Chapter Twenty-One #2
‘Heading back to London,’ said Lucy. ‘Accompanied by a minor Dutch royal who’s going to make him a superstar.’ She didn’t mention Sasha; that would only prompt further questions that she really didn’t want to answer.
‘Shitting hell,’ said Jonno. ‘I haven’t even started to get my head around what happened with all the singing stuff.’
‘I think it’s what the kids call “going viral”.’
‘Yeah, so I’m told. They were discussing him on Radio 2 earlier. He’s fucking everywhere. My kids haven’t stopped talking about him, and I’ve seen that clip of him singing George Michael about fifty times.’
‘I need to catch up on all that,’ said Lucy, shivering despite the hot water. ‘But I’m one of only eight people who heard it live.’
‘Was it as good as it comes across on the video?’
‘Yeah,’ mused Lucy. ‘He’s pretty amazing. Like, proper talent.’
‘Shame he’s such a personality vacuum.’
‘He actually grew on me,’ said Lucy vaguely. She tried to keep her voice light, knowing that Jonno would pounce on any suggestion that Lucy and Nate had inched closer to each other.
‘Oh really? Tell me more.’ Like that, thought Lucy.
‘No, not like that,’ she said quickly. ‘He’s just a lot more personable once you get to know him a bit.’
‘Christ. Being “personable” is really going to get the groupies flocking his way.’
‘Not everyone has your charisma,’ said Lucy with a smile. ‘He’s definitely not a natural megastar. I just hope he’s being looked after.’
‘I think Sasha has got involved,’ said Jonno. ‘No doubt protecting LUNA’s interests.’
‘Yeah, I saw her in Zermatt,’ said Lucy, gratified that Jonno wasn’t entirely in the dark. ‘She and Alex whisked him off through a crowd of waiting press.’
‘Who’s Alex?’
‘The minor Dutch royal. He’s now the mastermind of Nate’s superstardom. You need to follow him on TikTok.’
‘I’m too old for TikTok,’ grumbled Jonno. ‘I’ve been all over it for a few days, keeping an eye out for you, and it’s full of weirdos dancing or people mowing the lawn in a mindful way. You back in the office tomorrow?’
‘No, my flight’s not until half three. I’ll be back on Tuesday.’
‘Pint in the Brunel after work?’
‘Yeah, that would be great.’ The idea of getting back to some kind of Bristol normality felt appealing, but then also left Lucy feeling oddly hollow. Only the thought of seeing Nate again made her heart skip.
‘You’re OK though, right?’ Jonno sounded worried, which she couldn’t help but love him for.
‘I’m fine. The whole experience feels a bit surreal now. Like, I’m not sure if it actually happened.’
‘We’ll get you and French Exit to do an agency talk. I’m guessing it will be more interesting than that time when Derek talked about data protection.’
‘Ha, sure,’ said Lucy. ‘How was the Geneva Convention? Maya and Olly OK?’
‘Yeah,’ said Jonno. ‘A bit gutted to leave Zermatt, but the place Kristoff booked by the lake had a fancy spa, so they were pretty happy after that. We’ve done some planning for next year, and squeezed a bit more budget out of them.’
‘Good work,’ said Lucy. She tried to care about the work element of the weekend, but right now it was hard to muster much enthusiasm. ‘Right, I need to go,’ she said. ‘I’ve got food coming, and my water’s getting cold.’
‘I can’t believe you’re calling me naked. How am I supposed to get anything done?’
Lucy laughed. ‘Is your beautiful wife home?’
‘Yes. She’s watching TV while I cook her dinner.’
‘Then go and worship her. She deserves it.’
‘Fine. But I want you to know that it gets confusing sometimes.’
‘No, it doesn’t, you just like me to think it does.’
‘Yeah, you’re right. Who’s getting wanked off on WhatsApp this evening? Iron Manuel or Tentpole Tony?’
‘Neither,’ said Lucy emphatically. Under different circumstances, she’d definitely be putting in a video call to one of them, but today she didn’t feel like it.
Tiredness, partly, but also that strange feeling of emptiness that remote video masturbation definitely wasn’t going to fix.
Had it been there before Nate, or was it a new thing?
Everything felt too confusing right now.
‘How boring,’ said Jonno. ‘See you Tuesday, mate.’
Lucy said goodbye and ended the call, then scrubbed herself down with a tiny bottle of luxury body wash and wrapped herself in an obscenely fluffy bathrobe.
She applied a layer of fancy moisturiser from the hotel bathroom to her parched face, then curled up on the bed and opened TikTok.
A search for #natelambert yielded hundreds of videos – sharing Alex’s footage, reaction videos, analysis from people in the music industry, girls swooning about how he was the new Harry Styles.
The sheer volume of it made Lucy’s mind boggle, so instead she searched for @BaronAlexJansen and scrolled through Alex’s videos from the weekend.
By the time her food arrived she’d watched them all up to this morning, from Friday’s live video of Alex introducing everyone at the Gunterhütte, followed by another of him trying to wrestle with a sofa bed.
Then the edit of Nate’s singing, which was two full minutes of one goosebump moment after another.
There was the video of them eating her birthday ice cream, then an edit of highlights from Saturday’s snow digging.
Willem’s proposal was artfully edited with music and captions, then a few more videos showed Alex talking about the various challenges he’d faced during this ordeal, like he was a victim of a mountainside plane crash and would shortly be forced to eat his fellow passengers.
He’d just about managed humble and grateful, although Lucy could see how much he wanted to rage about the hardship and indignity of it all.
She sipped her wine and picked at her goat’s cheese salad as she ventured into the unknown of videos from today.
First there was Alex pushing through the crowds outside the hotel with Nate, providing a running commentary, then a short interview in the back of the car where Nate looked genuinely shellshocked about what had just happened.
Then their arrival at Geneva airport, where another gaggle of cameras and phones and microphones surged towards them.
Nate gave a short statement, saying he’d been blown away by all the attention and so grateful for all the messages he’d received, but his priority right now was getting home to his family.
He’d apparently started his own TikTok channel, so please follow @NateLambertMusic.
Lucy clicked on the link, but there were no videos yet.
Sasha didn’t appear in any of the videos, other than a glimpse of her dark hair in the front seat of the taxi to the airport.
Clearly she’d ordered Alex to leave her out of it, which was hardly surprising.
But Lucy knew she wouldn’t be far away, and was momentarily grateful that Nate was in the care of someone who knew and understood him.
Alex may be masterminding Operation Superstar, but Sasha’s priority would be looking out for Nate.
She paused on a shot of Nate smiling for a selfie with a girl in the airport, his hair flopping over one eye.
He was laughing at something, his eyes sparkling.
Shit, thought Lucy, putting her fork down on the barely touched salad and downing the rest of the wine. I really miss him, and it feels like I’ve totally messed this up.