8. Brooke
brOOKE
“You have to do it.”
“No, I don’t.”
“It’s a great opportunity.”
“I have a great opportunity right here.”
“It’s not the same, and you know it.”
“A degree is a degree. It doesn’t matter where I get it.”
“You’re really gonna keep arguing with me about this?”
“Looks that way.”
He laughed, low and soft, and the sound warmed my heart all the way to my toes. He had that effect on me. He always had. “You’ve been at it for days.”
“Yeah, but I’ve been making some excellent points.”
“I don’t know.” Brayden leaned against the tailgate of his old pickup and folded his arms across his chest. “You’ve repeated the same point about twelve times now.”
“Because you keep refusing to admit I’m right.”
“Because you’re not.” The corners of his mouth twitched. “You are stubborn, though. Very, very stubborn.”
“I am no such thing.”
“You are, and you’re hard-headed.”
“What?”
“You won’t listen to reason.”
“Because the reason is two hours away!”
“You say that like it’s days instead of a couple of hours.” He reached over and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “I can drive two hours day or night. No problem.”
“Every weekend?”
“If I have to.”
“That's four hours in a truck.”
“So… I like driving.”
“You hate driving.”
"I hate traffic. There’s a difference.”
“Gas is expensive.”
“You’re grasping for straws now,” he teased.
“I’m serious. You already work too much. I would hate for you to blow your money on…”
“Coming to see you wouldn’t be blowing my money, Brooke.”
“Doesn’t make it any less expensive.”
“I could sell some feet pics.”
“Bray… This isn’t funny.”
“I know.”
A light breeze stirred through the trees, carrying the smell of fresh-cut grass. We’d driven out to the lake after dinner, and the sun was just beginning to set. My acceptance letter sat folded in my purse, and the corner was poking out, like it was daring me to pick it up.
I was overcome with emotion as I whispered, “I don’t want to leave you.”
My words hung between us, making the air feel even heavier. He looked out across the water, watching the waves crash along the bank, and after a moment, he turned back to me and said, “You’re not leaving me.”
“It feels like I am.”
“No, you’re just going to finish what you started.” His voice was quiet but certain. “It’s what your parents want, and…”
“My parents can get over it.”
“This isn’t about them.”
“Then, what is it about?”
“You,” he answered. “This is something you’ve always wanted, and there’s no way I’m going to let you give up on your dream. You've worked too damn hard to walk away now.”
“I can find somewhere closer… I could do it online.”
“It isn’t the same.”
“I want to be here with you.”
His jaw flexed, and I thought I was getting through to him. And then, he hit me with the hardest punch yet. “I’m not going anywhere, Brooke. I’ll be here when you get done, and then, we can start our lives together without any regrets.”
He smiled, but there was sadness hiding behind it. This was going to be hard on him, too, but deep down, I knew he was right. I needed to do this. So, I let out a breath and said, “You promise you’ll wait for me?”
“Absolutely. Nothing could take me away.”
“I’m scared.”
He took my hand in his and inched a little closer. “I love you, Brooke.”
“I know, but…”
“I wasn’t done,” he interrupted. “I love you too damn much to let you throw away your dreams because you’re worried about me. You’re not going to lose me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I do.” I started to tear up when he said, “I’ll call every night, and I’ll come see you every chance I get. And you’ll come home on breaks, and we can even email. Whatever it takes.”
I nodded.
“We’ll figure it out.” He used the pad of his thumb to brush my tears away. “This thing we got… it isn’t gonna disappear because you’re at some school two hours away. We’re more than that.”
“You promise?”
“I promise.”
“And you’ll always answer when I call.”
“I still gotta work, but yeah, I’ll answer when I can.”
“And you’ll really visit?”
“Every chance I get.”
“You won’t forget me?”
“I couldn’t if I tried.” He leaned forward until his forehead rested against mine. “I love you… You’re my girl. No way, I’m going to ever forget you or what we have.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?” He leaned back. “That mean you’ll go?”
“Yeah, I’ll go.”
“You sure?”
“No.” I laughed, wiping more tears from my face. “But I’ll go.”
“That’s my girl.” He gave me a quick kiss before saying, “You’re gonna be one hell of a social worker someday.”
“You really think so?”
“I know so.”
He kept his word. We both did, in the beginning.
I could still remember how excited I would get when I saw his truck pull into my dorm parking lot and how my chest would tighten whenever I got one of his late-night phone calls that lasted until one of us fell asleep. And how I always smiled whenever I got one of his texts.
Then, things started to change.
It was subtle at first. A missed weekend because I had a big paper to write or a big test coming up. A phone call cut short because I had a study session, or he had to work late. We always said the right things, ‘I’ll call tomorrow and I love you’, but days became weeks.
Then, weeks became months.
Our calls became shorter, and our visits grew farther apart. And then, somewhere along the way, there was nothing left but silence. Just thinking about it was making my chest ache.
I was almost at the verge of tears when something smacked me hard against my shoulder, pulling me from my thoughts.
“Ow!” I complained.
“My bad.” Gloria tossed a new tennis ball into the air, catching it in her hand. “You were in another world… I had to do something to bring you back to reality.”
“What?”
“You’ve been standing there staring into space for the last five minutes.”
“Oh.” Heat crawled up my cheeks. “I’m sorry about that. I’ve just had a lot on my mind.”
Gloria’s smile faded. “You okay?”
The question caught me off guard.
I liked Gloria. She was a good friend who always listened when I had a problem with work, and she gave advice and looked out for me whenever she could. But this wasn’t work. And I was in no mood to share the sordid details of my love life.
I forced a smile as I said, “I’m fine. I just didn’t sleep much last night.”
“Work getting to you?”
“As always.”
“You have to learn to leave work at the office.”
“I wish it were that easy.”
“You’ll burn yourself out if you don’t.”
“I know. I know.”
I’d heard the same warnings from professors, supervisors, and just about every social worker who’d been working for more than a couple of weeks. Build boundaries. Protect your space.
It made sense in theory, but in reality, I couldn't stop wondering what happened after I left. The questions haunted me. Were they safe? Had they eaten dinner? Were they sleeping? Had someone hurt them? Were they hurting them now?
They came whether I invited them or not.
Gloria smiled. “Besides, you made real progress with Dylan this week.”
“I hope so.”
“You did.” She pointed her racket at me. “Figuring out that there was something going on with that Jimmy kid was huge. And then there was the mention of the basement…”
“Yeah, I know.”
A few days after our last home visit, I'd gotten a call from Dylan's middle school. He'd gotten into a fight with another student, and the principal wanted me there because he'd mentioned that something had gone on at home. She couldn’t get him to tell her what had happened, so she called me in.
By the time I arrived, he'd shut down again.
It had taken nearly an hour before I could get him talking again, and even then, it was like pulling teeth to get him to answer me. He finally admitted that Jimmy had been giving him a hard time, manipulating him to come over and hang out.
Jimmy had tempted him with snacks and video games, but it was clear Dylan didn’t want to go. But he wouldn’t tell me why. And any time I pushed, his eyes would drop to the floor. Eventually, he got to the point where he wouldn’t even speak, and I knew it was time to call it a day.
I ended the session and immediately called his mother to let her know what had taken place.
She promised to pass the information along to his counselor.
He’d earned Dylan’s trust much faster than I had, and I was hopeful that, with a little patience, Dylan would eventually divulge whatever secret he was trying so hard to keep.
“I just…” I sighed, “I just want to see him smile again, if that’s even possible.”
“It’s possible.” Gloria gave me a reassuring smile. “And that’s because he’s got you.”
“Until I get burned out and end up living under a bridge somewhere.”
“No, ma’am!” She laughed. “We can’t be having that.”
“I know. I’m trying.” She started walking toward the benches, and I fell in beside her. “Just gotta take it one day at a time.”
“Now, we’re talking.” She started putting her things in her bag. “What about your other cases? Anybody giving you a break?”
“Not exactly.”
“Uh-oh.”
“I got two more yesterday.”
“And?”
“And from what I’ve seen so far… that bridge is looking like prime real estate.”
“None of that, now. Whatever’s waiting on your desk can wait until Monday.”
“If only it worked that way.”
By the time we made it to the parking lot, I was ready to head home, but Gloria talked me into going across the street to grab a smoothie. I almost declined, but thankfully, I didn’t. Because if I had, I would’ve missed out on hearing about her disastrous attempt at online dating.
We made plans to play again in a couple of weeks, and instead of dreading it, I was actually looking forward to it. And for a little while, I almost forgot.
Almost.
We said our goodbyes, and I climbed into my SUV and started home.
The roads were quiet, which gave me way too much time to think.
I rolled the windows down and let in the warm breeze, hoping it would clear the fog in my head.
And then, I started thinking about all the things I needed to do over the weekend, hoping it would take my mind off things.
It didn’t.
One minute, I was thinking about the mountain of laundry I had to tackle, and I needed to meal prep for the week.