I Love Her
EASTON
Mason lives on the third floor of a converted warehouse downtown, and I’ve been to this apartment maybe forty times, but I’ve never once stood outside the door this long before knocking.
It’s a Tuesday. I called ahead, which I’ve also never done.
I knock.
He opens the door in a T-shirt with a pencil behind his ear, because he’s always got a pencil somewhere, and he looks at me for a second, and whatever’s on my face makes his own go still.
“Come in.”
His place is all exposed brick and drafting tables—typical architect.
He clears a stack of drawings off the couch, and I sit. He takes the chair across from me, and neither of us reaches for the small talk we’d normally start with. He doesn’t offer me a drink, and for once, I don’t want one.
He understands me. He knows I’m not here for small talk, and this is no ordinary visit. And the look on his face forces the words down my throat, but they need to be said.
“I need to tell you some things,” I start. “And I need you to let me get through all of it before you say anything. Can you do that?”
He sits back and exhales.
“Out with it.” There’s an edge in his voice that’s not usually there, but I ignore it.
“I’m in love with Riley, and I’m not ready to let her go.” I pause. I watch his face, letting the words settle. I notice the tightness. But he doesn’t make a move and doesn’t say anything.
“I know you’ve never seen this part of me, and you’re worried about your sister and her well-being with me, but I promise, I’ll take care of her, Mase.
I wouldn’t hurt her. I know I’ve fucked up already.
Hiding the situation with Maya, not taking your advice until it was too late…
I was scared to lose her.” I finally admit the truth out loud.
I drag in a deep breath, and carefully watch him. He’s still seated, eyes fixed on me.
That’s a good sign. If Mason wanted me out, he’d have thrown me out the moment I mentioned her name. He’s willing to hear me out.
Something eases in me, and I continue.
“I was scared she’d run away. With Preston on her neck, the media spreading different headlines, and after being caught in public with me, another scandal involving me that could drag her further down into the mud was the last thing she needed.
And I didn’t want to scare her away. I wanted to be her safe space.
I thought I was. And when we agreed to fake dating…
it was because Preston showed up at my doorstep one time while I was away at practice.
I made it up, thinking it’d keep him away.
That he’d accept she’s moved on. So, we agreed to publicly display it.
And somehow, I found myself falling for her each passing day. ”
Mason is still quiet, and at this point, it’s beginning to unnerve me. It’s like he’s playing a game. Seeing how long I keep going. But I asked him to let me speak. So, he’s also granting my request.
“When you asked me to end things, I was going to do it. It was a difficult situation, but I knew you wanted the best for her, and you couldn’t trust me to give her that.
At first, I made peace with that realization.
I made a whole plan. I was going to go to Chicago, come home, and let her go.
Then, she flew to Chicago. She showed up in my jersey, and I knew that I was never going to be able to do it.
I was gonna call you when I got home. I was gonna tell you the truth and ask you for your blessing.
I had it all worked out on the flight back. ”
My voice cracks.
“That evening, I walked into an empty house. She’d left a note. And the next morning there was a photo of her and Preston with a ring on her hand, and I…” I stop to clear my throat. “I realized she’s made her choice. You. You’re more important to her, and she’s not wrong.”
My throat tightens again. “I’m sorry. Not for loving her. I’m not sorry for that; I can’t be. I’m sorry I kept it from you. You’ve known me longer than anyone, and you deserved better than that from me.”
I stop.
Mason looks at me for a long moment. Then he exhales slowly, and his shoulders visibly deflate. He leans forward with his elbows on his knees.
“You know what’s funny…” he says quietly. “I came into this ready to defend her from you. And I’ve been sitting here for ten minutes waiting for the guy I warned her about to show up, and he hasn’t. He’s just not in the room.”
He shakes his head. “You sound different, Easton.”
“Mason…”
“I believe you. All of it. I want you to know that.”
He rubs a hand over his jaw. “The confession alone. Going on record… I read about it, I understood what it cost you, and I knew before you sat down here that the guy who does that isn’t the guy who takes advantage of a woman with nowhere to go.”
Something loosens in my chest for the first time in two weeks. I feel lighter than I did when I walked in.
“So the answer’s yes?” I ask, almost too enthusiastically. “You’ll—”
“I never told her to leave.”
I stop.
“What?”
“You really thought I got to her?” His brow knits together. “That I called her and told her it was for the best?”
He stares at me. “Easton, I never called her. I never spoke to her about you after that dinner. I wouldn't have.”
A beat passes. “I assumed she left on her own.”
Suddenly, my heart rate picks up.
It wasn’t Mason? She left… on her own?
“Then why did she go?”
If Mason didn’t, then…
“Preston,” I say. But I’m already arguing with myself before it’s out. “No. That doesn’t make sense. Her father blew the engagement a week later, in public. She’s not with him. She’s not with anybody. She just…”
Left.
She just left me.
“She told you it was fake,” I say slowly. “At the restaurant. She looked right at you and said it was fake, and I didn’t correct her, because I thought—” My jaw works. “I thought she was protecting me. I’ve been telling myself for two weeks that she said it to protect me.”
Mason doesn’t answer.
“But maybe it was just true,” I say. “For her. Maybe I’m the only one who forgot it was supposed to be a lie.”
But she promised to stay. To never leave.
I can still hear her voice from that hotel room in Chicago. She promised. Said the words. She told me she’d see me at home.
I stand up, walk to his window, and look at the street. My sight blurs out, and all I can see is back in the hotel room in Chicago. The morning I last saw her.
“I have to ask her,” I say, turning around. “I have to ask her, Mason. I can’t live in this. I need to hear her say it.”
“No.”
“What?”
He’s on his feet now.
“Not now,” he says sternly. “And I need you to actually hear me, because I’m not saying it as her brother. She’s just freshly out of a toxic relationship. She’s just claimed her freedom. Whatever you had going on, it was because of proximity. Give her time to settle into her life again.”
I don’t say anything, because he’s right and I hate that he’s right.
He steps closer.
“I’m not standing in the way forever,” he says, gentler now.
“If this is real, and I’m starting to think it might be, it’ll still be real in a few months, when she’s had a minute to find out who she is and what she wants in life.
I’ll buy the first round. I mean that.” He puts a hand on my shoulder. “But not today.”
I look at my oldest friend.
Every instinct I have is telling me to argue.
I nod. “However long it takes.”
Mason looks at me like he’s seeing a different version of me he’s not used to.
“Thank you.”
I leave a few minutes later.
I’m crushed.
I could ignore his words. Drive down to her parents’ home, demand to see her. But then I'd be no better than Preston. Or Donovan.
For now, I’ll let her be, but when I finally get her…
Lord knows I’ll never let her go.