Chapter 23
Chapter Twenty-Three
Something had been different last night, and Addison couldn’t quite put a finger on it. Walker had been different. And she knew that she was right about that when she had woken up in the morning to find that he was still there. That he was holding her.
Even now, it made her shiver, and it had been hours.
She had gone into town, tried to get some work done, had gone to her vacation rental, which was empty, and had perused the place, because it had been a while since she had been there in person.
She imagined setting up her new life there, and she just felt sad.
Last night had been like playing house, that was the thing. She had made him dinner, they’d had incredible sex, they’d spent the night in his bed, like maybe it could be their bed.
And part of her just... wanted that.
It just felt like a terrible thing, because she knew that she couldn’t have it.
She knew that it was a silly thing even to think. But still, part of her just... ached for it.
It was insane, because she’d been with Alan for years before they had even gotten engaged, and she was ready to just devote her whole life to Walker.
Maybe that was a normal thing, when somebody was part of such a big sea change in your life. When another person brought you to all these realizations about yourself.
When another person made you a much better version of yourself.
Except that didn’t sound like something fleeting. That sounded like something real.
Very, very real.
So it was the substance of who she was now. Part of who she was becoming. And that didn’t feel like a fling or a rebound or just sex.
They’d never labeled it anything. They had just let it be. But now it felt like something that couldn’t just sit there.
Because if she let it sit there, it might get away.
She might lose it.
So when she got back to his house, she did a get ready with me to go on a dinner date, and posted it. Then hoped that he didn’t see it. Because it felt kind of cringe.
Also, she didn’t want him to see her before they went out.
So she was rewarded by his appreciative reaction to the dress, and she had to remind him that they had actually made a reservation.
“You made a reservation at Spurs?” he asked, sounding disgruntled.
“Well, yes. I don’t like to have to wait for a table when I’m hungry.”
“All right. Let’s get you fed so that you don’t bite a chunk out of me.”
It was so easy to imagine that this was something real. That it was something that could be her life. She was just so much happier. So much happier than she’d been with Alan, and yeah, the sex was a decent part of it, but there was more.
She could be sillier with Walker. She could be random, and just tell him whatever she was thinking, and he didn’t act like he needed to tell her what to do.
Or solve her problems, he just listened to her.
He treated her like she had a brain in her head, and she wouldn’t have said that Alan treated her like she was dumb, or like he needed to make sure he managed her reactions to everything, but being with someone who didn’t do that was just so different that it highlighted that behavior.
She was learning so many things that she would have hated to live with by being with a man who was everything she hadn’t known she wanted to live with, yet was, effortlessly.
Of course, there was an element of the unknown with Walker, too.
He was a man. It was like living with an entity that would always be somewhat unknowable, and she liked that.
She liked the contrast of a man. But they contrasted in the right ways.
She was still musing on that when they walked into Spurs, a big two-story building that was once the old saloon and dance hall.
The upstairs was a mezzanine floor that went all the way around the large dining room, and looked down on the stage and tables below.
The stage frequently still had performances on weekends, though this was a Wednesday night, so it was a little bit more relaxed.
So they sat down at their table, and she immediately started debating the merits of ribs with him.
“No,” he said. “Too much hassle for too little meat. I’d rather get brisket and drown it in barbecue sauce.”
“But the ribs are so juicy,” she said.
“And then you basically have to take a sink shower when you finish. And for what, Addison, I ask you.”
“I’m going to get the ribs to bug you.”
“I’m not going to be bothered, but I might have to lick your fingers clean.”
“I’m not sure that barbecue sauce lends itself to erotic play.” But she was smiling, and her face was getting hot.
“That sounds like a challenge, and you ought to know you don’t challenge me on things like this.”
“Walker, I’m not sure that—”
Walker looked up, eyes pinned on the door.
She looked over her shoulder, just in time to see Jill, her husband and kids, Alan, and Alan’s parents walk into the restaurant.
“Oh, no way.”
She turned her head away.
“We can go somewhere else,” Walker said.
“No, I don’t have to go somewhere else,” Addison said. “He created this situation, not me. And he was a douche last time we saw him, but none of that’s my fault, and it certainly isn’t your fault.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t know if I want to see how this is going to play out.”
“Nothing is going to happen. It’ll be just like when we saw Jill at La Befana. They’ll ignore us.”
And that might have happened, except when the waitress came over to take their drink order, she stopped, looked back at the table with Alan and his family, and then whipped her head back around to Walker and Addison.
“Oh, my God. You’re the bride. And he’s the guy that got roped.
And you’re the guy that did the roping,” she said, theatrically pointing to each of them and speaking loudly enough for everyone in the place to hear.
Addison froze.
“Sorry,” she said. “I just can’t believe it.”
That was when Alan seemed to not be able to pretend he didn’t see them anymore. He looked up, his eyes meeting Addison’s from the table.
Addison shook her head and looked away.
But the other diners were staring. And somebody walked over to their table and asked if they could take a selfie with Walker, who didn’t respond, and the person took a picture standing in front of him anyway.
And that was when Alan lost his temper. He stood up and walked over to the table, looked at Addison, and said, in a low, furious whisper, “I want to talk to you outside.”
“You don’t need to talk to her,” Walker said, standing up, drawing up to his full height, which was at least four inches taller than Alan.
“I do need to talk to her,” Alan said. “She was my fiancée only a month ago.”
“She’s not yours now,” Walker said, his voice feral.
Addison knew she had to separate them. “Yes, you can talk to me. Come on.” She walked quickly out the back door of the restaurant, and Alan followed her. But no sooner had the door closed behind the two of them than Walker was out there, too.
“It’s okay, Walker. I’ve got it.”
“You can have it with me here,” he said. There was something wild in Walker’s eyes, something she’d never seen before.
“You need to leave the restaurant,” Alan said. “I’m trying to celebrate my nephew’s birthday, and this whole circus is embarrassing my family.”
“I guess you shouldn’t have run away from your own wedding,” Walker said, “because from my perspective, you’re the embarrassment. And Addison and I are trying to have dinner.”
“You stay out of it,” Alan said. “If it weren’t for you and your dumb cowboy bullshit, it wouldn’t have turned into this. I can’t go anywhere without people doing that. I can’t go anywhere without people—”
“Calling you out for being the fucking coward that you are?” Walker said, stepping between Alan and Addison and squaring up with him.
Panic arced through Addison’s veins.
“You are nothing,” Walker growled. “You’re a coward.
And I’m glad that the whole town knows it.
Hell, I’m glad the whole world knows it, because men like you are so small and so insignificant.
Men like you, who waste the affection of a good woman, you are the kind of men that shouldn’t be allowed to go out in public.
Why should she carry the shame of your bullshit? ”
The rage that was emanating from Walker was so intense that Addison had a feeling this wasn’t only about her anymore.
There was something else. Another rage that was rising up inside of him, and all she knew was that she needed to do something to keep this from escalating into a fight, because if it became a fight, Walker was going to end up in prison.
“He’s not worth your time,” she said to Walker. But Alan didn’t seem to hear that, and neither did Walker.
“Don’t you have any pride?” Alan asked. “She rejected your ass once. Sure, maybe she wants to fuck you, but that’s all that it is.
It’s like your mom and dad all over again, don’t you think?
The way that your dad could have her whenever he wanted, but he’d never acknowledge her in public because of what she was. That’s all this is ever going to be.”
Walker lunged forward, and Alan retreated, back against the wall. She had never seen Walker this furious, because he was always unbothered. Always. But there was some kind of unraveling that had started last night.
It wasn’t anger then, it was something else.
This thing between them, spending the night together.
It was like whatever he normally used to cover up all the intensity, all the feelings, it was like that had quit functioning.
And this was him. Unbridled, uncontrolled.
Whether that was giving her three orgasms in a row with just his mouth, or being ready to kill her ex with his bare hands for speaking on her name.
That was when she knew. Standing right there in the back alley of the Spurs barbecue restaurant, that she loved Walker Grayson with all of her heart.
That she loved absolutely everything about this man. And always would. But she really didn’t want him to go to prison.