Chapter 7
7
Minutes passed in silence. She wanted to get up, go jump in the shower. But several things stopped her. First, she wasn’t sure whether she was capable of walking after that intense orgasm. And second, and most terrifying, she wasn’t sure she could walk past Zach without jumping on him and begging him to fuck her pain and confusion away. Because the ache hadn’t abated. Not one little bit. Her insides still remained shredded, and her pussy felt just as empty without him. Her body was acting independently of her heart and head.
Slowly, heart thumping enough to drown her hearing, she rose onto her elbows and glanced down at the floor.
Zach lay on his back, his chest rising and falling in rapid breaths, his eyes squeezed shut.
Finally, he rolled upright. His face was taut with restrained emotion, his nostrils flaring wide as he breathed. The anguish and fierce arousal stamped so severely on his face made her breath catch. His eyes snapped open. Dark, turbulent orbs zeroed in on her, fixing her with that unwavering focus, which had never ceased to unnerve her since their first meeting.
“You will come back to me, Bethany.”
She shook her head fiercely, holding on to her pain and reminding herself why she couldn’t give in to his iron will. He didn’t love her. He loved someone else. A dead someone else.
“Yes, you will. I won’t stop trying until you do,” he continued harshly. “And then do you know what’s going to happen?”
The aggression in his voice sent a tremor of apprehension up her spine. “What are you going to do, Zach?” she dared him.
His teeth bared in a parody of a smile. “I’m going to punish you for what you’re doing to us. I’m going to fuck you raw for days. Until your vocal cords stop working from screaming for mercy. And you know what? I won’t stop. Because every day you keep us apart, every minute you maintain this distance, I get a little bit crazier, a little bit more out-of-my-fucking-head insane from craving you. And you will pay, Bethany. Dearly. Take a few minutes. Think about that, and assess how much you want this thing to drag on. I’m not going anywhere. Now, where’s your bathroom?”
“My bathroom?”
He looked down at his crotch and back at her, one wry eyebrow lifted. “I blew my load watching you finger fuck that tight, sweet cunt. I’m a fucking mess right now.”
There was no hint of embarrassment in his voice. Not a single shred of it. He rose off the floor with a litheness that was beautiful to watch. He took a step toward the bed and raked her naked body with those hot, lethal eyes of his. They burned even hotter when they rested between her legs. The evidence of her climax was pretty hard to miss. Hell, she was drenched with it.
“The cunt that belongs to me. That’s something else you’ll have to pay for, by the way. Bathroom?”
With a shaky hand, she pointed to the closed door to the left of her bedroom. He stepped back from the foot of her bed, his gaze still lingering on her sex. When his eyes finally rose to hers, the condemnation and hunger in the grey depths stopped her breath.
He whirled away, one hand spearing through his hair as he strode to the bathroom and shut the door behind him.
Bethany collapsed back onto the bed, her breath rushing in and out of her in huge, desperate gulps.
She’d wanted to make him suffer. And she had. But by taunting him with what he’d wanted most, she’d jerked the tail of the tiger. Zachary Savage knew he was in the wrong. He knew he had hurt her—continued to hurt her with his silence. A small part of her even admitted to admiring him for owning up to the fact that he had wronged her. But she had also used the most dangerous weapon of punishment she could think of, to show him how badly she was torn apart by the huge issue they grappled with.
How could she crave him like this when he might possibly have committed the most heinous of crimes?
She clasped her hands over her face and shuddered as she recalled him writhing on her floor. Hell, she’d reduced a proud and sexually dominant man to coming in his pants like a hormonal teenager.
A horrific little giggle escaped her throat. She clamped her mouth shut when she heard the door opening. He walked in as she was pulling the sheet over her body.
“The shower’s all yours,” he said. “When you slide that soap all over your hot little body, remember who it belongs to. And who will be claiming it again, very soon.”
He walked over and stared down at her. His eyes were inscrutable, as if he’d washed away every single expression when he’d used the bathroom.
Slowly, he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.
“Happy birthday, baby,” he murmured.
Then he walked out.
* * *
She slept heavy and dreamless through the night, not waking until her alarm blared at eight. Slamming her hand over it, she rolled over in bed and was immediately drenched in vivid memory.
God. What had she done? Heat raced up her neck and into her face as she recalled her brazen, incredibly dangerous behavior. A part of her remained stunned Zach hadn’t annihilated her. He’d been well beyond the boundaries of his endurance.
And for a man who craved sex as much as Zach did, to not take what was so temptingly and brazenly displayed in front of him… She shuddered as she recalled him losing it on her floor.
She’d tried to use sex to reach him once. Back in Marrakech, she’d thought the better of it. But last night, she’d been too far gone to think things through properly.
Did she regret it now?
She shut her eyes and admitted that guilt wasn’t paramount. But what she’d done had created a ticking time bomb of gnawing hunger in both of them.
You will pay… I will punish you…
As much as she tried to be affronted by that threat, she couldn’t deny that the thought of being punished severely by Zach made her insides turn over with scorching anticipation. No matter how many sexual toys she went through, Zach Savage’s brand of sex would always trump whatever she could come up with in the self-pleasure department.
Her phone rang, jerking her out of her heated daydreams.
“Hey B,” Keely greeted her with a tone much more subdued than her usual hyperactive briskness.
“Hey,” she replied, refusing to acknowledge that part of her had hoped for someone else, someone with a much deeper voice at the end of the line.
“I fucked up your birthday last night. I’m sorry.”
Bethany sighed. “It wasn’t all fucked up,” she replied. Her face flamed again as she remembered how the night had ended. She’d experienced a seriously intense orgasm, and she’d watched one of the most dynamic, sexiest men on the planet lose it on her bedroom floor. “At least now I know what a Fuck Me Blue tastes like.”
Keely laughed. “Yeah, we must go on a cocktail crawl one of these days. Minus one crazy stalker boyfriend, of course.”
A spurt of anger flared up. “He’s not a crazy stalker, Keely. He’s just…”
“Wants you really, really badly?” Contrite Keely was fast receding and Snarky Keely was reasserting herself.
Bethany gripped her phone harder. “I don’t know what he is. Besides, you told him where to find me, remember?”
“Sure, rub it in. But seriously, what are you going to do, B? I get the feeling he’s not going away.”
I don’t want him to . She closed her eyes and swallowed at the fierce power behind the thought. “He wants me to give him an hour. To talk.”
“Maybe you should consider that.”
“What if he just weaves words around me without really telling me what I need to know?”
“You need to ask yourself what’s important to you. Being with him regardless of whether you know about his past or not. Do you think he’ll tell you eventually, when he’s ready?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.” Bethany frowned as her memory tweaked. “Last night, he said something about if he had a choice he would tell me.”
“When last night?” Keely asked sharply.
“I… he followed me home,” she said, then rushed on before Keely could speak. “He wanted to make sure I got home safely. He knew we’d been drinking.”
“Right. Okay. So you think he’s not divulging his past because something—or someone’s—holding him back?”
“I didn’t ask.”
Keely snorted. “Aunt Keely thinks you need to have that talk, baby girl. You’re running around in circles chasing your pretty little tail. You’re both beginning to drive me crazy. Sort yourself out, then call me. I have some juicy details of my hookup from last night.”
Bethany laughed. “You hooked up with someone last night?”
“Of course. After you deserted me, I needed to drown my sorrows. The right guy came along, and I went with the flow.” A noise echoed down the line, followed by a loud crash. Keely laughed under her breath. “Gotta go. My date is trying to escape his leash.”
“Jesus, Keely!”
“Shut up. Don’t judge until you try. Oh hey, there’s an idea. You can tie Savage to a sturdy post and threaten not to release him until he tells you all his secrets. I can come up with a few?—”
“No, thanks,” she interjected quickly.
Keely sighed. “You’re no fun.”
Bethany stretched and eyed the clock. She needed to get up. Her parents would be arriving within the hour. “Heads up before you go, I’m going back to work tomorrow, so no more texts to Sheena.”
Not just for the sake of earning a paycheck; she needed the distraction of work to keep her from losing her mind. Or worse, considering what Zach had suggested last night, that they put the landmine subject of his wife’s death to one side and carry on regardless.
“You sure?” Concern lined Keely’s voice, reminding Bethany what a mess she’d been for the last week.
And what a mess she still felt inside.
She sucked in a breath. “I can’t quit my job, Keel. And I can’t keep hiding in my bedroom hoping everything will right itself.”
“Okay. Dinner and drinks on Wednesday?”
“Sure. I’ll call.”
She rang off and pushed back the sheets. Getting out of bed, she froze for a minute as the memory of Zach in her bedroom hit her full force.
In the light of day, she was even more staggered by his self-control. Had their positions been reversed, she doubted she could’ve stopped herself from leaping on him.
Their sexual chemistry hadn’t diminished one iota—hell, it was as fiery as ever. And yet he’d respected her wish and kept his distance.
No matter how much she wanted to hate him for keeping her out of the important parts of his life, Zach had a core of integrity that kept her from completely hating him.
If there really was a reason why he couldn’t talk about what had happened between him and Farrah, was she right in pushing him to tell her?
Confusion followed her into the shower and stalked her as she pulled on a pair of light blue capri pants and a white top. She shoved her feet into heeled wedges just as her doorbell rang.
She let her parents in and accepted a bouquet of flowers from her dad.
Professor Todd Green looked nothing like your typical professor. He favored descriptive T-shirts and loafers rather than tweed coats and bowties. Tall, with a full head of greying dark brown hair, he looked like an overgrown teenager.
“Happy birthday, sweetheart.” He kissed Bethany’s cheeks, then frowned down at her. “You’ve lost weight. Are you eating properly?” he asked.
“I’m fine, Dad.” She bent her head so he wouldn’t see the shadows lurking and hurried to escape into the kitchen. He followed and watched her arrange the flowers in a vase.
“Are you sure?”
“Leave her alone, Todd,” her mother said, waving him away. “How was Paris?”
“Umm, it was great. Lots of fun and… great food.” She sent a desperate prayer that the heat building at the back of her neck didn’t flare into her face.
Veering away from her parents’ prying eyes, she returned to the living room and took her time positioning the flowers on her coffee table.
By the time her parents drifted back into the room, the smile she’d spent a few minutes practicing in front of the mirror was in place.
“So, Mom, I thought we’d hit a few art galleries around here? There’s a new one I think you’d like. Then we’ll go to lunch?” she said airily. Her mother was addicted to art galleries, especially ones featuring local artists.
“Sounds great. I’ve been meaning to find something for the guest bedroom. But it’s your birthday, sweetheart. Are you sure that’s what you want to do?”
Her father rolled his eyes over his wife’s head and made cutthroat signs at Bethany.
“It’s fine, Mom. I’m happy to.”
Felicity Green pursed her lips. “See, Todd. Not everyone thinks shopping for art is akin to catching the plague.”
Her father flinched. “I’m sure some in-depth research would prove otherwise, dear.”
This time Bethany’s smile felt less tight as she grabbed her purse and followed her parents out the door. It felt good to be semi-normal again, to bask in her parents’ easy banter and affection for each other. She didn’t miss her father’s concerned glances as they entered the elevator, but she carried on smiling, determined to put a brave face on her chaotic emotions.
A sense of déjà vu hit her the moment she crossed the foyer and exited into the sunshine.
The town car was back on the curb. Heart in her throat, she watched as Zach opened the back door and slowly stepped out.