Chapter Twenty-Six #2
‘Hey, baby,’ said Kristoff, putting his arm around her shoulders. ‘You had a nice day?’
‘Yeah, amazing,’ said Lucy, not taking her eyes off Nate.
He started with a George Michael medley, then segued into some Ed Sheeran crowd-pleasers that everyone sang along to.
The three of them picked their way down to the front to join Sasha, so they could see Nate properly and feel more like they were part of the crowd.
Lucy lost herself in the music, swaying along with Kristoff and grinning from ear to ear with every song.
It was like being back in the Guntherhütte again, a little bit drunk and euphoric, living in the moment and hoping it would never end.
‘I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it, but I’ve got an album coming out,’ said Nate, as the crowd roared. ‘Would anyone mind if I sang the first single from it?’ Another roar, so Nate said ‘Thank you. This is called “Can’t Be Mine”.’
He cleared his throat and started to strum, then closed his eyes and began a haunting ballad.
‘Don’t say it’s for the best
Don’t tell me I’ll be fine
You tore my heart to pieces
Telling me you can’t be mine.’
Lucy glanced at Sasha, wondering if this was their break-up song.
Sasha’s lips were pressed together and tears were flowing freely down her cheeks, and it occurred to Lucy that it was Sasha who had ended things with Nate, not the other way round.
His voice cracked in the final chorus, and Lucy could feel the depth of his pain.
God, poor Nate, she thought. He has the opposite problem to me.
He’s in love with Sasha, who doesn’t want to be with him, and I’m with Kristoff, who I don’t love.
It was the closest she’d felt to Nate since Switzerland, and she wished it was something they could talk about.
Nate wrapped up his set with a couple of Craig David hits, bringing the roof down on Woodsies in style. Then a video message from Elton John – actual Elton John! – and ‘Your Song’ as the encore. Then the crowd started to pour out of the tent, and it was all over.
‘Come on,’ said Kristoff, as Nate exited from the other side of the stage.
‘Let’s go and say hello.’ They headed back outside, where the heat of the day was drifting into a gloriously warm and sultry evening.
Lucy had planned to rush back to the Pyramid Stage for Lizzo at 7.
30, but right now her only priority was seeing Nate.
‘Lucy!’ shouted a voice, as Alex ran across the grass to pull her into a tight hug. ‘Did you see the show?’
‘Yeah,’ said Lucy, fixing her eyes on Alex even though Nate was just behind him. ‘We watched from the side of the stage.’
Alex turned to Kristoff and held out his hand. ‘I’m Alex, Nate’s manager,’ he said. ‘Big fan of your condoms. I use them all the time.’
‘Lucky you,’ laughed Kristoff.
Lucy turned to Nate, feeling like she might wet herself if she didn’t look at him soon.
‘Hey,’ she said quietly, awkwardly opening her arms in the hope he might let her hug him.
He obliged, and the brief moment of contact between them felt like taking off the backpack of tension she’d been carrying around all day.
He smelled of sweat and adrenaline and something else that was unmistakeably, distinctively Nate, and Lucy had to force herself to let go.
‘Thanks for coming,’ said Nate, turning to shake Kristoff and Jonno’s hands.
Everyone started prattling about how amazing Nate’s set was, but Nate’s eyes kept drifting back to Lucy.
She tried to look away, hoping Kristoff wouldn’t notice, because that would make for a very awkward car ride home, but he was too busy chatting intently with Alex.
‘Come and have a drink,’ said Alex, hooking his arm through Sasha’s and leading them all in the direction of the backstage bar.
The tables were cable reels stood on their end, surrounded by stools made from recycled metal milk churns.
Nate hung back to walk with Lucy, and even though Kristoff gave them a curious glance and Sasha was breaking her neck to look at them, they didn’t intrude.
‘I heard you were with Kristoff now,’ said Nate quietly.
‘Mmm,’ said Lucy. ‘For a few months now.’
‘He’s a nice guy,’ said Nate. ‘I’m happy for you.’
‘It’s just a casual thing,’ said Lucy quickly.
‘Right,’ said Nate, not looking remotely convinced. ‘Look, I’m sorry about Zoe’s wedding back in January. I was out of order.’
‘It’s fine,’ said Lucy.
‘No, it isn’t, but I’ve been wanting to explain. That week had been crazy, with everything that happened after we got back from Zermatt. I’d barely slept, and I wasn’t expecting to see you there.’
‘I wasn’t expecting to see you either,’ said Lucy. They walked side-by-side, close enough that Lucy could feel the heat of his body.
‘Anyway, I—’ he continued.
‘It’s OK, Nate,’ said Lucy, reaching out to touch his arm. The crackle of electricity made them both gasp and jump back.
‘We’ve still got some chemistry, I see,’ laughed Nate, blushing.
More than I’ve ever had with Kristoff, thought Lucy, feeling simultaneously guilty and more alive than she’d felt in months.
This feeling – this hum in her veins, this tingle of anticipation on her skin – was what she’d been trying to find since she’d finished with Marco and Anthony.
She’d forgotten what it felt like, until now.
Lucy looked away, feeling a bit flustered and needing to get a handle on the conversation. ‘It’s nice that Sasha is here,’ she said. ‘She told me you’d moved out.’
‘Yeah,’ said Nate. ‘It wasn’t really working. And look, I really appreciate you keeping quiet about her being . . . you know. It was a lot to ask.’
‘It’s fine,’ said Lucy again, feeling like there were still a million things to say apart from It’s fine, and time was running out. ‘You seeing anyone else?’
‘Er . . .’ muttered Nate, looking away. Lucy’s heart sank, furious with herself for asking the question. What purpose did it serve? They’d both travelled a thousand lifetimes since Zermatt, but in entirely different directions.
‘You guys want anything?’ shouted Kristoff, waving a bottle of champagne.
What do I want? thought Lucy. I want to feel absolutely sure that I’m in the right relationship with the right man. That I’m not still holding out for something I can’t have. She looked at Nate, who smiled bleakly.
‘Do they have any J?germeister?’ said Nate, and Lucy started to laugh.