Smug Bastard

Chapter 1 Kinsley

“Think that’s everything.” Wiping the sweat from my brow, I slammed the door on the converted van and turned to face my best friend, Sadie, her natural hair wrapped up in a tight bun. Already at nine in the morning, the early sun beat down on us. While Sadie’s flawless black skin glowed under the heat, mine sweated like a pig, turning my face the color of one too. No matter the season, San Diego was always warm, making me miss having seasons.

“Are you sure about this, Kins?” Sadie folded her arms over her tank, her bare toes curling into the warm pavement. “You know traveling in America for a single woman is always on the top list as one of the most dangerous places. I looked that shit up. And you…” She motioned down my thin, athletic five-six frame. “Are the epitome of an attacker’s target audience.”

Tucking a strand of my long, dark hair behind my ear, I sighed. I had gone through this argument with Sadie, my parents, sister, and brother ten times already.

“I’ll be fine.” I reached out squeezing her arm. “I have pepper spray, kung-fu moves, and Goat.”

“Goat.” She burst out laughing. “You think Goat will do shit?” Sadie gave me a pointed look before strolling to the passenger-side window, the dog’s head hanging out of the window. She ran her fingers through his silky, white fur, scratching behind his ear, making his tongue roll out. “Yeah. So ferocious.” Goat melted into the seat as she rubbed his back. “Watch over her, boy. Don’t let anything happen to her, okay?”

I had found the dog behind our apartment building so hungry he was eating anything out of the dumpster to stay alive. At first Sadie was against him when I brought him in.

“Oh, hell no.” She put her hands on her hips, her head going back and forth. “We can’t have a dog.”

“But look at him.” Peering at her with pouty eyes, I rubbed his head, his emaciated, filthy body wrapped in a blanket, shaking with fear and fatigue.

“No, Kins. We don’t have time or the extra money for a dog. We’re graduating this year, and my time is filled with working or schoolwork. I don’t even have time to see Nathan,” she exclaimed.

She was right. My time was also taken up with trying to graduate and work part time as a waitress, but logic didn’t register when it came to seeing an animal in need.

“For tonight at least? I promise I’ll take him to a shelter tomorrow.” I continued to rub his head, the one place on him not completely covered with dirt, grime, and matted knots. Under the muck, I could tell he had white fur. He was scrawny from malnutrition, but his bone structure was somewhere between a small and medium dog, with long ears. Complete mutt and the sweetest face I had ever seen.

“Fine. Just tonight.” Sadie sighed. Kneeling on the floor next to him, she reached out, stroking his fur. With a tiny whimper, he nudged his head against her palm and licked her hand in a thank you.

I saw it happen. Her shoulders sagged, her heart melting all over the floor.

The battle was won.

Though Sadie fought it for a while, Goat never made it to the shelter, burrowing his way into our hearts. He was named because he continued to eat everything for months, including my thesis. It was clear he had been abused, and most likely by a man, seeing the way he growled and cowered from any male who entered our door. Her boyfriend, Nathan tried for six months, but so far Goat wouldn’t let him near him.

Maybe that was something else I bonded over with Goat. Not trusting males.

“Text and call me.” Sadie twisted to me, folding her arms. “And give your family hugs when you get back home.”

Home was North Kingston, a suburb outside of Providence, Rhode Island.

“Yes, Mom.”

She glared at me. “You could fly.”

“I’m not putting Goat in cargo. He already has anxiety issues. And you can’t take him.” Our graduation was only two weeks ago, and Sadie had already been offered a job in a top computer company, moving her to the San Francisco Bay Area in a few weeks. Our notice to leave our apartment was already in, and all my possessions, what little I had, were packed up in the camper van I had traded my car for. Our life here for the past four years was coming to an end.

We both knew Goat was really mine. She loved him but didn’t have time for a pet. Goat curled up on my bed every night, like he knew I needed his security and companionship more.

Sadie’s direction was set, while I floundered and wondered what I had spent the last four years doing. I had a business degree now but no clue what to do with it… if anything.

“I need to do this.” I tugged the keys out of my pocket. “We’ve been tied down for the last four years, and I have this craving to explore and see what’s out there.” I loved San Diego, but it was very vanilla, and something in me felt this dire need to find more, to really feel life.

“I get it, girl. Doesn’t mean I’m not nervous about you taking a road trip across the States alone.”

“I have barely two weeks before my brother’s wedding.” My brother, Kyle, was marrying his high school sweetheart, Amie, the two so perfect and still so in love it was disgusting to watch. “My sister is already angry I’m not coming right away. She has a million events and things she thinks I should be part of. She demands I be there four or five days before the event.”

I liked Amie, but if I had to attend a bachelorette-type event every day for the next two weeks, there would be murder and mayhem.

“Do not let your sister get to you. She always has a way of manipulating you.” Sadie pointed her finger at me. “Be strong.”

“Right.” I snorted. “Have you tried to ever say no to Kasey?” My brother and sister were twins, five years older than me, and were the golden pair in our hometown. They even had golden-brown hair like my mother, with huge hazel eyes like my father. I was literally the black sheep with my straight, dark brown hair and matching eyes, taking more after my father’s mother.

My parents thought they were done, happy with a boy and girl, when I came along. Surprise! Not that they didn’t love me to death, but I felt from birth I was not on the same road map as the rest of the Maxwell clan. My sister and brother were the cheerleader and jock, the A students, popular, beautiful, and overachievers. To come behind the great Maxwell twins was a bar I could never reach. Most teachers were at first gleeful in finding out who I was related to, until they discovered I was nothing like them. Average B student, I floated through school, more the introvert, with only two good friends. My extracurricular activities barely extended to the volleyball team, and I was far from the star in that. Actually, the whole team sucked.

“I better get going. I would like to make it to the Grand Canyon by tonight.” I opened my arms, hugging Sadie.

“Bitch, I’m going to miss you so much.” She squeezed me back, her voice thick.

“Don’t start.” I swallowed back my surge of emotion.

“It’s just strange. All this is ending.” She waved at the apartment we rented after living in the dorms. “You have been the only person I can tolerate for long periods of time. Even Nathan annoys me after a weekend.” She wiped her eyes. “Can’t believe we won’t ever live together again.”

“Please. I’ll probably be knocking on your door in San Francisco, begging to sleep on your sofa.”

“The place I rented is four hundred and eighty square feet. I won’t have a sofa.”

A laugh bubbled up my throat. I hugged her tighter before I stepped back.

“I want you to be careful, but have fun. Find a hot cowboy somewhere in Wyoming. Ride him until you forget about those other assholes.” Sadie nudged me. “Do not pick up your phone for Ethan; he doesn’t deserve shit from you. You’ll be seeing the other douche at the wedding, right?”

I cringed. “I hope not.” Both guys had worked hard at worming into my heart, and then when they did, they stomped, spit on, and burned it.

Jason, my high school crush, was the typical rich, popular, handsome jock you were warned about. I fought his attention for a long time before he broke me down into thinking he was actually a good guy. Basically, he won me over to take my virginity, dump me, and brag about his conquest the last few months of school to everyone. I wanted to get as far from him, the embarrassment, and town as I could, which landed me across the country in San Diego University.

It took me a long time to trust again, but Ethan was diligent, making me believe all guys weren’t like Jason. After five months, he finally convinced me. Two months ago, I found him having sex with a girl from our study group.

He had been calling and texting ever since, wanting me back, saying he was sorry, and it had “just happened.” Screw him. I was swearing off men. I had Goat, and he was the best companion a girl could ask for.

This road trip was about me. Figuring out my life.

Men were the last thing on my mind.