7. Chapter 7
Chapter 7
Ryan
I grabbed my chair out of the back of my car and headed towards the fields. I was looking forward to seeing my friend and watching Tyler play, but I was mostly looking forward to spending time with Jenna.
I realized that I had developed a crush on her, but I also knew that I would never act on it. I figured that there was no harm in spending time with her.
I walked into the park, waved to my friend, and then went and took my place next to Jenna. She immediately put her book away and smiled at me. It was good to know that she was truly happy that I was there, rather than simply putting up with me.
“Hello,” I said, settling into my chair.
“Hello,” she responded. “How have you been these past couple of hours?”
I could hear a bit of a flirtatious tone in her voice, and I loved it.
“It’s been life-changing,” I answered, trying to keep a straight face. “I think it may possibly be world-changing.”
Jenna laughed. “Excellent. I’ll be watching the news for updates.”
“Is he playing second again tonight?” I asked, watching the team finish their warmups in the field.
Jenna nodded. “Yes. He’s been working on pitching, but Coach told him he needs to get a bit more speed on his throws before he will have him pitch in a game.”
“That makes sense,” I said. “Some of that speed will naturally come as he gets older, but there’s things that he can work on even now to make sure he is getting the most out of his throws. The main thing that he needs to keep in mind is to make sure that he is using his legs, and make sure that he gets a complete follow through.”
“Great advice! I’ll pass that along to him,” Jenna said. “I know how to teach him middle infield, but I don’t know how to help him with pitching. I pitched a bit when I was younger, but the mechanics for pitching in softball are much different than the mechanics for pitching a baseball.”
“Any time. You know, if you want, and if he’s interested, I could go out and work with him sometime,” I offered.
Jenna looked surprised. “You would be willing to do that?”
“Sure, why not?” I asked.
“I guess it just seemed to me that you didn’t like to talk too much about the intricacies of the game. I mean, you’re obviously willing to be around it, but whenever the conversation gets too specific you tend to shy away,” she said, simply.
I knew that she was right. I looked at her for a minute, trying to decide if I could trust her with the truth. She made eye contact with me and gave me a slight smile, and I knew that I was safe.
“You’re right,” I said, taking a deep breath. “I don’t know how much I told you about my baseball experience.”
“Only that you played center field for Penn State, and that an injury ended your career,” she answered. “And that’s all I really know. I have seen the memorabilia in your office, but I haven’t examined it closely.”
I nodded. “Yeah, that’s the basics of where I played. I played all growing up, and I started at the varsity level all four years in high school.”
“So you were always good?” she asked, simply.
“Yes,” I replied. I knew it was pointless to deny it. “There were a few major league teams that were interested in me right out of high school, but I had better offers from colleges and I decided to go to Penn State. I was expected to enter the Major League draft my junior year, and there was a lot of talk that I would be chosen pretty quickly. Unfortunately I blew out my knee, and it all ended.”
“Heartbreaking,” Jenna said, gently placing her hand on my arm. “I am so sorry.”
“Thank you,” I said, looking out at the field and willing away the tears that were trying to form in my eyes. I was so touched by her kindness and genuine sympathy.
“And so that was it?” she asked. “You never wanted to coach or be around it or anything?”
I shook my head. “No, not really. I mean, I don’t have children, so it’s not like I’ve been around little league or anything. And I am so busy with the agency that I wouldn’t be able to commit to a high school team. And also, it just hurts to talk about sometimes, you know?”
Jenna nodded. “That makes sense,” she said. “I mean, I can’t say that I know exactly how you feel, but I can imagine that it can be tough.”
“Yes, that’s exactly it. It’s just tough to relive those memories. I have worked through it and I am much better than I used to be, but every once in a while it just gets to me.”
“But you would still be willing to work with Tyler?” Jenna asked.
“Yes,” I said. “I would be happy to.”
“That wouldn’t be too difficult? I don’t want you to put yourself into a situation that you are going to regret.”
I shook my head. “No, the more I think about it the more I think it would be great. And it could possibly be what I need to help heal from everything. It will feel as if all of my experiences were not for nothing, as I will be able to use what I know to help someone else. And Tyler is such a great kid, I’d be more than happy to work with him.”
Jenna turned and looked at me, giving me a sweet smile. “I am so glad that you think he’s a great kid. Of course I am pretty fond of him myself. And I think you may be right that helping someone else will help you. But please be honest with me and let me know if it’s not good for you, okay?”
“I promise,” I said, touched by her concern. I thought back to how she had defended me at the office earlier that day, and I realized that she was a truly caring person, and protective as well.
“Are you this protective of everyone?” I asked.
“What?” she said, startled. “You think I’m protective?”
“Yes,” I responded, simply. “I know you’re protective. I see it in the way you are with Tyler, obviously, but also in the way you are with me. And even with how you handled those two people at the office today. You didn’t just stop them from talking. You gave them information that would help them in their lives. You were looking out for them as you were reprimanding them.”
“I have never really thought about it before, but you’re right,” she said. “I guess I am pretty protective.”
“Have you always been this way?”
I was curious to know where it came from. Physically she was not at all intimidating, but I could see that she was a force to be reckoned with.
She looked at me for a minute before answering, and I figured she was trying to decide if she could trust me. I felt relieved once she started speaking.
“No,” she said, quietly. “I haven’t always been this way. I mean, I guess I have always been kind and always looked out for people, but I never felt the urge to protect people like I do now. I used to be very naive and didn’t think there was much danger in the world, and so I didn’t think that there was much that I needed to protect people from. But that all changed, and so now I am the way that I am.”
“Can I ask what changed it? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to .”
“I don’t mind. I guess it changed the day that my now ex-husband walked out on me. It took me by such surprise. The night before I had told him that I was expecting Tyler, and the next day he up and left. He cleared out the bank accounts, packed everything up, and that was it.”
Jenna shrugged her shoulders as if trying to imply that it didn’t bother her, but I could see in her eyes that it was painful for her to think about.
“Oh, Jenna. I’m so sorry,” I said. “I had no idea.”
Jenna smiled. “You have nothing to apologize for. We’re just having a conversation.”
I shook my head, completely baffled by how her husband could have walked out on her like that. Everything that I had learned about her told me that she was an incredible woman, and I couldn't imagine not wanting to be married to her. I understood that some men had a difficult time accepting fatherhood, but I just didn’t understand how anyone would willingly walk away from her.
I didn’t know what to say. I wanted to tell her what I was really thinking, but I figured that it would have been too much and would have pushed way beyond the bounds of what was proper. Finally I decided to state the obvious.
“So that is what has made you so cautious and protective.”
“Yes,” she said. “It was a difficult time, but my parents live close and were very helpful, and I had some friends who really helped me out as well. Once Tyler came along, I knew that I had to be strong and figure everything out for him, and so I did,” she said, her eyes sparkling again and her expression joyful.
“He is lucky to have you as a mom,” I said.
‘I’m lucky to have him as a son,” she answered.
We both looked out at the field and watched the game. Although neither of us was talking, it wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable. It was as if we both knew that nothing more needed to be said at that moment.
I was glad to know more about her, and what I had just learned made me like her even more.
At that moment Tyler made a great play, and Jenna and I both jumped to our feet to cheer for him. He looked over and smiled, and Jenna grabbed my arm.
“Did you see that smile?” she asked. “He’s so happy!”
“I did,” I said. “And he should be! That was a great play.”
“It was,” she said, sitting back down into her chair. “But the greatest thing is that we worked on that exact play all last weekend. He was really having a hard time making the backhand grab, and so we practiced it over and over again until he felt completely comfortable with it. And it paid off tonight! I love that!”
“That’s awesome,” I said.
I sat in silence, completely in awe of her. She was such a good mother. I loved the fact that she was so committed to him that she would spend hours at the field, helping him perfect one skill. I knew that a lot of it came from the fact that she was a ballplayer herself and that she knew what she was talking about, but it also spoke volumes about how much she cared for her son.
Get a hold of yourself, I thought. You can’t go one step further down this road. She works for you, and she is not going to date you. You can be her friend, and you can care about her kid, but it has to stop there.
“Are you alright?” Jenna asked, breaking me out of my reverie.
“Yes,” I said. “Sorry, I was zoned out with my thoughts.”
“Anything you want to share?”
I shook my head. “No, nothing worth sharing. Just sorting some stuff out.”
“Got it,” Jenna said.
I knew that she wasn’t going to press me further, and I was grateful. The rest of the game went by quickly. Tyler had two good hits, and the team won again.
After the game Jenna and I stood and made casual conversation with the parents waiting for their sons. There were two moms who I recognized from the other game I had gone to. They had made a point of asking Jenna to introduce me, and I could sense that Jenna was embarrassed, although she complied.
I was polite and spoke briefly with the women, but I quickly moved on from the conversation.
Tyler came off the field and ran straight to Jenna, tightly wrapping his arms around her.
“Did you see, Mama? Did you see me do the play we worked on?” He asked, excitedly.
“I did, Bubba!” Jenna answered. “I am so proud of you. All of your hard work paid off!”
“Can we work more this weekend? I want to get even better!” Tyler asked.
“Of course,” Jenna said, smiling.
Tyler came up to me and shook my hand. “Hello, Sir,” he said.
“Hello, Tyler,” I answered. “That was a great game!”
“Thank you,” he said, smiling. “Thank you for coming to watch me play! And for taking us to get dessert!”
“You’re welcome,” I said. “I’m going to go talk to Coach for a little bit, and then we will go. Does that sound good?”
Tyler nodded. “That sounds great.”
Twenty minutes later we were settled into a booth at the local diner, looking at the dessert menus.
“What are you going to get, Tyler?” I asked.
“I think I’m going to get a chocolate milkshake. I was deciding between that and a chocolate sundae, but I think the shake is bigger!”
“That’s a good plan,” I said, impressed by his rationale. “I’m going to get a strawberry sundae. What about you, Jenna?”
“Apple pie, with ice cream,” she said. “It’s my favorite!”
The server came and took our order, and then I asked Tyler to tell me his thoughts on his game. I was impressed by how detailed his analysis was, and how much knowledge he had about the game.
When he finished sharing his thoughts I looked over at Jenna and she was beaming with pride.
“Wow,” I said. You really know your stuff!”
Tyler nodded. “This is my fourth year playing,” he said, his tone very serious.
I held back a smile. “Well, as long as you keep this level of commitment and interest in the game, you are going to become one amazing player. You’re already very good, and I can tell that you are going to get even better.”
“Thank you,” Tyler said. “I hope so.”
I looked over at Jenna and raised my eyebrows, silently asking her for permission to tell him about my plan of helping him work on his pitching. She nodded her head slightly and smiled.
“Well, your mom told me that you are also working on pitching,” I said. “Do you like pitching?”
Tyler nodded his head enthusiastically. “Yes,” he said. “I really like pitching. I just need to learn how to throw faster in order to be able to pitch in a game. I know that I will get there, but I really want to be a pitcher as soon as I can.”
“Well, if you are interested I can help you work on pitching,” I said.
“You can?” he asked. “But I thought you played center field.”
“That’s the position that I played when I was in college, but when I was going up and all through high school I was also a pitcher,” I explained.
“Oh! Why did you stop pitching? I thought that it was something that everyone wants to do.” Tyler was clearly confused.
“Well, when it came time for me to go to college I had to focus on what position I would want to play once I was there. College teams have players who don’t do anything other than pitch. And as much as I enjoyed pitching, I was better at center field, so that was where I focused my time.”
“Oh, cool. I didn’t know it worked that way. But you would help teach me how to pitch?” he asked.
I nodded. “Absolutely,” I said. “I would love to. I think it would be a lot of fun, and I know you would learn quickly. Your mom told me how much you worked on that play you made tonight. I know that if you spend some time working on pitching, you will be able to pitch in a game before you know it.”
“Can I, Mama?” Tyler asked, turning to Jenna. “Can I work on my pitching?”
“Of course you can,” Jenna said. “We will work it out.”
“Yay! Thank you,” Tyler said. He turned and faced me. “Sir, I don’t know what your name is.”
“My name is Ryan,” I said.
“Mr. Ryan?” Tyler repeated.
I shook my head. “You don’t need to call me Mr. Ryan. You may call me Ryan.”
Tyler’s eyes got wide. “But you’re a grownup and I am supposed to call all grownups Mister or Miss or Coach. I have never called a grownup by their real name.”
“Bubba, remember what Gramps taught you? That you always call a grown up by Mister or Miss or Coach until that grownup tells you that you can call them by their first name?” Jenna said.
“Oh yeah!” Tyler said. “I forgot about that! Probably because no grown up has ever told me that I can call them by their name before. Until now.”
He turned to look at me and I could see that he was nervous, but I knew that he was determined to call me by my first name.
“Okay, Ryan,” he said. “I will call you that.”
“Good,” I said, smiling. “I am glad we have that settled now.”
I looked at Jenna and before I could catch myself, I winked at her. She blushed and giggled, and I had to force myself to look away.
Thankfully the dessert came at that moment, and we all focused our attention on devouring our treats.
We walked out to the parking lot together, and before they left we decided that I would meet them at the park on Saturday morning so Tyler and I could work on pitching.
As I drove away I knew that I was already counting down to Saturday.