Chapter 52 No
NO
Present day
“Did you let them fuck you? Were you a whore for that cop, is that why he’s so obsessed with you?
” Daddy’s voice echoed around the room. With his hands on my knees, forcing my legs apart, I couldn’t breathe.
Everything in my mind screamed for me to move, but my body didn’t respond.
I was paralyzed with fear. Why can’t I move my legs?
I choked back a sob, shaking my head furiously. “No, no please don’t do this, I will be good. I promise,” I cried. I wasn’t a whore for him. It wasn’t true. Dustin was different. They were all different.
Smack.
My cheek burned, and my jaw vibrated from the blow.
The slap did nothing to stop the panic from setting in; it only magnified my unease.
This can’t be happening again. No. No. No.
I couldn’t shut down fast enough; it was like everything in this situation was a repetitive action from years ago.
I was that little girl, just raped about to be raped again.
“No daddy, please don’t,” the plea left my trembling lips as he forced himself closer.
I shouldn’t have come here. Why did I come here?
Why did I trust that Daddy would fix me?
I was mistaken, thinking that Daddy would care enough accept my wrongs.
It all came crashing down in that moment, the way he was always there.
I was his favorite daughter, his only daughter, and he was going to rape me again.
At least in the past, I might have been groomed, but it was my choice to do it.
Now, he stripped me of that choice. I tried to push him away, my hands finally ready to obey my mind, but they felt so weighted.
My nails dug into his arms with as much of a shove as I could muster.
“You stupid girl,” His hatred of me was clear now.
I didn’t see it before, but I saw it. He wasn’t doing this for my benefit.
No, he was doing it for his own twisted sense of pleasure.
A surge of strength entered my body in that moment, and I shoved him off with all my might.
Run, Summer, run and don’t look back. I’m trying, Momma, please wait for me.
Midas’ weight slammed down into me as he choked me. My arms flailed wildly as I pulled at his tightening hands, but I couldn’t free myself.
“You stupid little bitch, you killed her.” Daddy’s voice had never held so much disgust, so much pain.
“K-killed h-her?” I forced out, who did I kill? My mind panicked at the situation. His knee forced between my legs again, and my vision blinked as he kept the iron hold around my throat.
“You stupid girl, you don’t even remember.” He let up on my throat just enough for me to suck in a large gulp of air, but in my fight for air, he forced himself closer to my center. His dick was inches away from me, and no matter how much I fought, he held the upper hand.
“You look just like her, ever since you were little, it was hell trying to deny it, but you are just like her.”
“Wh-what are you t-talking about?” I forced it out.
My vision blurred as his hands crushed my windpipe.
I kept blinking, trying to clear away the spots clouding my vision.
My arms shoved aside, the weighted, useless limbs couldn’t hold against him.
Tears streamed down my face as something broke within me.
Fight him! I screamed in my mind, but the words didn’t stick.
I could feel his length as it slid against my pussy.
I felt disgusting; nausea rolled its way through me.
Daddy’s hand lifted just enough for me to suck in another ragged breath.
Barely enough energy to stay lucid. I inhaled as much air as I could before the crushing pressure was back.
It was a big mistake. I should have just let him kill me; instead, my will to live was used against me.
His dick slammed into me. I wailed my misery as he held my chin, forcing me to watch—
He stilled inside me. “Oh your so tight and wet for me.” He grunted as he withdrew a bit. I cried trying to breathe, to fight.
“You!”
Thrust.
“Killed!”
Thrust.
“Her!”
Thrust.
My insides screamed as his dick dragged across my walls.
The forced fucking was slamming me against the wooden armrest. He was too large for me to adjust; I couldn’t breathe.
I didn’t want to be wet for him, but my body didn’t understand the difference.
Too trained to enjoy pain, and relinquish to the brutality of others.
I was so ashamed. Hearing his rage, his hatred for me snapped something in my mind.
I couldn’t move any useless part of me despite how much I wanted to.
My vision started to fade. The lack of oxygen cradled me like an old friend as my mind dipped into blackness.
Twenty-four years ago
“My little sunshine, we have to go now.” Momma’s voice was sweet and soft as she whispered in my ear.
Waking up from my nap, I rubbed my eyes.
A big smile lit my face; we were going on an adventure after all.
I’d never been to Montana before. I heard there were these big giant trees and lots of wildlife in school.
Momma said we might even find Penny’s cousins up there.
I was so thrilled. I jumped into Momma’s open arms as she giggled, catching me.
“Momma, is it true that there are trees the size of the big buildings in the city?” I asked in wonder.
“Yes baby, trees so large they’d gobble you up!” She tickled my stomach and I escaped laughing. “Come with me, my sweet sunshine, Let’s get you packed and once we are done we will get some ice cream on the way!”
“Ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream!” I chanted as Momma caught me and carried me towards the big rooms.
“You remember our plan right? No one can know that we are going, not even Daddy.” Her big blue eyes looked at me with that soft smile, and I nodded.
“But won’t Daddy be coming with us?” I asked as I fiddled with the loose red bow on Penny’s soft pink fur.
“Yes baby, but not right now. We want to make sure we give Daddy time to finish work and be on his way, But you know who else is going to be there?” She smoothed my hair and poked me in the tummy.
“Who?” I asked with big eyes as she set me on the bed next to the open bag.
“Uncle Ryan. He already told me about this amazing zoo they have that he’s going to take you too, doesn’t that sound like fun?”
“Yes, can Penny come too?”
“Of course baby, she’s coming too. Maybe we will find her a friend at the zoo too.” Momma had turned toward her closet, grabbing clothes.
“Zoo! Zoo! Zoo!” I called out as I jumped up and down on the bed. Momma had started moving items around and setting shoeboxes on the bed.
“Be careful sweetie, we don’t need you falling off,” she reminded as she dug around in her closet. I jumped up and down with Penny clutched in my arms. I could almost reach the ceiling if I could just get a little higher. I bounced higher.
Up.
Up.
Up — my foot slipped on one of the boxes.
I gasped as I slid down off the side of the bed, taking the boxes with me.
“Whoops, Penny you should have been more careful,” I whispered into the toy’s ear as I got up from the spilled contents of the boxes.
Momma was still deep in the closet; she hadn’t heard the boxes fall, and I set Penny on top of the nightstand.
“Penny, you sit there while I clean up these boxes so Momma doesn’t put you in timeout for knocking it off the bed,” I disciplined the toy in the tone Momma would use.
Of course, the toy just sat there, but I could swear she was giving me a sassy look.
My tongue stuck out at her, returning the sass.
I collected the papers that had spilled out.
There were a lot of them, and they were heavy.
I couldn’t read those big words yet, but they looked official.
There was a box of pens that had slid off as well, and as I began picking them up, I came across a pen that had Momma’s name on one side.
Pretty swirling letters that are in her favorite green.
The pen was black with a rose on its casing, and Momma’s name made up the thorns; it was so pretty.
The cap was the top of the rose. I turned it in my hand, admiring it, and I took the cap off.
There was a golden rose underneath it. There was a button on the pen.
It was one of those fancy pens that I always wanted when we went shopping.
Momma had turned around now. The smile never felt my face as I readied to show her I found her special pen.
“Hey sunshi — ”
“Momma?”
My hand had pressed the pen’s button, and Momma looked down at me dazed. Her hand now on top of mine. Just as quickly, a smile appeared on her face.
“Momma?”
“Hey baby, let’s go ahead and get your night juice… I already poured it for you…It’s on the counter.” Her breath sounded strange, like she was having trouble breathing, but she kept her smile on her face.
“Okay Momma, I’ll go get it. I’m sorry Penny made a mess but I am glad we found your pen,” I went to walk out the door but then realized I forgot Penny.
Momma was clutching Penny in her hands, with an unwavering smile and optimism on her face. “Here you go baby, I love you.” She whispered the last words, leaning over to kiss me and hand me Penny.
“I love you Momma,” I took Penny and smiled, scolding the bunny for getting into paint again.
We made it all the way to the kitchen, and I took a large gulp of my juice.
It tasted a little funny, but maybe Momma left it out of the fridge too long.
When I got down from the stool, I had dropped Penny.
There was a crash, or was that thunder? I felt really sleepy, and I barely dragged Penny along with me.
We made it to one of the living rooms before I had to sit down.
My eyes barely held open as Penny dangled from my hand.