14. Brooke
brOOKE
This might’ve been wrong, but it couldn’t have felt more right.
When Ryan told me to figure out what I wanted, he’d given me a gift I didn’t even know I needed. He knew I was conflicted. He knew I still had feelings for Brayden and needed to figure things out. So, he gave me an out, but it felt like a door had closed between us.
Maybe he was trying to make this easier for both of us. It wasn't easy. Nothing about this was. But there was no denying it. The spark Brayden and I once had was still there and burning just as strongly as it did back then. One touch, and my whole body remembered everything about him.
The rough texture of his hand.
The feeling of his breath on my neck.
The way he'd always been able to unravel me with nothing more than a touch. It was time I faced the truth that I’d been running from for years. A part of me never stopped being Brayden’s, and that part of me had been waiting, without me even realizing it, for this exact moment.
He dropped his jeans and boxers to the floor, kicking them off along with his boots. I watched with anticipation as he rolled the condom on and eased back on top of me. He settled back between my legs, then slipped his hands under me and pulled me toward him.
I held my breath as I waited for him to lower his mouth to mine. Just before his lips touched mine, he paused. His dark eyes fell on me, searching for some kind of confirmation that this was what I truly wanted.
I understood his hesitation.
This was a lot.
On the one hand, my chest felt like a weight had been lifted. But on the other hand, I feared that too much time had passed, and we would never be able to get back to where we were. It was scary, but for him, I was willing to take the chance.
I gave him a soft smile, and that was all it took for him to crash his mouth against mine. The second our lips touched, I became consumed with emotion. I didn’t question it. I didn’t let my worries about tomorrow come between us. I wanted this. I wanted him.
He lowered his mouth to mine as his rough hands slid across my skin, sending goosebumps in their wake. I could feel his passion pouring into me as he deepened the kiss. His fingertips twisted into my hair as he raked his teeth across my bottom lip, nipping me lightly.
And just like that, I was hit with a whirlwind of heat and desire, and I had to hold on to him to keep myself from becoming lost in a lustful haze.
God, how I’d missed this. I’d missed him and the feeling of being in his arms. It was everything I’d imagined it would be and more. The more turned on I became, the more I imagined all the wicked things he could do to me.
His greedy hands on my body.
His lips on my neck.
His scent on my skin.
I couldn’t get enough.
A wanton groan slipped through my lips as I inched closer, pressing my body against his.
I’d never felt so consumed with need. He slid the head of his cock up and down, raking against me before he drove into me with one sudden, forceful thrust. I let out a soft whimper, and he immediately dropped his mouth to my ear. “Say my name.”
“Brayden.”
“Louder.”
“Brayden… Brayden… Brayden.”
“That’s right. I want you to remember who’s fucking you.”
He started to move, slow and deep, and God help me, I loved every second of it.
This wasn’t just making love. This was rough and full of all the passion we’d kept locked up for all these years, rushing out all at once.
With every forceful thrust of his hips, he reclaimed me, tarnishing me in a way that left no room for anyone else.
His broad, muscular chest raked across my breast with every rock forward. He grasped at the tuft of hair at the base of my neck, carefully tugging it as he drove into me again and again.
Without warning, he rolled to his back, carrying me with him, and within a blink, I was on top of him with my knees straddling his sides. I slowly lowered myself, taking him deep. I placed my hands on his chest and slowly began to move as I rocked my hips against him.
It felt incredible.
I wanted to savor the moment and let myself feel every sensation, but Brayden had other plans.
He placed his hands on my hips, guiding me to move faster.
Taking his cue, I quickened my pace, becoming more fervent and intense with each shift of my hips.
The muscles in my stomach began to tighten, and I knew it was coming.
With one last swerve of my hips, heat surged through me, consuming me as my orgasm tore through my body.
I pulsed around him, leaving no question that I’d found my release, but Brayden wasn’t done.
Instead, he lifted his hips, thrusting into me.
Our panting and moans echoed through the room as our bodies moved together.
Every drive of his hips, every swirl of mine, brought me closer and closer to a second orgasm.
My head thrashed back as I gasped, “Yes!”
He was focused and unrelenting as he kept driving into me, again and again. A low, deep growl echoed through the room as he found his own release, and his fingers dug into my hips, stilling me as he savored the moment.
Seconds later, I eased off of him, and he quickly tossed his condom in the trash. I lay down next to him, and he immediately rolled over on his side right next to me.
His eyes were fixed on mine as our breaths started to slow, and there was something about his expression that led me to ask, “You okay?”
A smile tugged at his lips as he said, “I was just about to ask you the same thing.”
“I’m good.” I nestled a little closer. “I’m more than good.”
“You should know something.”
“Okay…”
“Misunderstanding or not, I let you go once. It nearly broke me… I don’t have it in me to do it again.”
“I don’t have it in me either. But I’m going to need a little time to sort things out with Ryan.”
“And you’ve got it. All I’m asking is for a chance to spend as much time with you and my daughter as I possibly can.”
“Okay. I’m good with that.”
“Hope you mean that, because I’m gonna want to see you both a lot. We lost a lot of years, only to find out that life got in the way. I’m not going to let that happen again.”
“I won’t either.”
I rested my head down on the pillow and pulled up the covers as I curled up next to him. We lay there quietly for several minutes, and everything around us stilled. I was beginning to think Brayden had drifted off to sleep, until he asked, “You asleep?”
“No.”
“As much as I don’t want to, I think I should go.”
“Why? Ryan wouldn’t come back without telling me first.”
“Not worried about him.” He inched up on his elbow as he said, “I’m thinking about Anslee… I don’t think I should be here when she wakes up.”
“She’s just a baby.”
“Doesn’t matter. I don’t want to confuse her.” He sounded truly concerned as he said, “One minute I’m a complete stranger, playing blocks on the floor, and the next, I’m staying the night in her mother’s bed.”
“I understand, but you don’t have to leave.” I didn’t want him to go, so I said, “You can stay here, and when she gets up in the morning, you can slip out without her ever knowing you stayed.”
“You sure?”
“Positive.”
“Okay, but as soon as she’s up, I’m heading out.”
“Fair enough.” I let out a little giggle. “You’re going to be such a good daddy.”
“Daddy? Aw, hell. You’re killing me, woman.”
“Well, you are.”
“If you say so.” He leaned down, kissed me on the forehead, and said, “Get some sleep. I know how grumpy you can be when you don’t get enough sleep.”
“I’m not that grumpy.”
“Don’t even try denying it. Hell, I still remember that day you scared the hell out of that old lady trying to….”
“We do not need to rehash that story.”
“You sure? Because I remember it like it was yesterday.”
“I thought you said we were going to sleep.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” He settled back down on the mattress and let out a deep breath. “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too.”
With that, we both closed our eyes and let our exhaustion take over. It seemed like I’d barely closed my eyes when I felt Brayden’s lips against my cheek. I looked up to find him hovering over me with a smile. “Morning, beautiful.”
“What time is it?”
“A little after six.”
“Hmmmm,” I groaned with a stretch. “It’s so early.”
“Then, go back to sleep. I’ll call you in a couple of hours.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.” He kissed me once more, then turned and started out of the room. “Coffee’s brewing. Made it strong for Ms. Grumpy Pants.”
I reached over and grabbed a pillow, tossing it at him. “Not grumpy.”
“Sure you’re not,” he chuckled. “Catch ya later, beautiful.”
I started missing him the second he started down the hall, and I was tempted to call him back to bed.
Sadly, there was no point. I had to be up in twenty minutes to get ready for work, and he hadn’t wanted to be here when Anslee got up.
Seconds later, the front door opened and closed, and it wasn’t long before I heard his motorcycle roar to life.
I couldn’t fall back to sleep, so I spent the next twenty minutes staring at the ceiling, reliving every moment I’d shared with him.
The sexy curve of his lips when he smiled.
The spark in his eyes when he looked at me.
And most of all, the feel of his lips on mine. Every breath I took brought on another thought or memory, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
And I wasn’t so sure I wanted to. I liked the way I felt when I was with him. I liked who I was when I was with him. I’d never felt more like myself. I tried to hold onto that feeling when my alarm went off.
Brayden was right. I was grumpy when I didn’t get enough sleep, especially when I hadn’t slept well in days. I had too much to do to give in to the grumps, so I tried to shake it off and pulled myself out of bed.
My clothes were scattered about, so I quickly picked them up and tossed them in the laundry before making the bed. Time was getting away from me, so I rushed to the bathroom and took a hot shower. Once I’d dried off, I threw on one of my more comfortable work outfits and brushed my hair.
By the time I made my way across the hall to Anslee’s room, she was already awake and cooing in her bed. I lifted her out of the crib and gave her a quick kiss. “Good morning, sweet girl.”
Like me, she was a little quiet, and that was okay.
We all had our days. I got her dressed, packed her diaper bag, and wrestled her into her car seat while she protested every move I made.
I clearly wasn’t the only grumpy one in the family.
I had a feeling it wasn’t just the fact that we hadn’t slept well.
We were both still adjusting to doing our morning routines alone, and while she was still very young, she noticed. Ryan was the one who carried her out to the car while I carried our bags. He’d buckle her in while I tossed our things into the backseat.
The last couple of mornings, he hadn’t been there, and that wasn’t a complaint.
It was just a realization of how things would change.
I didn’t know what life would look like a month from now or who would be there in the morning, if anyone.
I just knew it would be different. Not just for me, but for her, too.
I dropped Anslee off at daycare, and my thoughts shifted to work. With Dylan and all my other cases suddenly bombarding my mind, I drove straight to the office. I’d barely made it through the door when Gloria started over to me with two coffees in her hands. “Running a little late this morning.”
“It’s been a morning.”
“Long night?”
“You have no idea.”
“Well, maybe this will help.” She handed me a cup before following me to my cubicle. “Daniel was asking for you. He’s in the office with Lisa.”
“Thanks. I’ll go check in with him.”
“Good luck.”
A few minutes later, we were in one of the agency vehicles heading across town for the follow-up walkthrough of Jimmy’s house. I told myself that this was just like any other home visit. I just needed to focus on the case, on documenting evidence, and doing my job.
I had no way of knowing that in a matter of minutes, I would be staring at a wall full of pictures that would change everything.