5 Serenity
“You really want me to do that?”
I glare at Russell, who I’m used to seeing outside of the club. Like Emilio, another member, he works with my father sometimes as a guard. Dad got a security detail when he started doing controversial and high risk surgeries that made him just as many enemies as they did fans.
“Yes,” I tell him, watching Dad from the corner of my eye. He’s talking to a new patient, which really doesn’t require a guard, and I cornered Russell when I realized he’s on security detail today.
Russell is a character. He’s got cinnamon roll energy and a nice guy smile, but now that I spend my time at the club I know he’s got some dirty habits and he treats Anita like a damn queen. They get along well, something I didn’t predict when I told her to ask him to update her security system last year.
He works for a company that Emilio’s father owns, so I’ve seen the both of them along with several other private guards on rotation since Dad started here. He came out to Colorado with my sister before I moved out here, but I know the guards better than either of them. I’m chattier than they are and I care about who’s working with us.
Except at the club. I’m more reserved and uncomfortable there, and both Russell and Anita have commented on it.
“And Jo and Vinny are chill with it,” Russell presses, glaring at me.
Sighing, I dig out my cell phone. I asked my cousin three days ago about the auction idea, and in a very out-of-character move, it took her two days to respond. I don’t know if she forgot or just had to think about it, but Jo usually responds in a few hours if her response isn’t immediate. Scrolling through my phone I find the chat thread and show him the messages.
His brows draw together, reading the responses. “Well, okay, if she’s cool with it. I can run some updates to the system and get your servers set for the announcements.”
“Thanks,” I tell him, offering a smile that feels forced. I could just ask him at the club, but seeing him here is convenient.
“Oh, but one condition.”
“Shoot.”
Russell glances over my head, and I turn to follow his gaze. Remy is standing at the nurses station a few feet away, eyeing us with interest. He also had a thing for Anita at one time, and I happen to really hate him. “If that fucker applies, you let me know.”
I snort. “Oh, absolutely.”
Dad appears at the door, wishing his patient well, and I wave at Russell before quickly ducking away. If Dad catches me with some spare time he’ll talk my ear off, and I have things to do.
In the few days since my talk with Emeric, I’ve hustled to get to work on the auction idea. It”s not going to happen immediately since Jo told me they haven’t done an auction in over five years, but she told me where to look if I’m serious about the idea.
As long as I don’t go overboard, she gave me the okay to try this out. I can’t wait to rub it in Emeric’s face.
I grabbed my things from Dad’s office before I went to find Russell, and since Dad doesn’t have anything interesting scheduled today, there’s nothing for me to set up to stream. Now that I’m getting more immersed in the club it’s getting harder to find the time to do the streaming videos. They help Dad and are part of the reason he’s grown in popularity and often gets requested for surgeries, but it”s a lot of tedious work with very little thanks.
Blowing out a breath, I fast walk to the entrance and eye the parking garage. It’s not that long of a walk to the reserved section, and I should have enough time to pop into the bath before -
I grunt, slamming into someone face first. I got distracted with my game plan for the evening and stopped paying attention to where I was walking. I stumble back, two strong hands grasping my upper arms to keep me from twisting my ankle in these heels.
“Woah, didn’t think I’d see you here, baby.”
My gaze snaps up to Chad. He’s got a smirk on his face, rubbing my arms before he lets go. He’s dressed casually in a t-shirt and jeans, but there’s something sparkling in his eyes. When I glance at his chest there’s some logo on it, I think for medical equipment deliveries. I feel like I’ve seen deliveries with that label before, but they never come in through this entrance.
It takes me a moment to respond, forcing a smile on my face even though it’s really bizarre to see him way over here, and at a place where I work no less. “Oh… hello.”
Seeing people like Russell and Anita outside the club isn’t awkward. I knew them before I started managing Sins and Secrets and I have other relationships with them. But Chad was a member first, and it’s weird to see him out in a town as big as Denver.
His smirk sharpens, the corners of his mouth somehow lifting higher than before. “Off to the club?”
“Home,” I say, then wonder why I admitted it. He’s cute, but I really don’t know the guy. Even if he is an undercover creep, he’s not going to be able to do something dumb like attack me out in the open at a hospital of all things. I’m even more confident in my house, which is well guarded and the security system is one Russell backed. I know it’s good pretty much wherever I normally go.
If I go anywhere out of the norm, I like inviting someone along. I don’t do clubs really, except the one I’m begrudgingly managing, and I even invited Anita to a restaurant the last time I wanted a wine tasting.
“Ah. I’m on my way to pick my sister up from PT.”
I glance over my shoulder. Outside of the OR and the surgical floor I don’t really know much about this place. I know it’s a massive building here in south Denver, but I couldn’t tell you where the physical therapy department is off the top of my head. “That’s kind of you.”
“It sure is,” he says, and I turn back to find him grinning again. “You?”
“I’m headed out,” I say again, skirting around the fact that Dad works here. If he knew anything about who my Dad is he’d already know that’s why I’m here. I’m surprised he hasn’t connected the dots if he does deliveries here. But I don’t always walk with Dad, and we really don’t look that much alike. I take after my mom, which is both a blessing and a curse.
If he finds my answers dodgy, he doesn’t let on. If anything he doesn’t seem to really care. “Thought anymore about what I said to you, babe?”
“I haven’t,” I admit, shifting from foot to foot. I’m even more uncomfortable talking to him about this outside of the security of the club. “Technically you’re supposed to keep people’s identities a secret. You shouldn’t ask me anything about the club outside of it.”
He laughs. “Wow. A by-the-books girl, aren’t you?”
“I just think it’s good to know that you can follow the rules,” I tell him honestly, growing more uncomfortable. Chad is very attractive, but I don’t like the candid way he talks about things like it’s no big deal.
“I can follow the rules that make sense,” he replies with a shrug. “You’re the one who brought up the club.”
I guess I am. “Fine. But I need to get going-”
“Going in tonight,” he presses, raising a brow. It’s not my day to work, and the weekend is just around the corner so I need to do as much prep beforehand as I can before talking to Emeric.
His offer to teach me to pole dance floats through my head, but I shove it away just as quickly. It just sounds like a risky idea if I’m supposed to be working with Emeric and maintaining some sort of professionalism.
Plus, he gets on my last nerve sometimes. I can’t imagine that he’d be the type of teacher to stand back and not criticize you. Or at least not criticize me.
“Not tonight,” I tell Chad honestly, glancing at my phone. It’s just past four, so if he’s here for an on-time appointment I’m betting he’s now late.
“Well the next time you’re in I’d love to spend some time with you,” he continues, wiggling his eyebrows again. “I’d like to get to know you better.”
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Chad. I’m not looking for anything physical with the club. I’m just there to work.”
“Well, the right Dom can change your mind. Or maybe you need a Daddy to care for you.”
I frown. I know that’s some people’s kinks, but it isn’t mine. I have enough Daddy issues without throwing another one into the mix. I’ve never met a guy who made me want to lean into that kind of kink either. “No.”
“Then we’d work out well, because I’m definitely a Dom, and you’re such a cute little brat.”
I bristle. People talk like this at the club, I’ve heard it more than enough times. But no one talks to me like this and it’s throwing me for a loop. And I never let anyone talk to me like this in my day-to-day life, yet I’m listening to it now. Maybe the club is changing me.
It’s supposed to be sexy, right? I’m supposed to get all hot and bothered by an assertive man, but I’m not getting into it. “What makes you think that?”
“Before Sins I had a bunch of practice at other places,” he tells me, crossing his arms. “A buddy of mine got way into it with his girlfriend too. Unfortunately, she got mixed up with a guy that totally turned her against him, and that relationship fell apart.” He leans in a little closer, his eyes boring into mine. “You wouldn’t do something like that to me, would you, pup?”
I slowly blink at him. Pup?
“Be a good girl now and think about what I’ve said,” he continues, winking at me before he turns away. “I’ll be at the club again soon. I look forward to playing together, Serenity.”
He turns and walks off, leaving me confused and uncertain. I mentally check, but nothing about that exchange got me hot and bothered, just bothered.
It takes a few seconds, and he’s out of earshot by the time I realize, but Chad walked away towards the parking garage again instead of going inside. I guess that sister of his wasn’t actually in PT.
~~~
Emeric is busy when I get to the club. After bypassing Emilio who barely gave me a nod, I found myself going to the side of the stage, bag and all. He’s up there again, showing people different moves, and his fan club stands off to one side drooling as he helps a girl I recognize but can’t name.
When he spots me, there’s a brief pause before he beckons me forward. “Come on, class just started.”
I blanch, eyes widening as he gestures to a pole at the front of the stage. “Uh, no-”
But he’s already walking over, dusting his hands together. There’s powder there to help with his grip, and he’s once again shirtless. His low riding sweats tempt me to look down, but I won’t give him the satisfaction of watching me check out his body.
He stops right in front of me, holding my gaze for a beat before he reaches down and all but jerks my bag from my hands. “No more watching, Doe Eyes. Come on, you need to get your hands on some experience.”
It feels like there might be an underlying message there, but he’s already tugging on my arm to get me onstage. A few of the single women shoot me a look, but none of them are bold enough to walk over here. I’m technically in charge, just like Emeric, and mouthing off to me could get them in a lot more trouble than they bargained for.
At least I don’t need to put up with that.
Emeric keeps hold until we’re at the pole, and then he guides both my hands to grip it. His body shifts behind mine, planting my hands firmly on the pole, and I can feel the hard ridges of his body behind mine.
Oh god. This feels good, and that”s a bad sign.
Leaning forward, he shatters my concentration again. “Try to keep up. Let’s work off some stress.”
I turn to glare, but he’s already pacing the stage to his own pole. I glance down at the outfit I wore, a short skirt that’s got accent colors that match my shoes and a tight tank that looks nice when I’m standing but will flash everything if I get on this pole.
“Alright class,” Emeric says, his voice booming across the stage. There’s thirteen people up here including me and him, and we’re going to have to be extra careful. New people fall a lot.
New people being me.
“Let’s work on the combo I taught you last week,” he continues, pulling out a remote as the music clicks on. I didn’t realize we had something to control the sound system like that, and when he turns to grab the pole he winks at me. “Remember, be free. Embarrassment holds you back, but we’re all liberated here when we let our bodies go.”
His words bang around in my head before the music gets louder, and this is happening all too fast. I hear him counting off the beats in my head, watching the women and men up here prep to follow his lead. And I’m so far out of my element I don’t know what to do.
“It’s our loving manager Serenity’s first time up here, so let”s be nice and give her a hand!”
I glare at Emeric who smirks, and a smatter of scattered applause echoes in the room. I know the audience is nearly empty for these classes, and the various offbeat claps echo in the space around us.
“Okay all, let’s go!”
I watch as the group spins at varying heights, the different levels of experience obvious. Emeric circles the pole once with a lazy spin, hopping down to observe while the class continues on, the routine beginning with a painfully difficult looking upside down middle split.
Yeah, that’s not going to happen.
“Keep it up,” he calls, pacing over to me. I grip the pole like a lifeline, ready to bolt, before those hypnotic green eyes turn to me. “Don’t strangle it. Work with it. The pole helps you.”
“The pole is inanimate.”
“And it’s here to help you contort your body into whatever you desire.”
I scoff, but my voice sounds quieter with the music as he gets closer. “I can’t do that.”
“Yes you can.” He eyes me up and down, and I resist the urge to do the same. “Both hands on there now, grip it. Let me show you.”
Holding my breath, I expect him to go back to his pole and give an example. Or maybe show me right here. Instead he shifts around behind me again, grasping my hands with his, and his voice is back in my ear. “Go with it.”
I gasp loudly when his hips subtly rock into mine. There’s no bulge like what Chad shoved me into my behind the other day, and I’m almost disappointed. “Good. Your ass pops naturally. Now gently rock your hips into the pole. Feet wide.”
“W-what?”
“Like I said,” he repeats, his voice a growl in my ear. “Rock those hips for me. Or I’m pressing mine to yours to show you how it’s done.”
I squeal, and shove that mental image away before my mind can run away from me. I rock my hips forward in a shallow motion.
His hands leave mine, finding my hips, and I take a shaky breath. “Good. More confidence. You want to look and feel self-assured when you do that. Know that you’re a damn sex kitten, Serenity. Rock harder. Grind on the pole.”
Embarrassment clouds my mind, but I let my body do the talking. His hands subtly move my hips forward, and I follow the flow of his movements until I gasp. My pussy is swollen and I feel needy as he helps grind me into the pole.
That’s a new one for me. I’m so used to associating sex with bad that I rarely get turned on, and it’s always been a downer for me.
“There you go now. Look how the audience drinks you up. You’d be such a pretty picture if you came just like this.”
I squeeze my eyes shut, letting my body follow his movements. My pussy continues to grind on the pole, causing me to gasp, and his voice is in my ear again.
“There’s a good girl. Legs wider. Pole dancing isn’t all about spinning. It’s about holding the audience captive. And I can tell you’re soaked.”
I moan, biting my cheek to suppress the noise, and he just chuckles. I don’t know why but the chuckle sends me over the edge, like he’s oh so pleased with himself for getting me this way. My hips become less rhythmic, more chaotic, and I’m almost panting as he holds me against the pole.
“There we are, Doe Eyes. Just a little more.”
I grip the pole harder, surprised that I can feel the orgasm edging close. I’m not doing much, but it has to be the combination of risk and performance as Emeric coaxes me.
“Good girl, Serenity. Let’s give them the finale.”
His grip on my hips hardens, and he pushes me roughly against the pole. My skirt is high, I can feel it barely touching my thighs, which means everyone is seeing up my skirt. He continues to grind me against the pole until I’m panting, my body starting to shake.
“Come on, give it to me. Show me you can make that little body cum.”
I bite my lip until I taste copper when I cum. I refuse to cry out in front of a room full of people as they watch me lose it while Emeric touches me. My hips slap against the pole, riding the high, and I keep gripping the pole the entire time, my knuckles white from how tight I hold.
When it begins to edge away, I hear his growl in my ear. “That’s my girl.”
Then the heat of his body leaves mine, and it slams me back into reality. Distantly I hear the music die down, and Emeric’s voice speaking loudly makes my eyes snap open.
There’s a handful of people right in front of the stage, eyes on me. One’s got his dick in his hand, another looks on with keen interest. They’re devouring me with their eyes.
I glance down and feel my cheeks flame. The pole is glistening when I shift my hips away, and it gives me just a moment to realize how exposed I am. My shaking hands fall from the pole, eyes wide as I realize what just happened.
Why did I let it happen?
“Good job,” Emeric says, and I turn my head slowly to see he’s talking to the class again. “We’re getting better at our lifts. Now on this next song we want to try grinding as part of our transitions…”
His voice trails to white noise for me. A few of the women up here look at me enviously, but the others who are partnered don’t even bat an eye in my direction. I stare as he goes over a new set of instructions, my body beginning to shake with the more downtime I have.
This can’t be happening.
He’s just starting to explain what he wants to see for the next song, and I let go of the pole as I step back. He keeps talking, but his eyes drift towards me, curiosity peppering his gaze.
I can’t do this. I’m not sure what made me do this, but he’s getting a sick sort of satisfaction watching me over here.
I give a stiff wave to the people watching me before I bolt. My skirt is still high on my thighs, and I tear at it to get it back in place. It doesn’t really matter though, not with the wetness in my thighs dripping like shame.
He doesn’t just get under my skin. He gets in my head. I can’t think of a single time I’ve had the urge to do something like that, and on a stage no less. He brings out something in me that’s absolutely terrifying.
I run back towards the office like a scared child, my legs wobbling in my heels. I couldn’t tell you if anyone shoots me a concerned look as I go or not, but the feeling of shame remains the same.
I never should’ve done that. Emeric makes me lose my thoughts, and apparently my damn mind. I can never go on that stage again, not if I plan to salvage my dignity.
Slamming the upstairs door to the office shut barely gives me a barrier between me and the disaster downstairs. Embarrassment rocks through my head, making me question everything that just happened downstairs.
I’m not that girl. I’m not a confident on-stage type of person, and certainly not in a sex club of all places. People watched me…
Pressing my hands to my face, I turn and drop my head to the desk, nearly missing the chair. I don’t often come undone like that, and the shameful resentment that crawls into my mind makes me hate myself.
Other people can do that. Partnered people, people with confidence and sex appeal. People who embrace their sexual powers and don’t let others” judgment get in the way of their fun.
But I’m not that person. I’ve never claimed to be.
I stay like that for several minutes, letting the self loathing overtake my brain, and silently berate myself for what happened. I need to be better.
Safe. Pure. If I don’t give up my power, no one can truly take it from me. I refuse to be -
The door opens, and I squeak. Maybe more time passed than I realized, but Emeric’s classes aren’t that long. He paces into the room, closing the door in his wake, and raises a brow at me. “Are you crying?”
I sit up, wondering why I decided to glare at the door like it was going to help me, and swipe at my cheek. My fingers come away wet, and I hadn’t realized that I let my emotions get the best of me. Usually I can mask it better than that.
“It’s nothing,” I grumble, squeezing my thighs together. The desk is in the way of him seeing anything, not that he’s trying to take a peek. He walks across the space to his desk, giving me a curious look as he goes before falling into his chair. “Just… overwhelmed.”
He tilts his head as the chair tilts back, curiosity sparkling in his gaze. “From downstairs?”
My cheeks heat. “Yes, from downstairs.”
Amusement flickers across his face, and I wake to slap him for it. “What’s wrong, Doe Eyes? Is it because it didn’t take much to get you off? Tell me, was it because of the stage, or because it’s my fault?”
I glance away. “I don’t know what you’re implying.”
He’s up from his chair in an instant, and I want to shrink away from his hulking form. Emeric isn’t bulky per say, but his body is definitely built for his job. He’s thrown on a shirt since coming upstairs, but that doesn’t help me forget his ripped abs underneath. The muscles in his arm bulge when he leans over me. “I’m talking about the way you shook when you came on that pole, beautiful. Don’t pretend like you don’t remember.”
I clear my throat awkwardly, pushing to stand. He lets me without a word, those startling green eyes staying fixed on me. “I - I remember.”
Emeric raises an eyebrow. “Then why are you acting weird?”
“I’m not.”
He leans back so he’s no longer crowding my space, but there’s no place to run behind the desk. The door is on the other side of the room behind him, and I’m debating hopping over the desk to get out of here. But it just reminds me of my skirt, and I fist each side of the fabric.
Emeric frowns the longer I stay silent. “Serenity, relax. I didn’t mean anything by it downstairs. That’s the first time I’ve seen you let loose at the club. This place is supposed to be a freeing atmosphere, not someplace that judges you. No one is holding a single moment against you.”
I scowl, keeping my hold on each side of my skirt like it makes a difference. “They all saw… that.”
His brows lift. “That? You can’t even say cum and not look pained?”
“Shut up, Emeric.”
It’s a weak response, and he presses his lips together instead of making another dig. “No one downstairs is judging you. You know that, right? It’s pretty common to go with your kinks here. Members do it all the time.”
“I don’t need a lesson,” I growl, but my voice is low and pained.
“Then stop acting like you’ve never had an orgasm before.”
I scowl. “I’ve absolutely had an orgasm before!”
Just not one like that. Not a knee shaking, mind shattering experience that made me lose all rational thought for a short few moments. If I wasn’t so self conscious I could’ve dragged out the feeling, and maybe I could’ve gotten Emeric to help me along to another one.
My cheeks burn at the thought. The very last thing I need to do is ask him for anything else.
Emeric is still watching me, and part of me wants to curl away from his attention. “You should come to another class sometime.”
“Ha!” I can’t help laughing at the idea. “Why would I do that?”
“Because you need to let yourself go sometimes, and you can’t do that when your brain is turned on. You think too much.”
“I don’t think I’ll be baring my ass on a pole again,” I grumble.
“Too bad, you looked damn good up there. No one was complaining.”
I blush. That’s scarily close to a compliment. “It’s still not really my thing.”
He shrugs. “Suit yourself. But the offer is still there. To be honest, Doe Eyes, I’d love to teach you how to strip on a pole.”