Chapter 6
Maya
The fire crackled in the hearth, casting dancing shadows across the living room walls.
We’d migrated from the couch to the floor at some point, spreading blankets and pillows in front of the fireplace like we were kids at a sleepover.
Except the tension humming between us was decidedly not kid-friendly.
Geoff had opened a bottle of wine that he still had in the gift bag.
“A gift from my mom. She’d want us to enjoy it,” he said at my puzzled glance.
Now we were on our second glass each. Not drunk, but definitely relaxed.
The kind of relaxed where filters started slipping and truths started spilling out.
“Okay, okay,” I said, gesturing with my wineglass in a way that was probably dangerous. “Most embarrassing gaming moment. Go.”
“Oh, not fair; you already know all my embarrassing moments.”
“I know the ones you’ve told me about. Come on, there has to be something you’ve kept secret.”
Geoff groaned, running a hand through the fur on his head. The gesture was endearing, somehow both human and distinctly not. “Fine. Remember that tournament last year? The one where I supposedly had internet issues during the finals?”
“Yeah, you dropped right in the middle of,” I stopped, realization dawning. “You didn’t have internet issues.”
“I panicked. Complete stage fright. Thousands of people were watching the livestream, and I froze. Closed the game and hid under my desk for twenty minutes.”
I stared at him. “You? Mister ‘Ice Cold Under Pressure’? You hid under your desk?”
“It seemed like a good idea at the time!”
I was laughing so hard I had to set my wineglass down before I spilled it. “Oh no. It’s all making sense. The forums were full of conspiracy theories. People thought you’d been DDoS’d.”
“I know. I felt terrible, but I couldn’t admit I had a panic attack.” He took a sip of his wine, ears twitching with embarrassment. “Your turn. Most embarrassing moment.”
I didn’t even have to think about what I was going to say. “I told you I loved you once.”
The words hung in the air between us. Geoff went still.
“I mean, not you specifically,” I said, my words coming out in a rush, heat flooding my face. “Or, well, yes, you specifically, but not. I mean, it was during that raid. The one where you saved me from the boss mechanic at the last second and I said, ‘oh my god I love you’ over voice chat.”
“I remember.” His voice remained neutral.
“Yeah, well. I played it off as a joke, but I was dying inside because I’d been having feelings for you for months at that point, and it just slipped out.
” I was talking too fast now, nervous energy spilling over.
“Tank messaged me after and asked if I was serious, and I panicked and said no, obviously not, we’re just friends, ha ha, but… ”
“Maya.”
I looked at him. He’d moved closer somehow, or maybe I had, because there were only inches between us now.
“I knew,” he said softly. “Or at least I hoped.”
My breath hitched. “What?”
“I knew, or hoped, you weren’t entirely joking. I could hear it in your voice. Maybe it was the way you said it, or the pause after. And I wanted so badly to say it back, but I was terrified of making things weird between us.”
My heart pounded. “When was this?”
“A year and a half ago. The dragon raid.”
“You’ve known for a year and a half?”
“I’ve had feelings for longer than that.
” He set his wineglass down, giving me his full attention.
“Maya, I started falling for you about six months after we met. Maybe sooner. It crept up on me. I’d look forward to you logging on, how my day felt incomplete if we didn’t talk, and the way your laugh made everything better. ”
I couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Same reason you didn’t. Fear.” His hand moved to rest on the blanket between us, close enough that I could feel his warmth.
“What we had was precious. I didn’t want to risk it.
And there were so many reasons it wouldn’t work, starting with the distance, the fact that you didn’t know what I was, the possibility that you’d never feel the same way. ”
“But I did. I do.” The words tumbled out, wine-loosened and honest. “Feel the same way, I mean. I’ve been half in love with you for over a year, and the only thing stopping me from being completely in love with you was the fear that you’d never feel the same way about me.”
“Maya.” Geoff’s eyes sparkled.
“And I know this is fast, and we just met in person yesterday, and there’s so much we need to figure out, but.” I broke off, emotions overwhelming me. “God, I've wanted to tell you for so long.”
Geoff’s hand covered mine, engulfing it completely. “Tell me now.”
“Tell you what?”
“Everything. All of it. No more hiding.”
I looked at our intertwined hands. His massive and fur-covered, mine small and pale against his, and felt the dam inside my chest break wide open.
“Okay. Okay, yes. I can do this.” I took a shaky breath.
“I love how you remember little things I mention in passing. How you send me memes online and text when you know I’m having a bad day.
How you’re patient with new players even when they mess up mechanics we’ve explained ten times.
I love your terrible puns and the way you laugh at my jokes even when they’re not that funny.
I love that you live up here in the mountains doing your own thing and don’t apologize for it. ”
I was crying now, tears sliding down my cheeks, but I couldn’t stop. The words I’d kept tucked away for so long tumbled out.
“I love that you disregarded your safety and went out in a blizzard to check on strangers. You carried me to safety without hesitation. That you made me hot chocolate and gave me your clothes and made me feel safe when I was terrified.” I squeezed his hand.
“I love that you see me, really see me, in ways no one else does. And the fact that you’re eight feet tall and covered in fur and technically a different species doesn’t change any of that.
If anything, it makes me love you more because you trusted me enough to let me see the real you. ”
“Maya.” My name was a broken sound in his throat. “I need to… Can I…?”
“Yes,” I said, not even knowing what he was asking. Just knowing my answer was yes to anything, everything, as long as it involved closing the distance between us.
He cupped my face with both hands, his touch impossibly gentle. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since you made that stupid joke about my username yesterday. Since before that. Since forever.”
“So kiss me.”
For a second, he just looked at me, like he was memorizing this moment, like he couldn’t quite believe it was real. Hell, I couldn’t believe it was happening. Then he leaned in, slow and careful, giving me every chance to pull away.
But I didn’t. I wanted this kiss more than anything.
His lips met mine, and the world narrowed to that single point of contact. He tasted like wine and something wilder, and his kiss was everything I’d imagined and nothing like I’d expected. Gentle at first, almost hesitant, like he was afraid of being too much, or too strong.
I made a sound - need or desire, or perhaps a combination of both, and his control slipped. Our kiss deepened, and I wound my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. My fingers tangled in the thick fur at his nape, softer than anything I’d ever touched.
When we finally broke apart, both breathing hard, he rested his forehead against mine. “Tell me this is happening. That it’s not all in my imagination or dreams.”
“It’s real.” I kissed him again, wanting to feel his lips against mine a second time. “Very real.”
“I should stop. We should stop.” But he didn’t move away. “You’ve been in an accident and you’re vulnerable. I don’t want to take advantage of you.”
“Geoff.” I pulled back enough to look him in the eyes. “I crashed my car yesterday, yes. But my brain is working fine. Nothing scrambled there. I know what I want. And I want you.”
“You’re sure?”
Instead of answering, I kissed him again. Deeper this time, with intent. My tongue found his, and he groaned, a low rumbling sound I felt through my whole body. In a swift motion as our tongues dueled, he pulled me into his lap.
Our size difference was immediately apparent. I felt tiny against him, surrounded by warmth and fur and strength. His hands spanned my waist easily, and when I shifted closer, I could feel the hard planes of his chest beneath the soft fur.
“Still sure?” he asked, voice rough.
“Getting more sure by the second.”
His laugh was breathless. “You’re going to kill me.”
“Promise?”
“Maya…” Whatever he was going to say was cut off as I kissed along his jaw, finding the spot where fur met skin at his throat. He shuddered, his grip on my waist tightening. “You don’t play fair.”
“What’s not fair?”
“You can’t…” He broke off with a groan as I did it again. “Sensitive. That’s a very sensitive spot.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“You’re enjoying this.”
“Oh, I am. Very much.” I pulled back to look at him, taking in his dilated pupils, the way his chest was rising and plunging. “Is this okay? Am I? Are we?”
“More than okay.” His thumb traced light circles on my hip, careful of the bruise; his touch electric even through my jeans. “I just want to make sure you’re comfortable. Size difference.”
“Is hot.”
He blinked. “What?”
“The size difference is hot, Geoff. You’re huge and strong, and you could probably break me in half, but you’re so careful with me. It’s incredibly attractive.”
“I would never hurt you.”
“I know. That’s part of what makes it hot.”
He stared at me for a long moment, something dark and heated in his expression. Then he was kissing me again, deeper than before, one hand sliding up my back while the other stayed locked on my hip. I melted into him, into the kiss, into the feeling of being surrounded by him.