.
The night before, Chiara had been brought to tears by Adam, who was not happy that after choosing to stay matched with him, she was still spending so much time with Hugh.
When Jess and I went into the villa to comfort her, the drama had only continued.
Hugh confronted Adam about making Chiara cry.
Things got heated, and they had to be separated by producers for the rest of the evening.
It was a quiet goodnight when we all went to bed and an even quieter morning. The gloomy weather didn’t help matters, and a somberness permeated the villa for most of the day.
I knew I needed to try and get Callum and me back on track with our deal, that we needed to keep hanging out more.
But something in his reaction the night before had my own guard shooting back up.
I felt oddly sensitive and didn’t think I could handle his coldness, so I avoided him the best I could.
The producers must have picked up on everyone’s dour mood because after lunch, as I was drifting off to a lovely nap on one of the daybeds, a voice came over the speakers.
“All Bellas to the fire pit, please,” it said.
Groaning at the interruption of my plan to lie around for the rest of the day, I scooted off the bed and made my way across the lawn.
The fire pit had been removed from the middle of the circular deck and in its place was a round table, on top of which sat a glass fishbowl with strips of folded paper inside.
It seemed we would be playing a game. The producer side of my brain understood that it would be an excellent way to both shake up a very boring day and also fan the flames simmering under the surface of many matches in the villa.
Jess grabbed the instruction card from the table and read it out loud.
“Bellas, it’s time for a game of ‘dare.’ Every completed dare is one point. If you make it to ten points, you’ll win a party this evening.”
Everyone cheered at the mention of winning a prize. I didn’t want to be the downer by pointing out that every night here was essentially a party and that it wasn’t much of a prize to win, so I stuck to smiling and clapping along with the others.
Jess looked around, wiggling her eyebrows as she picked the first dare out of the bowl and read from the paper.
“Kiss the Bella you think is the fittest,” she said.
Standing up, she walked around in a circle, passing us all and hamming it up. Everyone cheered and clapped, excited to see who she would choose.
Stopping in front of Chiara, she yelled out, “I’m kissing the Bella I think is the fittest who should never cry because of some silly little boy.
” She side-eyed Adam, throwing her words in his face, before leaning down and pecking Chiara on the lips.
Adam huffed and crossed his arms, less than thrilled.
Oh, yes. The producers definitely knew what they were doing with this game.
Chiara went next, having to lick the toes of the Bella seated next to her. Then it was Liam, who had to give a lap dance to the Bella of his choice.
Ella was up after that, and when she picked her piece of paper out of the bowl, her eyebrows rose in glee.
“Kiss the Bella who you think is the biggest game player,” she read out.
Now it’s getting interesting.
Ella looked around at the group before walking over and giving James a kiss on the cheek.
It surprised me she didn’t give him a real kiss and that she had even picked him at all.
I hadn’t noticed them spending a lot of time in close proximity since James had entered the villa.
Something in my gut pulled in suspicion.
What was it that made Ella choose James?
I didn’t have long to reflect on it because James was laughing it off and then drawing his own slip of paper.
“Kiss the Bella you would most want to be matched with other than your current partner,” he said.
He got up and looked around. His eyes caught mine and my blood iced over.
Oh, no. This would not be good.
Walking toward me, he grabbed my hand and pulled me up, so we were standing face to face. Time seemed to slow down, and everything got quiet as he leaned his mouth down to mine and kissed me.
James was kissing me, and then I was kissing him, and then we were making out. On national television.
The kiss felt like both an eternity and a split second, and then suddenly, it was over and James was pulling away. He gave me a wink before walking back to where he had been sitting.
Still in a daze, I tried to keep myself moving.
I picked my dare out of the bowl and was thrilled to find it did not include kissing or lap dances or toe licking.
All I had to do was say who I thought was the funniest Bella.
I easily chose Jess and then it was over. I survived my first Bella Amore game.
Sitting back down, I kept my eyes straight ahead on the bowl of dares, trying to play it cool.
But inside, I was freaking out as I replayed the moment over and over. That kiss had been incredible, and I found myself wishing it had gone on even longer. Coupled with the pure surprise that James had chosen me out of everyone, it was no wonder I was having trouble calming my heart rate.
James, who I had so quickly written off in pursuit of Callum’s offer.
James, who was currently looking at me from across the fire pit deck.
I tried to ignore his gaze, tried to focus on the game around me.
To no one’s surprise, we won the party that evening.
***
The “party” was really just a few streamers hung around the yard and an extra drink allowed. All things considered, it wasn’t too bad a reward for a silly game of dare.
Even with the extra drink, though, I couldn’t shake the feeling of unease that had slowly been building since the game.
Callum hadn’t looked at me afterward when everyone hopped in the pool for a celebratory swim.
He didn’t spare me a glance during the toast or at any point when we were in the same group all evening.
In fact, anytime I would join a conversation he was part of, he would quickly make up an excuse to walk away.
What was even more confusing was that I couldn’t tell what he was thinking.
Was he trying to build up a more dramatic storyline for us over my kiss with James?
If so, then he should have confronted me, orchestrating some kind of blowout fight that would have garnered more screen time.
Acting like I didn’t exist wasn’t good TV.
And, honestly, for the show or not, it felt kind of mean to flat out ignore me.
The thought that he might actually be upset about the kiss flashed across my mind, but I was quick to squash it. That wasn’t what we were doing here.
“Are you and Callum okay after that kiss with James?” Jess asked me as we sat on the daybeds.
“Honestly, I have no idea. I think he’s avoiding me,” I told her.
“He acts unbothered, but under the surface I think the bloke’s really a big softie,” she said. “Did you know that he was the one who helped smooth things over with Adam and Hugh after their fight last night? And he sat with Chiara today for a while. She said he was really kind.”
I didn't know any of that. I guess while I had been buried in my own head, Callum was running about, establishing himself as the villa hero. The new bit of knowledge only fueled my own confusion. Callum was a sweetheart to everyone else, just not me?
“Do you regret deading it with James?” Jess asked, voicing aloud the very question I had been pondering since the game of dare.
Had I made a mistake in turning my back on pursuing James and instead choosing to stay with Callum?
I let out a sigh and leaned back against the daybed’s pillows.
I thought I was being strategic, rigging the system in my favor by accepting Callum’s offer. And yet I was simply more confused than ever. Had I closed myself off to the possibility of a real connection because I was desperate to stay in the villa?
I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about my kiss with James all afternoon. It had been good, the kind of toe-curling, butterfly-inducing kiss that feels rare and special.
But even as the warmth of his lips had lingered against my own, even as I replayed the event in my mind once again as I considered Jess’ question, I knew that James as a match was a wild card.
Despite our clear physical connection, I didn’t actually know if he was even interested in me.
He had been here for days and, aside from our initial date, had made no real attempt to get to know me.
Ella’s decision during the game to pick him as the biggest player flashed through my mind, clarifying what I had known all along.
There was no safety in him as a match. It was too much of a risk to be with James, despite how tingly he might make me feel.
And besides, the thought of actually choosing to seek out a real romantic connection in the villa was so outrageous that it snapped me out of whatever mental spiral I was teetering on the edge of. I needed to get a grip; I was here for my own reasons, and I needed to remember that.
Love was a game I couldn’t afford to play.
I looked out across the pool to where Callum sat with Hugh, chatting and laughing. Of course it had been the right move to pick him. It would have been reckless not to.
“Have you tried pulling Callum for a chat?” Jess asked, seeing where my gaze had drifted. “Maybe he doesn’t want to bother you with his feelings,” she suggested.
Maybe she was right. Maybe he was waiting for me to talk to him. I was the one who had been kissed, after all.
“Should I try to pull him now?” I asked.
It was funny, the lingo of the villa which had slowly seeped into my way of speaking. A month ago I would have never asked if I should “pull a guy.” It really didn’t even make sense grammatically, but I had quickly learned that things in the villa rarely made sense on paper.
“Yeah, go on. I’ll walk over with you. He’s talking to Hugh, and I can pretend I’m pulling him, so then you can take his place.”
“That’s brilliant,” I said as we got up off the daybed.
Walking over to where Callum and Hugh sat across from each other on the pool loungers, I tried to tamp down my nerves.
Jess was probably right; maybe he didn’t want to bother me with what he was feeling.
Maybe he wasn’t feeling anything at all.
Maybe he simply thought this was the more dramatic approach to drawing out a story line for us.
“Hiya, boys,” Jess called out as we approached them. “Hugh, fancy a chat over at the fire pit?” she asked, nodding her head across the lawn.
“Yeah, of course,” Hugh replied, getting up and following her.
Taking the opportunity to snag Hugh’s seat from him, I plopped down on the lounger directly across from Callum.
He looked less than pleased at the change of company.
“Hi,” I said. I wasn’t sure what he was thinking, so I wasn’t sure where to start.
“Hi,” he said back, looking anywhere but me.
“Are you mad at me?” I blurted out, getting right to it.
He finally looked at me, but I was still confused. He didn’t look mad, but his eyes were guarded, and that cold, indifferent gaze I had the misfortune of coming to know so well had returned.
I found myself slightly crushed to see it come back.
Shaking off the feeling of disappointment, I continued. “Well? You’ve been ignoring me ever since James kissed me.”
Callum was quiet for a beat before letting out a small sigh.
“Do you want to be matched with him?” he asked, gazing across at me so intently that I had to look away.
“What?” I sputtered, thrown off by the turn our conversation had suddenly taken.
“James. Do you want to be with him instead of me?”
“I chose you,” I said.
“That’s not what I’m asking.”
I knew what he meant. Knew that he was really talking about our deal and if I wanted to stick with it or call the whole thing off.
I looked across at him, the man who it felt like I’d already been on a very long journey with. We had found the early stages of a truce only a day ago, but it felt like we had once again veered off course. I wasn’t sure how to get us back on track.
“I—”
“All Bellas please gather around the fire pit,” a producer’s voice said, ringing out across the garden and cutting me off. I swallowed down a groan and stood. Our conversation would have to wait.
Joining the others around the fire pit, I squeezed in next to Callum.
We were instructed by producers to sit with our partner at any kind of formal gathering.
I didn’t think our tense situation was cause for changing the rule.
It actually probably encouraged production to put us in close proximity for as long as possible to draw out the drama.
Settling in, I looked over at him. He was staring into the fire, lost in his own thoughts as he watched the flames. I kept looking at him until he turned his head to look back at me.
We stared at each other, each of us searching for clarity in the other’s eyes.
It made me oddly emotional, being close to him, and yet I couldn’t look away.
I couldn’t tear my eyes from his. I wanted to know what he was thinking.
I wanted to tell him I was sorry for being confused.
That I didn’t expect to feel any kind of way about James.
Mostly, though, I wanted to reassure him that I was still in the game with him. How I felt about the kiss didn’t matter. I needed to stay here as long as possible. I needed to carry on with our deal. That was more important to me than anything else.
But I couldn’t say any of that. Not here and not on camera.
Maybe Callum saw the raw emotion in my eyes, or maybe he was simply as exhausted as I was. Whatever the cause, he shifted ever so slightly closer to me.
“Pop—”
What he was going to say next was quickly drowned out by two loud voices coming from across the yard.
“Hello, Bellas!” they sang out in unison.
I looked over, and my stomach dropped.
Walking across the lawn were two new contestants.
Two female contestants.